Jayda's Musings

Mostly lurking

2007-02-24T02:12:00.000-06:00

I am back to lurking again, but just mostly lurking.

It has been a rough couple of years and a lot has changed in my life that keeps me very busy. I am a grandma now (I know, I need to update my profile info).

Don't know how much I will get to post, as I still am staying very busy and dial-up (all that's available in the country) is very slow and tedious, but I will try to blog occasionally.

Decided to keep the blog online for people to read, as I still get emails and inquiries occasionally. People still seem to enjoy reading - even if it is out of date.

With everything that has gone on, spanking (and DD) has taken a backseat in our lives for too long. We kept enough of it going to keep things interesting, but hopefully now things are picking up. Have a date with Q tomorrow for a stressbusting session before I start on everyone's taxes. He figures we'll have a few more of those in the midst of taxes as well (coz I tend to turn into a bitch).

That's all for now. Just thought I would let everyone know that I am still around even if I am just mostly lurking. I still think the world of this spanking community and all its participants. And I really haven't forgotten everybody - just been to effing busy.

BABY STEPS

2006-02-15T17:45:00.000-06:00

OK guys. I really am back to myself again after this past year of stress and grief. I just have to get my schedule together to figure out times to get online. There is a lot more to be done out here in the country, and dial-up really sucks.

Maybe in a year we will be totally unpacked, set-up, and the new computer built, but I promise, it won’t be that long before I am back online. In fact, I plan to at least post once a week from now on. I just have to figure out how to write again. Guess that’s what catching up on all the blogs will do for me.

My long deep grief after losing my mom surprised both Q and myself. I knew it would be hard on me, but I never thought it would be that deep and long. And trust me, (at least for me anyway), spankings were not the answer. I was to ‘low’ to start with and spanking (even a tiny one) just seemed to exacerbate the deep pain inside.

We had very few spankings, and basically put everything on hold. But we are back now, and Q is in rare form. I am sure he will be ‘paying me back’ for my brattiness over the last seven months. Just hope he takes it a little at a time. It’s amazing how quick the calluses on the butt go away.

Another problem with living in the country – there is an abundance of switches!! So I’ll have to work really hard at keeping from making Q ‘switching’ mad.

A late "Happy Holidays"

2006-01-07T23:40:00.000-06:00

Sorry guys. I know I have been absent again.

I wanted to at least wish everyone a Happy Holiday season (and I hope everybody had one), but life got in the way again.

We had yet another funeral the day after Xmas. A close cousin.

And I found out my brother has prostate cancer as well. Nothing like more crap to top off a horrendous year. And my niece is having a ‘problem’ pregnancy.

Now we are in full fire-fighting mode. It is so bad here that ANY spark has an 80% chance of igniting a fire, and if one gets started the wind feeds it and it’s usually out of control quickly.

So we have been busy clearing our land as best as possible to protect ourselves. Since we are in a rural fire district, we are our own first line of defense. And we live only about a mile off a small highway, and way too many idiots throw cigarette butts out. So we are being extra cautious.

We need rain so bad. For 2005 we were over 12” below normal, and with no measurable precipitation since October, we are a tinder box. This severe fire weather has my nerves on edge.

Q’s wrists are finally healing. And trust me, he is itching to spank. We’ve had a couple of light sessions, but we are not pushing it until he gets his arms and wrists well. So I really don’t have much to write, even if I had the time.

I am going to have to have some light female surgery (nothing serious). I hope to get that taken care of this month so that I am well healed by the time Q’s wrists are.

Plus I am worried about my Dad. His memory problems (although not extremely bad yet) are a concern and I have been visiting with his doctor about it. Hopefully the majority is just stress from this past year.

That’s the update for now. Hope to be back soon. Am looking forward to things settling down.

AWOL

2005-12-16T09:53:00.000-06:00

I am sorry I have been AWOL again for so long.

As it seems to be for 2005, my life is a mess. More shit has hit the fan, so to speak.

Starting in Nov., I was once again fighting a DOS (denial of service), spam attack on both my email and personal/business websites. This first happened back in March. That got straightened out and is now happening again from a different direction. I have spent so much time on the computer that I feel like I am starting to go blind. Needless to say, this doesn’t leave me time for the ‘fun’ computer play. Arrrrrgggggghhhhhhh!!!!! I think it is taken care of for now. This kind of crap makes you want to avoid computers all together though.

This is not a fun post – sorry. It’s just to let everyone know what is keeping me away. It is another crap post from my crappy year.

Other ‘crap’ (and not all of it by any means) I have been dealing with: my dad, my son’s car, my brand new stove doesn’t work, my new dishwasher doesn’t work right, our well is trying to shut down due to faulty work that I can’t get the co. to fix so now I am dealing with the state and a lawyer to get it done.

In the meantime, we can’t shower or do laundry because of insufficient well pressure so we have to drive 15 miles into town to take a shower or wash clothes.

Also, dealing with yet another contractor that screwed us on work that was supposed to be done.

And, Q blew out his wrists apparently due the the move so his mobility is limited. Therefore, there is limited to no spanking going on around here because of this. We are just trying to get him well.

And with all the stress of this year, my fibromyalgia has caught up with me and I am in the middle of a full blown ‘attack’ from within from that, and can hardly function.

All I can say is that there are 15 more days in this crappy year. I hope things change for the better after the New Year, coz I’m not sure how much more I can take.

I still plan on being around, if life’s crap will just settle down.

Updates

2005-10-24T01:18:00.000-05:00

I know, I know, now that I am back I need to update my sidebar on my blog - especially the links. So spank me - someone please. (Naw, I'll save the spanking for Q).

But I am on dial-up now (whines loudly), so ya'll are just going to have to be patient. Everyone out there who has generously linked to my blog, I will try to reciprocate when time allows.

Besides, I am still unpacking and trying to find everything in my new house (and that might go on for a couple more months).

Sorry, no reports on the kinky front here. Just plain old wonderful vanilla sex to wake up with on Saturday morning. Sometimes that's nice too (WEG).

Did the Internet Crash Thurs. Night?

2005-10-22T18:50:00.000-05:00

I know I am on lousy dial-up now, but even after hanging up and re-dialing Thursday night about 1am CDT, I couldn’t even get through to google.

Did any other night owls have any similar problems?

On Training a Sub

2005-10-21T00:26:00.000-05:00

In the training of a sub who is also a spanko, our conversations have wandered to how would be the most effective way of getting my attention enough during a spanking to actually moderate my behavior during a spanking.

And, I am looking for input and ideas from you readers as well.

During a punishment or a GP spanking, I am pretty good in that I don’t move too much (outside of wriggles) anymore, so what we are specifically looking for is how to ‘teach’ me to be quiet.

In the past, Q has almost always liked me to squeal and make noise while he was spanking me, as much for feedback on how the particular implement was affecting me, and for his own sadistic (g) satisfaction, and I was more than happy to comply. It has become a habit now.

As we are now in the country with lots of woods, Q and I would both enjoy sessions in the outdoors. However, he fears that if I get too loud, some one of the neighbors may overhear and wander up in an attempt to ‘protect’ me and that he might end up face to face with a shotgun. So he (and I) want me to learn to be quiet – or at least quieter.

And I know a sub should be able to be trained for her Dom’s needs.

Here is a list of (any one) what I think might work for me (based on pain and/or fears) by stopping in the middle of the spanking (when I broke training) and adding these in addition to the spanking and the counting of the same (or it could be assessed during the spanking and given within an hour or two of the original spanking after Q has had time to rest his arm – when I have had two spankings within a short period before, the second one has always hurt much worse and it could be proceeded by having me sit in a hot tub for 15 minutes before):

50 intense and focused strokes on the back with the big flogger

50 – 100 rapid and hard focused on each sit spot with the WM bathbrush

10 –15 hard with the large oak paddle with holes (Q doesn’t like doing many with this as it bruises to deep), followed quickly on top of the same area by 50 fast and hard with the CB or lexan paddle to bring up a searing burn on top of the bruises

Lexan caning (maybe 50) – this will have to be figured after learning how to best use it

50 hard with the punishment strap across the upper thighs (front or back)

Electrical cord ???? Don’t know how many/hard coz we haven’t ventured with this one yet, but the thought scares me.

Or maybe I should break down a buy a ‘Brat Loop’ from Leather Thorn. From what I have seen/heard, it is formidable.

(any of these, of course, starting over if I broke training with it)

Corner time, sit time, writing lines won’t work here because of my FMS.

I can’t think of a gag that will keep me quiet either – except may Am’s new one, which is probably not a possibility.

So, what do you guys think? Any ideas?

I GOT IT!

2005-10-19T01:24:00.000-05:00

I finally got the General Purpose/reconnection spanking I have been needing. And I am happily sporting light purple cheeks and a flogged red back to show for it. Ah, yes, cheerfully back in the lifestyle again.

However, I did learn something (besides the fact that my long unused bum was quite sensitive) – it is not a good idea to spank to crying when the spankee is on the tail-end of a chest cold and still has a small amount of crud in the longs. This can lead to choking. I actually had to call ‘Yellow’ (caution – on the edge of crisis) on Q tonight because of this (and it’s been a very LONG time since I have used a safeword for anything other than an emergency potty break).

He of course paused, for me to get over my coughing fit. And then resumed.

I was quite proud of myself. After 3+ months, I was afraid that it would be more like starting over in my learning how to accept spankings. But I quite quickly phased into acceptance and tears (no sobs - wasn’t necessary because it wasn’t a total punishment and I have done enough of that anyway over the past few months), but definitely real solid tears. And I didn’t wriggle much either.

I did have some fear creep in while Q was flogging my back hard. But that passed because it was during that, that I started coughing and we had a short pause. I don’t expect that ‘fear’ to happen again, as I have faced it and dealt with it.

When Q uses the flogger full force on my back it quite honestly hurts like hell, and seems to bring me to tears quicker than anything. Especially when he concentrates on one spot for more than a few strokes. My panic/fear came in when I could have sworn that he was cutting through my skin and that I had to be bleeding. Afterwards, looking at the mild marks, I am now comfortable again.

The painful effectiveness with minimal marks is why Q loves using the flogger like this. I just had to become ‘comfortable’ (if that is the word) with it again.

The chronology of the evening went something like this.

“You said you’ve been needing a real spanking. Let’s get it over with,” Q said in a slightly dom voice.

Testing him, I just sat in my recliner for a minute, until he got a little more commanding, letting me know he was serious. “Well, get in there and get ready,” he said gesturing towards the bedroom.

I entered the bedroom and quickly undressed.

“Well, get out your toys,” Q demanded.

I promptly obliged, pulling our new, bigger, toybox out from under the bed, leaving it on the floor next to the bed.

“Put it on the bed and open it so I don’t have to bend down to get things.”

I quickly did this as well and then promptly assumed the position over the end of the bed. Amazingly, I had no urgency to ‘pee’ tonight.

The first item Q picked was the new lexan cane. He swooshed it over my head several times and then it came down quickly on my back, burning sharply and setting the tone for the spanking. There was to be no warm-up. He was going to rapidly get to business.

After about six more with it on my back, burning with each stroke, he then moved to my thighs for about a dozen moderate strokes. (We are still learning this implement – it is very flexible so it is hard for him to tell exactly the effect he is getting from it or how it will mark or bruise – Q is always cautious with a new implement until he learns it to his satisfaction).

He then moved to the strap (Leather Thorn paddles) which has become one of his favorite implements. After about 100 with it, he pulled out the Whippy Gear paddle for another 30.

Then he decided my back needed attention and pulled out the small flogger for about a dozen. He quickly moved to the larger flogger on my back (HARD) for about 30.

Then onto the WM bathbrush for about 40 moderate strokes on my bum. Why is it that thing is so wicked even when used with medium intensity.

Then back to the flogger, hard, on my back for another 60 (with coughing interruption).

Then a few more strokes from the strap and a rapid-fire (but light) dozen from the lexan cane.

Q finished by using the flogger more sensually across my back, then buttocks, then my pussy until I reached orgasm.

We cuddled for a few minutes, then Q applied arnica to my bottom.

After going to the bathroom, we then crawled in bed together for a VERY NICE long cuddling session.

Since he wasn’t especially horny, we just reveled in cuddling and talking and reconnecting in our chosen lifestyle.

We kissed, we laughed, we talked. At one point Q grabbed both of my nipples and twisted them while we were laughing about the pain/pleasure aspect of it all and talking about me being such a pain-slut, and I screamed out “Oh, FUCK YES!!” as the orgasm hit me.

Then we really laughed.

We returned to the living room to watch some TV. After a bit, Q motioned to me to sit at his feet, which I of course did. We then talked some more about the Ds aspect of our relationship and how much I have had to mentally change my thinking, but that I actually like it, even though it is quite different from the way I have ever been.

He said that he really likes it too.

I told him that the scariest thing for me about the commitment I made to him when we decided to step into Ds, was when I truly realized that I had given him carte blanche to do with me as he pleased and to push me as far as he chose.

I then assured him that I totally trusted him with my life and that I would let him lead us wherever he wanted, and knowing me and us, would probably love any and every journey he chose to lead us on.

He gave me a big grin and a passionate kiss, assuring me that we would both enjoy our journey together.

Now I sit here typing this, after tucking him to bed in our usual fashion, smiling at what a wonderful evening this was indeed. Nothing like a good spanking to set everything right and reopen the lines of communication.

I just hope my butt stays nicely sore for a while. I’ve really missed this.

Needing...

2005-10-16T11:37:00.000-05:00

Ya know, I really really wanted a good hard spanking last night. But that didn’t materialize.

We had a long evening alone, but Q was tired from working on the property all day so we just had some mild Ds play.

After we showered together (yes – we now have a big shower – yay!), we sat naked in the living room watching Nascar on the tube. I was the good sub, serving him his drinks, and I thoroughly enjoyed giving him a very long oral session including ball sucking, rimming, and a blow-job. We hadn’t done that in so long and it was delicious.

When the race was over (kee-rap, JJ won and Rusty lost out in the last laps due to tire problems), I presented Q with something I had ordered back in late June. It is a lexan cane. It is very light and flippy and has a wonderful stinging sensation when used lightly. (I will have to tell later about the sensations when used with force).

Q started by using it on my nipples. WOW! That really gives a nice stingy fire. It didn’t take me long to reach an orgasm.

Then he proceeded to try it lightly on my inner thighs, as I was sitting at his feet. Again, nice sting/burn. And for as lightly as it was used, my thighs reddened quite quickly. I am still sporting a few light marks from it today. He then whipped my pussy with it til I had an orgasm. YUMMY!

A while later, he decided to try it on my back. This one is light and flexible enough to do that. My back was itching and Q decided this was a good ‘cure’. He was right, of course. Again, nice sting. After the light use, this implement gives me no fear of it’s use on the areas of the body that you wouldn’t normally use a stiff implement on.

We’ll just have to wait and see how much I like it when Q actually decides to use it with any force behind it.

Unfortunately for me, that was the end of any ‘spanking’ type activity. And I am really ‘in need’ right now. Maybe later this week. We have four nights of being alone as the kid is working and busy with his activities.

Continuing with the Ds, Q demanded a long BJ this morning when we woke – even before I could get up and have my coffee. Actually, I didn’t mind, as it has been so long since we have done much taking care of each other.

I just hope this week provides me with a long, hard, serious, re-connecting spanking that I desperately need. I am through with the heavy mourning, and I am ready for our lives to move forward and this will help to get me there.

BACK FROM THE MISSING

2005-10-14T00:32:00.000-05:00

First, I want to thank all of my e-friends for their kindness and understanding during this trying time. I had mentioned to several of them that I thought I would be back a few weeks ago, but truth be told, I just wasn’t quite ready. Now that I believe I am ready, I am writing this to let everyone know where I have been.

Most of you know that we had been in the process of trying to move. I am happy to say that that part of my life is through – as of two weeks ago (sans all the unpacking). Yes, we are moved (and love our new location), and yes we sold and closed on our ‘city’ house. Whew!! Actually, all the chaos of the move was probably a good thing to keep me from dwelling on the bad.

I can now finally write about the bad without breaking into heaving sobs. On July 15th, my Mom and best friend of 20+ years passed away. It was sudden. She took a fall and cracked her skull, lived to the hospital, and made it through the surgery just fine. We found out the next day (cat scan) that the reason she fell was a massive stroke, that, had she survived, would have probably left her a vegetable. So, in a way, her dying was a blessing. She would not have wanted that. However, 36 hours between her fall and her death, was not near enough time to prepare for it emotionally.

And, my dealing with it all has been something else. Q has been a wonderful support. And, as I said before, the chaos of everything that had to be done for the move, was a good distraction. But it has taken me until about two weeks ago, to start to feel ‘normal’ again. Until then, I felt an ‘ache’ and a loneliness throughout my body that I can’t quite describe. I just miss her soooooo bad.

So far, my Dad is doing all right. In some ways I think he is dealing with it better than I have. Although I cannot imagine having someone that you have spent over 60 years with gone. It makes me shudder. I try to keep him busy with things that he can do to help me on our land.

He also had his pacemaker replaced last month (stating that he planned to wear out another one), so that is making him feel physically better at least. However, sitting in the waiting room while he was in surgery so soon after loosing my mom, did nothing for me or my nerves.

Add to this, my mom’s stepbrother went into the hospital a week after her funeral, and is still in the hospital as I write (long story, but things do not look good). And my father-in-law is going to have to have surgery for a possible malignancy. As I said in a much earlier post, 05’ has not been a good year for us.

Well readers (if I have any left), that is the last few months in brief. There has been more, albeit minor, that I won’t bore you with.

Needless to say, DD/Ds has been pushed aside. I just couldn’t deal with it and Q saw that. Prior to my mom’s death, I had a few spankings that I hadn’t yet written about, but since then I have had maybe two ‘hard’ (not to our normal level) ones, and a few playful ones, but that has been it.

I have just been too emotionally overwrought and we have both been too tired with the move to even think about much play. Even our 21st anniversary passed without fanfare. We were just too busy. However, we plan on celebrating it late in the coming few weeks.

I am just now recovering from a heavy head and chest cold that I have been battling for the last two weeks and Q is still a bit congested from his as well. So now that my illness is past, I am happy to announce that Q’s little ‘painslut’ is ready for action again.

Barring any other unforeseen circumstances, I hope to be back to posting here at least a couple of times a week – hopefully with some nice juicy ‘spanking’ stories.

I have been lurking some this past week and I must say I am intrigued by what I am reading. Some of Patty’s stuff has me encouraged to push my own limits. We’ll just have to wait and see what develops in the future.

Sorry I've been missing

2005-06-28T17:17:00.000-05:00

Just wanted to post a note here to let everyone know that I am still around. It's just that for at least the next couple of weeks, I will be EXTREMELY busy.

We are trying to finish getting our house ready to sell (it is amazing how many little things you tend to let go coz they don't bother you) and at the same time have purchased some 'virgin' land and have to get it ready to move onto (well, septic, bulldozer, electric, etc. etc.).

Plus we are fighting a major issue with our city council as well.

Add to that, our oldest (& friends) decided to move across the city about the time he is supposed to be helping us. And, he had a wreck (he is fine) and almost totalled his car. And since it was his fault (and we only carry liability), we are having to help him find where to get it fixed cheap while he was looking for a new job (which he finally found, thank goodness).

As they say, when it rains, it pours. Chaos abounds here!!!!

Trust me, Q is keeping me in line during all this mess. I have had my share of spankings just to keep my attitude straight and focused where it should be. Hopefully, when things are more settled, I will be able to post about them (I have been keeping notes - just nothing worth posting coz no one could make sense of them but me WEG).

When we finally get on the land, I will have to post a picture of our view. It is gorgeous. Right now I just keep having to tell myself it will all be worth it.

Thanks for reading and checking. And yes, I WILL BE BACK.

Saturday's fun

2005-06-08T02:14:00.000-05:00

I'm writing from notes as fast as I can, really.

I forgot to mention in my last post that we have a temporary new member of our household. One of the kids friends moved in with us temporarily while she is looking for a place to move. Her mother kicked her and her sister out in a fit of rage. This girl has always been like another one of my own kids, so it was natural for her to come to me for help. I am glad that we have the extra bedroom for her to crash in. She is 18, and has a line on roommates and a place to live, but they probably can’t move in until the end of the month. So we have another person to work ‘spanking’ around.

She has always thought that Q and I are a hoot because we are so at ease and relaxed with issues relating to sex – be it just talking, or the fact that we play and tease and cuddle with each other openly. But I don’t think she really needs to be exposed to our kinks either.

OK, back to our life. Fri. nite when we got back from the pow-wow, Q’s hand was just itching to spank me. Anytime we were alone in a room, he would smack my butt with his hand, or whatever was close. But we were never alone to ‘play’. So he just got a long, quiet (well kind of – I was way hungry for his come and was noisy about getting it) blow job.

Sat. morn, was more of the same. I could tell he was just itching to spank me for the sake of it. So I confronted him. “You are just dying to spank my butt just for the heck of it aren’t you,” I asked him, grinning, while we were in the bedroom.

“Yeah, yeah, I am,” Q replied with a smirk, grabbing me and kissing me while hand smacking my butt. “We’ll have to wait ‘til later though. But you can do this right now,” he said, pushing me to my knees, while dropping his pants.

I quickly complied, hungrily giving him the second blow-job in twenty-four hours.

As we worked around the house (we are refinishing woodwork), he made lots of pains to ‘torment’ me as well. Often cornering me and squeezing and twisting on my nipples to orgasm while I had to be as quiet as possible (which for me is a MAJOR effort). Sometimes he would just bring me to the brink, and then leave me hanging. He can be so evil WEG.

It wasn’t until midnight, when the kids left to fold papers, that we had time alone. I was actually so tired I went to bed expecting to sleep coz I figured Q was just as tired. Silly me.

As Q gets into bed, he pulls out the lexan paddle w/holes. Once he is comfortably propped up on his pillows, he directs me across his lap. When we are both comfortable, he began spanking.

Moderately light spanks started, then he increase the intensity until I was ‘yelping’ sufficiently. After about 40ish hard smacks, he lightened up just a bit, and started spanking with a nice steady rhythm until I came.

Then we both started laughing. I still find it somewhat wild that a spanking can give me an orgasm, and he finds it rather amusing as well. Then he began swatting my butt again until I had a nice case of spanking freckles. He has decided he likes this position for spanking (I think it is kind of nice too).

Of course, he is now lamenting that he doesn’t have enough OTK length tools. Gee, is that my hint to implement shop? Probably not. He has forgotten about vermin, and I’m not real likely to remind him anytime soon WEG.

Then, as I am still sprawled across his lap, he commands me to cum. “Cum slut, NOW! Cum for me,” in his Dom voice. And, quite amazingly, I did. After a few minutes, he repeated his command, and I duplicated my response.

Then I really started laughing. I guess we have been playing with the Ds long enough that I immediately respond to his ‘Dom’ tone of voice. How quickly I responded amazed both of us as well.

Then Q told me that he had been talking to a friend of ours (who is also into Ds/DD) and had gotten the idea from him (beware girls, when two SO’s get together in person I am beginning to think this spells trouble – WEG). Now Q is trying to think of a ‘code’ word that means ‘cum NOW’, no matter where I am at. That is what this friend does with his Angel, and Q thinks it is a fun idea.

It probably is, but I am wary as to when he might actually do this to me. Yikes! Could be embarrassing.

After cuddling for a bit, Q lotioned my bottom, and then I gave him another blow job (I mean, what better way to thank your hubby for a yummy spanking).

Afterwards, we cuddled and talked for awhile in amazement of what this new turn in our lives has given us.

What was so neat about this entire weekend, was that despite all the work and our limited activities, I sensed a new comfort level with our relationship from Q. He has really relaxed with everything and started finding his own way in our relationship. Now, should I be worried????? Probably (WEG)

So spank me.....

2005-06-05T21:21:00.000-05:00

Sorry all. Have just been to busy with life to write. And unfortunately, writing comes slowly for me :(

This past Fri., Q had the day off from work so that we could enjoy a local pow-wow event. So that morning, before we left, and while the youngest was still asleep, he took care of some spanking business with me.

I had three small ‘rules’ violations in addition to two episodes of losing my temper, so I knew I was going to get a serious spanking, but most of all it was a de-stress spanking for ‘both’ of us.

Q has gotten in the habit of pulling out the ‘toy’ box, and then laying out each implement that he might use alongside where I bend over the end of the bed. Then he quite often tells me not to look (yeah right). But this time he told me to ‘pick’ the first one, ‘carefully.’

Gathering from that ‘warning’ I didn’t dare pick something light, but I sure didn’t want to give him his favorite school paddle or bathbrush to start with, so I chose the strap.

He laid about fifty hard ones on me with it, then moved to the bathbrush for another 70 or so. Then the whippy-gear for another 30ish. Q then pulled the Arnica out and started rubbing my bum with it, signaling (at least most of the time) that this was the end of the spanking. But I waited, until he told me I could get up.

It was one of those times when I didn’t really want a spanking, but I knew I needed it, and the spanking was damned hard and I was more than ready for it to be over, yet when it was over, it wasn’t really enough. Yeah, yeah, spanking-schizo jibberish here.

But more was not in the cards, because just as I got up, the oldest kid came in the front door.

As I mentioned above, our life has been crazy chaos for a couple of weeks, and will probably be so for the rest of the summer. We are trying to get our house ready to sell, and find a new place to move in the country (which is hard by itself), get rid of a lot of excess furniture and school stuff, and help our oldest move to a new place too. Plus, I am still dealing with the mess from the wreck earlier this year, and trying to keep an eye on my dad’s health.

So readers, please forgive me if I am sporadic this summer. I will stick around, and try to post as much as possible, because I do want to keep my ‘journal’. I am not like some bloggers (WEG) who have stuff that they can post without having to write it at the moment. I don’t have cool stories or pictures I can just pull out and put up. Nor do I have the time to surf and find cool links/pics as well.

We are just so busy with all the stuff, that we are often to tired for sex and or spanking. It’s not that we don’t wanna. And this lifestyle is definitely NOT going away for us. It’s just that things have to be postponed and toned down for awhile.

Okay, Okay, I'll post more tomorrow

2005-05-31T02:08:00.000-05:00

But for now, I'll just say "Hi".

No, things have not been completely flat or devoid of spanking, but you'll have to wait a bit and then I'll catch you up.

We have just been extremely busy. Aunt in the hospital, birthday, holiday weekend, trying to get kid into college, looking for new place to live in the country, and trying to get this house ready to put up for sale.

Luckily, I have had 'just' enough spankings to keep me from going crazier.

So, to answer your questions, yes I am still here, and I am working on a spanking post for all you kinkos out there WEG.

Book Tag

2005-05-25T01:20:00.000-05:00

Thanks Am for tagging me - here goes

1. Total number of books I’ve owned
Ha ha ha ha ha (rolls across floor into bookshelf) ha ha! Like I, a confirmed read-a-holic who has been reading since she was three (makes 44 years), could answer that. Not to mention being a homeschool mom of 2 with at any given time, a library full of reading books at the kids various levels, along with textbooks. You have got to be kidding. And no, I’m not going to go count. P~~~~~~~~~. Counting would take hours just going through the boxes in the attic.

My best guess is that we probably have around 5k in the house at this moment. But I’ll guarantee I’ll add to it at the next garage sale or shopping trip.

Through my childhood I owned so many it was amazing. Spent every penny I could earn on books, as well as keeping my parents broke buying them for me (to keep me out of trouble - WEG). By the time I was 8, had read every book in our small town public library as well, and was having my brother check out books for me from the small college library.

2. The last book I bought.
The entire collection of Poe, for my son, Ernst & Young’s Tax Guide, Mensa Mind Challenges, for my other son, Nancy Fridays My Secret Garden and Susie Santiago’s Many Kisses (have just started), Perl Core Language, Leonard Peltier’s Prison Writings, plus Popular Science and Popular Mechanics magazines. Q hates it when I go into a bookstore. I can’t leave for less than a C-note. What can I say, I just love the smell of book lint.

3. The last book I read.
I actually re-read an old favorite. Mary Summer Rain’s Phoenix Rising (Got lucky here – I usually read 4-5 simultaneously but I have been to busy reading on the web instead – WEG)

4. 5 Books that mean a lot to you.
5 is not enough. So I’ll just list them by author blocks. And I’m sure I’ll leave out a few.

Richard Bach – Jonathan Livingston Seagull, and Illusions are my tops on his list, but I’ve read all that he has written and love them all.
Dick Sutphen – Master of Life Manual, You Were Born Again to Be Together (top two favs, no longer in publication – I have read all of his as well and love them)
Mary Summer Rain – Spirit Song, Phoenix Rising (top two – have read most of hers, but her quality went down in later books)
Sylvia Browne – Prophecy (amongst others)
Zena Henderson – The People Series (sci-fi)
Thea Divine – several of hers, really hot erotica
Orwell – 1984 (ya’ll oughta read this right now – spooky)
Bertrand Russell – Why I am not a Christian, A History of Western Philosopy
Joseph Campbell – Transformations of Myth through Time (among others –
most all of his are fascinating
Doug Boyd – Mad Bear, Rolling Thunder
Thomas E. Mails – Fool’s Crow series
Antonio R. Damasio – Descartes Error
Einstein’s Space and Van Gogh’s Sky – Leshan & Margenau
J.R.R. Tolkein - all
Edgar Allen Poe – all
Shakespeare – all (love the man’s wicked humor and political jabs)
Edgar Cayce - most
Ruth Montgomery – most
Raymond Moody - some

And a bookshelf full of really good medical books, but I won’t bore you by listing them

Told ya I had way too many to list. (Yeah, I know. I can’t count)

5. Tag 5 people and request they fill this out on their journal.
Collar purple – Invidia
Terri
Gabriel
Chula

Everyone else I can think of has already been tagged (since I am so late posting this). Terri, Chula, and Gabriel, since yall don't have your own blogs, you can post here in the comments, or email your answers to me and I will post. Have fun.

OK, I'm pissed

2005-05-24T01:38:00.000-05:00

This damned blogger lost my post (and it was a lot of effing work) on Book Tag.

Recover it? Hell no, doesn't work.

Maybe I'll repost tomorrow. I do have it Am, just to PO'd to mess with blogger again tonight.

And then posting this it gave me a frigging error message about some mysterious 'required field'. WTH???

Icky week

2005-05-19T22:35:00.000-05:00

Sorry, I just haven't felt much like posting this week. I do have some stuff, but it will wait until later (random thoughts postings). Mainly this has been an icky week. Almost everyone I have talked to both online and off has been edgy or cranky (at least in the background). And I have tried to 'be good' this week and just handle my mood without upsetting everyone else. But things kind of erupted tonight. Not bad, but enough to let Q know that I really needed an 'attitude adjustment' spanking. So I'll be getting that tomorrow, after the kids leave on their trip.

As far as anything else going on here. Pretty much the blahs. As itchy as Q's palm was last week, it has gone pretty dormant this week. So outside of a few playful bedtime surprise smacks, there really hasn't been much to write about.

What I am posting next is an email I received from a reader. When they wrote and told me how much they like my blog, I decided to ask why. Here's the great response I received:

Hmmmm...what do I like best about your blog?
That's a tough one, if only because I don't quite know where to start :-)
I truly enjoy the liberated writing style...
Your willingness to share the intimate (both sexual and non-sexual) details of your relationship.
Your ability to shed the mask we all wear and admit some very personal truths to the reader.
Your willingness to look inside yourself and grow in areas where you recognize a need.
Your ability to celebrate the positive and negative aspects of life.
The list goes on and on...
In general, I want to thank you for writing so honestly, and would encourage you to post a pic or two.
I'm really grateful to T. for posting her pic, not only for its inherent beauty, but also for what it represents in terms of her vulnerability, trust, etc. So I hope you will find it within yourself to post sometime in the near future.
Thanks again for your writing :-)

I thought it was pretty neat. Made me feel great, so I thought I would share it here. It's hard to know how other people feel about what you do unless they tell you. And it's especially nice when they really compliment your work.

This Wonderful Week of Growth

2005-05-13T14:25:00.000-05:00

As bad as it may have seemed to some, a whole lot of really good things came as a result of last Saturday’s punishment.

First, of course, was the crying breakthrough. I hope this was the ‘crack’ that my armor needed to allow me to now cry and release more easily.

Second, was my discovery/realization about how hard it really is for Q to dole out harsh punishment spankings because he an empath. It made me realize what a truly difficult job he has taken on by agreeing to take the reins as HOH, and help me keep me in line.

Third, we did a whole lot more talking about the lifestyle. Where we have come, what it has done for us, why it works, why communication is so important, why and how I have learned to tell him what I need, etc, etc. He also said that he is now truly seeing how improved our relationship really is – and he likes this very very much. (Yay)

Fourth, after seeing what my backside looked like after such a severe thrashing, and realizing that it wasn’t nearly as bad as it felt it was while it was occuring, I no longer even feel the need for a safeword with Q. Yeah, we’ll still keep one for extreme emergencies, but I doubt it will ever be used again.

Fifth, Q learned how to effectively communicate to me exactly what his feelings were about issues that he feels are punishable. And how to scold me, so that he doesn’t feel like he is demeaning me in doing so.

Sixth, I think that Q finally let go of all his fears (being abusive, it being a ‘mental’ issue for me concerning my past, hitting women is bad, etc) over this lifestyle and is now blooming into a full-fledged spankerman. (Goody, goody, YIKES, goody)

Seventh, I also think he finally was able to admit that he likes spanking me for his sake, as well as mine and how much it truly allows him to work through any anger or disappointment he has with me.

Eighth, I think I also learned how to mentally ‘submit’ to a punishment and push my ‘tough as nails’ attitude aside. And this was a MAJOR step for me.

Ninth, that I truly, deeply, desire to be completely ‘owned’ by Q.

Tenth, I got to learn for myself, and Q got to see what all the phases are that I go through during a punishment to finally get me to a resolution.

There are lots more that I have forgotten, I’m sure. But we made sooooo many positive leaps forward in our relationship (both just us, as well as DD/Ds), since Saturday it has been amazing and astounding. I have absolutely no fear that we will ever turn back now.

Unfortunately, while the catharsis was great, and much needed, we still haven't reached complete closure with the ‘incident’, but I have faith that that will come in due time as well.

Even at 46, and 21 years into our wonderful marraige, it still blows my mind when things just keep getting better and better (especially when things seemed pretty near perfect to start with). This week has indeed been incredible.

The New Strap

2005-05-12T15:28:00.000-05:00

I had another ‘not so great’ day, but thanks to yesterdays spanking, I managed to keep it from affecting my mood.

Today was mostly just phone stuff and the 90% of phone messages that were never returned. Don’t ya just love this. I think tomorrow I will put on my ‘bitch’ coat when I start going back through these calls. (And hopefully have it ‘off’ before Q gets home).

We received the strap I had ordered from Leather Thorn Paddles on Monday. But I decided to wait to show it to him until my bottom had healed a bit. So I sat it out for him today.

He was true to form, in that he had to try it out. So that now makes 7 spankings in 6 days. At least tonight it was only fifteen swats of varied intensity. Lucky for me, Q was too tired for anything else.

Paddle Review

This one can be incredibly sensual with just the right amount of sting.

It can also hurt like heck, when Q swings it hard.

Q’s only complaint is the handle (and his hands). This is totally my fault, though. I should have paid more attention to the design before ordering it, because I am sure John could have customized something for Q, had I thought to ask.

Q’s problems with his hands, resulting from years at a keyboard, are touchy (that’s why he rarely spanks with them). He also has short fingers with broad hands, which makes gripping something comfortably a challenge.

While the handle is very nice in hands like mine, he really needs a rounded handle with a slight enlargement on the end. Especially for the angles he chooses to swing from.

All in all, though, it is a great new toy with a whole new range of sensations available. And it is superbly crafted and beautiful as well. John is definitely an expert at the leatherwork.

Hopefully, I will get the hang of posting pics pretty soon. If I do, and then actually get the time to photograph everything, I will put up a page here linking to all of our toys. At least this one, you can see on John’s website.

Tuesday - Yet another spanking

2005-05-12T01:40:00.000-05:00

Yep, you are getting two posts here today. There has just been so much going on, I figured I'd give ya'll two.

I had to go to the eye doctor today. I went yesterday and he didn’t like the pressure reading, so he wanted me to come back. Everything was OK today. But that didn’t stop him being arrogant with me over an issue that I had questions about. This was the beginning of a ‘mood’.

Then as I was looking at glasses, I had one girl tell me one thing that could be done, and another tell me something totally different. Then another get flat pushy and arrogant with me. So I left, pissed. Add to the ‘mood’.

I went from there to the grocery store. I hate shopping. Especially in this town where at least half of the people you encounter think they are better than God, and that they are the center of the world and to hell with you if they are blocking the isle. Add more to the already crappy ‘mood’.

Then I drop stuff as I am unloading the car, keep dropping stuff as I am trying to put up groceries, get interrupted by an annoying sales call that I had already told the company to not call me again. Exponentially add to the ‘mood’.

There were several other things that just didn’t go well today as well. So by the time I have the groceries put up I am remembering how sore my bottom still is and I am thinking that I really don’t want another spanking. I decided to just sit down and try to calm myself down and get back under control. I am really glad it is just 3, and there are still a few more hours before Q gets home.

And the kid leave to go out with a friend for the evening.

When he does finally get home we do are typical sharing of our day. His was so-so. He had been butting his head against a wall (figuratively) over a programming glitch that he couldn’t isolate all afternoon. I, of course, had to share my challenges as well, but I at least was able to do it in a non-bitchy manner now, after cooling off.

He grinned, and cocked his head a looked at me. I knew damned well what he was thinking. He was wondering if I needed a spanking. I just sat there and smiled and didn’t say a thing, so he moved on to the kitchen.

I asked him what he wanted for dinner, saying we could have sandwiches, or take the risk of me burning down the kitchen cooking hamburgers. This was the wrong thing to say.

“I think someone needs a spanking to de-stress,” he commented turning to face me.

“Naw, I’m OK,” I quickly replied with a smile scrambling to cover up my still nagging mood.

Q stands there with his hands on his hips and stares at me, with a twinkle in his eye.

“Besides that, my butt is still really sore,” I say, still scrambling to talk my way out of it.

“Your butt is healing fine.” He then starts towards the bedroom, “Well, come on. Let’s get this over with.”

“Oh no baby, please?” I start whining. Now this is really not like me.

He then gives me that raised eyebrow stern look that says ‘do you want more’, and I start moving towards him.

We get to the bedroom, and I slowly undress and move into position over the edge of the bed while he pulls out the darned bathbrush. Shit – this is really going to hurt. I don’t like that thing even on a ‘good’ butt.

And Q begins, but thankfully only moderately hard. I had to stop him five strokes in because I had forgotten to change my tampon. This he will stop for.

As I scramble to change it, and pee at the same time, I get the ‘you better not be stalling’ lecture. It’s amazing how long it takes to get your semi-full bladder to relax when you are under pressure.

Finally, I am back into position. I know I am getting extra for not having prepared before it started. So I clutch hard to my pillow as he begins anew.

40 with the big bathbrush, 20 with the braided nylon belt, and 30 more with the bathbrush and it is over. Kind of short by Q’s standards, but I guess he figured he didn’t need to over do it on my still bruised bum. Funny thing is, I was actually closer to crying with this short episode, than I ever had been with a short spanking before Sat.

After Q applied arnica to my bottom, he crawled beside me in the bed and we kissed and cuddle. Then he pulled my chin up, so he could look in my eyes.

I worked really hard to give him the ‘smiley eyes’ he has come to expect, but I knew in my heart that the spanking had fallen a bit short of that target.

He laughed, seeing me struggle to make the ‘smiley eyes’ and then ‘threatened’ to spank some more to get them there. But his cuddling and laughter made everything better, and he was soon satisfied that I was Ok, at least for the evening. Now we were both de-stressed.

An orgasm later, and we were back in the kitchen foraging for dinner. As I sat down (a little harder than I should have) to eat, I yelped an ‘Ouch.’

Q grinned and said, “Good, I like it when its ouchy.” (He can be so ‘evil’)

This got him the p~~~~~~~.

As we were eating, I confessed that had he been home at three, I was in such a mood that I would have probably given him a fight and he would have had to drag me to the bedroom.

With an evil grin he said, “Sounds like fun.” (I think he has read too many of Patty’s stories).

Then he looked at the calendar and said, “Looks like we have another free weekend to address some issues too.”

I gulped, and he said, “Did I hear a gulp?”

Nodding yes, I said meekly, “Whatever you wish, sir.” Then he just dropped the subject, leaving me to anticipate his plans for the weekend.

Later, when we went to the bedroom, I sprawled out across the bed in spanking position, waiting for him to finish brushing his teeth.

“Does my little slut want more?” he asked.

“Just some lotion please sir,” I replied.

After applying the lotion, which went on without much pain this time, Q still couldn’t resist taking a couple of hand smacks on my bottom. The ‘itchy palm’ strikes again (hehehe).

Afterwards as we cuddled in bed, his creative juices started flowing. We literally laughed for almost an hour at all the spanking related cartoon parodies he was coming up with. To bad neither of us can draw. I just wish I could remember them all.

Maybe, I’ll eventually get him to post here.

Monday evening and the Belt

2005-05-12T01:31:00.000-05:00

When Q got home from work, I followed him to the bedroom to visit while he changed clothes and got comfortable.

Of course, I plopped on the bed face up, towards the edge with my knees pulled up so that my feet were on the bed. We discussed both of our days, while he was in the bathroom, because I was fixing to leave with our kid to go to a practice of his.

When Q walked out, he looked at the position I was in a grabbed a belt. Eeeep! Now this belt is one we had never tried. It is a braided nylon type stretchy material and Q figured it wouldn’t be any good for spanking. But at this point, it wouldn’t take much on my butt.

I think the man is suffering from a serious case of ‘itchy palm’ this week, coz he just can’t seem to stay away from smacking my ass (lol).

Luckily, I have my jeans on as he motions for me to raise my legs (the dreaded diaper position) and then smacks me one with it. YIPES that hurt as I yelped a bit and dropped my legs back down.

This reaction just further serves to feed the ‘Dom’ in him. So he tells me to get my legs back up and to be quiet. I reach for the pillow to cover my face as I raise my legs back up. Again, thank goodness I have my jeans on.

Q then proceeds to give me 30 smacks with the belt, progressively harder. Do you know how hard it is to keep your legs in the air without holding onto them, while you are being spanked?

After he was through, he helped me up off the bed and kissed me, grinning. “That’s just a reminder to behave tonight, slut.” He then declared this belt a worthy implement for the arsenal. He obviously liked how much it made me wriggle and sqeal.

I have to concur. My butt was still stinging (and my pussy still wet) a couple of hours later. Now whether it was actually the belt (over jeans), or the combination of it and the constant use my butt had recently seen, is something we’ll have to find out in the future.

Starting last Wednesday with the caning, and after days break on Thurs., I have had five spankings in four days. My butt is really sore. And I think a true ‘spankerman’ has been born WEG.

Monday morning wake-up call

2005-05-11T14:47:00.000-05:00

Well, after falling asleep way too early (well before midnight), Sunday night, I woke up around 3am. And I couldn’t get back to sleep (typical for me). So I sat at the computer, perused blogs and forums, and started typing my entry from Saturday. (It takes me a long time to construct a post).

Of course, I couldn’t sit in one position for an extended period, so I was up and down doing other things as well. Man-o-man, this time my bum is really raw and burning and tender - more than ever before. But I did get it finished for the blog.

Actually, by the time I had finished it, I was pretty horny (being the pain-slut that I obviously am), and it was right at 6am. I knew that was when Q’s alarm was set to go off.

So, I snuck back into the bedroom, undressed, and crawled right between his legs (hehehe), and started his week with a morning blow job. Figured that would be a great way to start his week (and mine).

After, we were lying in bed cuddling and talking, for some reason his hand kept wandering down to my butt, and smacking it (lightly) and pinching it, making me moan. After having the weekend that we did, my butt was still pretty sore, so even light smacking had me smarting pretty quickly.

Q then gave me a titty-gasm, and his hands again wandered to my bum for a smack or two.

Then I made some smart-assed remark about him having developed an ‘itchy palm’. This proceeded to get me smacked again. So I just turned my butt to him, for easier reach.

Aaahhhh, but this was a good thing. Q proceeded to rhythmically smack my bottom with increasing intensity until I exploded into orgasm. Then we both burst into laughter, at ourselves, for acting like a couple of lusty teenagers who just ‘couldn’t get enough’.

Pretty good way to start the week, huh.

Sunday - The Cane

2005-05-11T03:19:00.000-05:00

Sunday morning came, and Q and I spent a long time loving on each other before we got out of bed. (Sorry guys, I haven’t learned how to write a hot sex scene like Patty yet – but maybe I’ll get closer someday)

When we got up to get breakfast, Q noticed that I wasn’t quite his ‘bright eyes’ he likes to see after a good spanking. So we talked.

I told him that while the punishment and catharsis were close to perfect, and I was feeling much better (albeit sore) for it all, that I truly didn’t feel like I had yet been able to put my guilt behind me and put a closure to the ‘incident’.

He said that he understood and that we would work through it together. I asked him where he was with ‘closure’ and he said he thought he had, but he really wasn’t sure yet. Time, and future events would tell. But he was feeling much better about it, and a lot of things relative to our relationship.

That was evident to me as well. Q was much more relaxed and contented and generally happier than I had seen him in weeks.

So we talked some more and finally decided that what I needed for now was a reinforcement visit to my bottom with the cane, about 12 good strokes. As the kid was still sound asleep, we decided to take care of it right then.

Now, my bottom is already so sore that it twinges to even walk – not to mention that sitting anywhere but my cushy recliner is difficult, at best. So when Q extends his hand to me to lead me to the bedroom, I am a bit hesitant, but I do follow willingly – knowing he is doing this for us.

I immediately undress (Q prefers full nudity when spanking) and he instructs me to get the cane. I pick the middle sized one and hand it to him. Then we kiss, long and hard before I bend over the bed and ready myself. No restraints this time – just my willpower.

Q rubs the cane across my back and buttocks, letting me relax into position. Then he measures his aim and begins. Whack! Oooo. Whack….Whack…. With each whack my moans get a little louder and I am realizing how bad this really hurts and burns on top of my already bruised bum. I manage to keep to just moaning until about the seventh stroke, which was a bit harder, and I started squealing a bit. Q kept up for another five, and I manage to quiet back down. I was doing really good at holding still, considering. I guess last night had taught me a new lesson in keeping position.

Q paused, and then surprised me (as he often does), by moving to my right side and starting again. At this point I am thinking to myself, “He has already done twelve. Oh well, he knows best and apparently he thinks my bum can handle more. He obviously thinks I need more – I’ll handle it. But I wonder how many.”

After another eight or so, I am starting to yelp and jump a bit, but I am still holding position. He finished off with another harder four, and I only stood up, slightly, once, when the cane wrapped a bit.

No tears, this time. It was short. But I felt a new humility within, and extreme gratefulness that he loved me this much.

I knew it was through, when he started applying the arnica ointment. While he was rubbing it into my bottom, I realized just how sore and raw my bum was, because the actual touching of some areas was almost as painful as the spanking itself, and it caused me to jump and ‘ouch’ a bit.

After he was through ‘treating’ my bottom and had given me permission to get up, we held each other for a long while, stretching out on the bed to cuddle. It seems we just can’t get enough of just touching and cuddling and loving on each other, irregardless of the sex (although I really couldn’t resist giving him a blow job – he is just too darned sexy).

I can’t possibly express to anyone how precious it is for me to have such a loving, caring man as Q in my life. I am so blessed.

It wasn’t too long until we heard our oldest boy come in the front door. So we dressed and went out to join him.

I, of course, had to check in the mirror for marks (funny how we love to do this). Q gets a kick out of me enjoying my marks too. Crazy thing is, the caning only left one small welt, and one tip mark where it had wrapped. And silly me – I was disappointed that there weren’t more marks. Of course Q offered to take care of that, but I wisely declined for the time. My bottom still didn’t look too bad, considering. It did hurt and sting however.

However, dressing in my jeans was another story. The ointment had left me slightly sticky, so my jeans ‘stuck’ too. It was touchy. I would have rather worn loose shorts, but the activities of the weekend showed too many marks on my thighs that might have been seen if I sat wrong – so jeans it was.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. The additional morning caning, had left me feeling better too. Q was pleased that my ‘smiley eyes’ look was back.

Whatever the look is in my eyes that Q calls ‘smiley’, is now his main judge on whether he has spanked me enough. And he is usually right.

By Sunday night, we were both exhausted. I actually fell asleep before Q. This is a very rare occurance, since I am such a night owl.

We interrupt this weeks events...

2005-05-11T00:40:00.000-05:00

Man-o-man am I ever having a hard time sitting right now. I’m interrupting my posts from Sun, Mon, and today, just to pop this in here.

Not only did I get what was in the previous posts, but I have been spanked four times since (not near like Sat. tho) – man is my butt ever OUCHIE! (Yes, posts for those are forthcoming – I am just a slow writer).

And, my new toy (strap from Leather Thorn Paddles) just arrived and I will have to show it to Q tomorrow. And you know he is going to want to test it out ASAP.
And, our son will be out working tomorrow night. How darned convenient. In my defense, this strap was ordered way before the Saturday event.

Obviously, my spankerman is in full bloom and finding a comfort level with his role as HOH. Now if I can just find my comfort level for sitting…

When we were cuddling in bed tonight, Q’s creativity took hold. I hope he will eventually take the time to expand on what he came up with tonight. We spent at least an hour, laughing hilariously over all the cartoon spoofs he came up with.

And it all started with me calling him my loving spankerman.

Tears – finally – as the Reckoning begins

2005-05-09T17:04:00.000-05:00

Saturday begins with the pounding of the roofers. We spent most of our day doing the usual Saturday stuff – errands and working on the house and bantering with our kids.

I cooked a nice roast, and all the fixings Q likes, in hopes of putting him into a good mood for the evening. At this point, Q had still given me little to go on about what ‘type’ of spanking he was planning with the switches for the evening – leaving me hanging and wondering (as was his plan).

Around 5:30, we were alone for the evening and my anxiety level was slowly rising. Having only yesterdays mild experience with the switches, did nothing but make the anticipation worse. I knew those things would hurt bad if he decided to put ‘effort’ behind them.

Not once during the day did Q allude to his plans with the switches. Nor did he play his Dom card, and starting playing me into subspace. So, instead of sitting at his feet, I sat in my chair, or at the computer – just waiting.

At 6, Q turned on the nighttime Nascar race, and we settled into our chairs to watch it. As we both love racing, this was a nice diversion, for the moment. But by 7, with nothing mentioned about the switches that kept taunting me with every visit to the bathroom, the butterflies were starting to pound in my stomach.

About 7:30, as we were watching the race, I mentioned to Q about having the opportunity for ‘spankomercials’, hoping, of course, that there wouldn’t be any long ‘red flag’ episodes in the race, and thinking that maybe what he had planned was more for fun.

Q then turned to me and stated, “I think we have something a lot more serious planned for this evening,” with a stern look in his eyes. I then knew, without any more questioning, what type of spanking that he was indeed planning for the night. This was to be a reckoning for the ‘incident’ past (I have mentioned in previous posts), and the butterflies in my stomach began a panicked flight.

It had been over two weeks since the discussion/incident came up (my guilt made it seem more like four – and his general silence concerning it was adding to my anxiety). And Q had let me slowly stir in my guilt, teasing around me with only fun and non-serious spankings. But I had a feeling that he had finally wrapped his head around the issue, and decided how to deal with me/it.

Around 9 Q commented, “We really don’t have to watch the race. Why don’t you go get the cuffs and prepare the bed. While you are there, get the switches out of the water and lay them out on a towel to dry.”

“Yes sir,” I said quietly and respectfully as I moved to the bedroom to carry out his wishes.

GULP. Cuffs. Now I really had more of an idea of what was ahead. This was not going to be an average discipline spanking. He expected this to be severe enough to need the cuffs.

Yet, in a small part of my head, it was comforting that he was allowing me the option of the cuffs. If he indeed planned a severe punishment, this was the easiest way for me to handle it. At least I didn’t have to worry about jerking or moving the wrong way, and getting accidentally hit in a more painful spot, and I wouldn’t have to focus any concentration on trying to keep still.

I prepared the bed and bedroom as he had asked and returned to the den. As he was still sitting, I sat down again as well.

10:00 came and went with no further indication of movement as we watched the race. Of course by now, the race is down to the last 30 laps, and it looks to be a good finish, so we were glued. But the butterflies were still in escape mode, pounding away in my stomach. I couldn’t completely push what was coming to the back of my mind.

By 10:30, the race is over, and Q turns off the TV. “Ready?” he asks with a smile, looking over at me.

“Nope,” I replied with a sheepish and shaky smile, but I gave him my hand and let me lead me to the bedroom, acknowledging my submission to his decision.

As I go to the bathroom, I am thinking to myself that I really don’t want this, but we need it and I need it to be at least started, if not over. At this point I don’t know if this is just a start in dealing with the incident, or if this spanking will allow us to indeed put it behind us.

Granted, it started/occurred over four years ago, but we were now a DD household and I had to pay the consequences accordingly, because my confessions came afterwards. This was by my choice. So my mind starts thinking of a story I have read, about a girl just handling a severe punishment on stroke at a time, and I make a decision to try and do just that. One at a time and I will get through this. And I/we will be better for it.

Q has me lean over the bed in the position he wants me, so that he can measure the ropes/cuffs for the proper length. He asked me if I have relieved myself, and then starts cuffing me. I am now, in an absolute total position of submission to his will, and I bury my face in the pillow. I feel pale, small, and scared.

He walks to my side and grabs my hair, making me look him in the face. “Why are you getting this spanking?” he asks sternly.

It took me by surprise as to how ‘speechless’ I actually became at that moment. I stammered a semi-coherent relevant answer, adding that I knew I deserved probably much more than he would ever be willing or able to deliver and that I was ready for whatever he deemed necessary.

Q then stated back to me, exactly what disappointed him about the issue. That I hadn’t asked his permission (it was a permission issue) or told him about it for almost four years, and that actually gave me better insight into what was bothering him about the whole thing.

“No safe words tonight,” Q stated firmly looking me directly in the eyes, as he then pulled out a strip of duct tape to place over my mouth (we don’t have a ball gag, and fabric tends to dry my mouth out too bad), loosening it just enough in several places to facilitate breathing heavily, but still help to mute my cries. This further reinforced just how seriously he felt about this issue.

Now, I am truly scared (as Q intended I’m sure), and thinking about everything. Then I just told myself once again that I could get through whatever just dealing with one stroke at a time, and I kept trying to repeat this to myself.

(Side note: after this, the adhesive from the duct tape was difficult to get off my mouth, so we don’t recommend using it. We will be getting a ball gag).

Q then walked over to the tool box and I saw that he had pulled out the big heavy oak school paddle. As he walked around behind me he rubbed my back a bit and said “I love you,” in a soft tone. He then changed his tone and asked, “Ready?”

I shook my head ‘No’, just because I knew that I would never truly be ready for a punishment of this severity, and knowing that it truly didn’t matter at this point.

“Too bad,” Q answered as the first smack of the paddle connected with my bum and I moaned lightly. (Another promise I had made to myself was to be as quiet as possible to show my acceptance of the punishment – and I truly tried to be) This was followed by six more moderately heavy strokes in quick succession and completed with two hard strokes, and I was already yelping a bit.

“Let those soak in for a minute,” he said as he left the room to check out the noise he had heard (probably the cats getting into something). I am now hoping that he doesn’t used that damned paddle much more because I would end up a bruised mess. And I knew he was just beginning and that I was really lucky to even get this much of a warm up (if you can call it that) and then a short break.

When he returned just a minute or so later, he rubbed my bottom to check the condition the paddle had left it in, and then moved to the switches. Lucky for me, they were always bundled in groups of three or four (that’s what I was told afterwards).

Once Q started on me with the switches, I didn’t even try to keep track of how many because he was truly ‘thrashing’ me hard and thoroughly. He started on my bottom, moved to my thighs, and occasionally on my upper back and shoulders as well (for those of you cringing, yes this is a consent zone and no heavy or non-flexible implements are used here. He generally only strikes here either when he is trying to make a deep impression, or when we are Ds-ing, and he is very careful). And he switched the side he was swinging from occasionally, to even up the marking.

Of the fourteen switches, he used up (shredded) 7 in two different groups. He paused occasionally to trim them (from their original 3ft with the stinging flippy ends) and then to use the thicker remaining ends. According to Q, about 15-20 minutes was spent with the switches. And I remember, crying out around the tape several times, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please stop.” But he didn’t.

By this time I had lost most of my resolve to try and keep quiet and was struggling to remember to deal with it one stroke at a time. And I was holding onto the rope that was attached to the cuffs for dear life, so I wouldn’t hurt my wrists. I could also actually feel him spending his emotions of disappointment on me as well. I was ‘dry’ sobbing (not tears or the deeper sobs that come with them, but the ‘dry’ sobs that a hard spanking will elicit).

Q then walked back around to the side of the bed and grabbed my hair, making me look him in the eye again, so he could check ‘where’ I was at. He then verbally repeated his disappointment with my behavior. At this point, this alone, almost brought the tears – but then I felt my defiant streak kick in a bit.

So he let my head fall back on the pillow, and returned to my backside with the big bathbrush. By this time I figured that my butt was probably a bloody mess. But it apparently wasn’t too bad because Q laid into me hard with the bathbrush for another 60++. I was getting pretty close to tears by now, and could feel my body resigning itself to the punishment. I was finally just lying there, and not pulling on the restraints, at least not much.

However, I had at some point during the beginning with the bathbrush, actually pulled the rope holding one of the ankle cuffs loose. But by the end, I was actually keeping my foot on the ground, so there was no need for Q to tie it back down.

Q then pulled out the punishment strap for around 30. I think that he may have thought that it wasn’t working because, at this point, my yelps had subsided because of pure acceptance of the spanking.

So he switched to the leather flogger, using it purely on my shoulders/upper back, and hard. When he uses this technique, it stings like hell – and this time he didn’t let up. Any other time I would have safe-worded out of it because of fear of what it was actually doing. But I have learned to trust his judgment, (especially after today), and was given no such option this time. (He likes this one on my back, because he can swing it with the right flick and little effort and elicit a lot of screams, which note a major impact – and it doesn’t leave hardly a mark).

After just a couple of minutes under this flogging technique, the tears came. Not in a gush, just a slow eruption coupled with the change in the sobbing from ‘dry’, to a deeper sob. Q noticed the change, but continued for a bit more, to let me work through it.

Then he shifted back to the bathbrush and as he did, surprisingly, I could hear what seemed to be light sobs coming from him as well.

After about 20 moderate spanks with the BB, he dropped it and brought the arnica over to rub on me, and then some lotion, while I continued to sob into the pillow. I was so tender at this point, that even his gentle rubbing hurt. After carefully caring for my backside, he then quickly released the cuffs, and we cried in each others arms for a long time, telling each other how much we loved each other.

I finally had my tears, that we had been seeking for so long. They weren’t dramatic, and they weren’t out of control sobbing from way down deep, but they were tears – and very cathartic nonetheless.

And I deeply and sincerely thanked him for giving me just what I needed and for always being there for me and fulfilling those needs. I realized at that point, that his being HOH to my ‘tough as nails’ is really difficult for him because he is such a natural empath. Even though he is a sensual sadist, the DD role is a tough one for him to tackle, but I am so grateful that he does so willingly.

And he agrees, that he likes the positive results that he is seeing, and believes it is worth it, even though it is difficult at times.

At this point, I wanted to look at my backside, which I was sure was hamburger – at least from what I had felt on the receiving side.

I was shocked. Yes, it was a deep crimson with stripes and wrap stripes on the thighs and a few stripes on the back, and some bruising. But I fully expected it to be bloody from the switches and the duration they were used, but it wasn’t (in fact, Q said he likes the well prepared switches because they don’t leave too much in the way of marking, especially bruising – YIPES). Q said the only blood was from the minute capillaries, which often occurs when he uses the big holed oak school paddle like he did. And these had already closed up. Looking at my backside after this thrashing/spanking, dramatically increased my already astronomical trust level with Q. I no longer even feel the need for a safeword.

After I had checked myself out, and relieved my bladder, we then crawled into bed. It was well after midnight, so he wished me a Happy Mother’s Day. I know most people would think I am crazy (and they are probably right), but I can’t think of a better Mother’s Day present than to have the catharsis and the closeness to each other that those tears brought.

We spent the rest of the night with lots of cuddling and love.

In retrospect, what is amazing to me is how bad I really feel when I truly know that I have let him down, deeply, yet not realized it earlier. And, amazing how one little ‘lie of omission’ can create that disappointment and you not even realize the depth of it until the spanking has commenced, walls are down, and emotions are in free flow. This is truly the reason why this lifestyle is so great for us. It’s our tool to break down those ‘natural’ barriers (we’ve unfortunately been very good at these in the past) we all tend to put up from time to time, therefore bringing us much closer emotionally.

Testing Switches

2005-05-09T04:04:00.000-05:00

Friday evening came and after having 10 roofers pounding above my head all day, Q offered to take me out for dinner after he showered. The kid had already abandoned me to go over to a friends earlier because of a headache from the noise (he has hyper-sensitive hearing anyway) actually giving us an extra evening alone together.

I had collected the dozen (plus a couple extra) switches as instructed, and had 2/3rds prepared. (I know you are probably supposed to collect and prepare on the same day, but I just don’t get the opportunity of extended periods of time alone to do a task like this) I left them sitting in a bucket of water in our shower, to keep them supple.

Q was very pleased with what he saw – and that I followed instructions without chickening out (boy I thought about it tho). After he showered, he decided that he needed to test a couple of them out (and intimidate me for what was yet to come on Sat as well – yep he can be evil).

I looked towards the ceiling, indicating that there were still roofers afoot, and he said that they wouldn’t hear us over the noise anyway. I wasn’t sure, coz I can squeal pretty loud.

After picking two different ones, (one thicker and sturdier, and the other with a long whippy tip that I hadn’t yet sufficiently de-nubbed), Q pushed me over the bed, dropped my jeans to my ankles, slid my shirt up and started swishing them in the air over my head.

Then came the first ‘shwick’ to my butt. I jumped with the stinginess and concentrated pain in a narrow point, but it wasn’t too bad – but then Q was just ‘testing’. Then came about six more – fast and harder – with the thinner one. It had me yelping quickly – especially when it wrapped. The wrapping from these is at least ten times worse than the actual strike. Then the tip broke off of this one, so Q set it aside for later use and grabbed the thicker one.

Five more quick, light to moderate strokes with it, and Q decided that was enough testing. The way these hurt when used lightly - by comparison - I was starting to twitch as to what was to come on Saturday.

He had his quick evaluation and liked what he saw, especially the stripes on my bum. So he dropped his pants and slid up to me with his now engorged cock, sliding his fingers into my now dripping labia (yeah, no matter what the 'hurt' factor, I still usually get sopping wet).

He then rolled me over onto my back and started licking and sucking on my freshly washed pussy, getting a snack while giving me a couple of O’s. Then he rolled me back over and started to enter me.

I made a mild (very mild) protest because of the roofers around, but that didn’t hold water with him and he slid into me hard and fast, making me cum almost immediately.

After thrusting together for about 15 minutes with me leaned over the bed, and several O’s later, he guided me up fully onto the bed, with my knees spread apart, but feet still together between his knees, and shoulders down. This position allows me to reach and massage his balls whilst he his thrusting into me, and allows him to spank my butt as well.

Another 10 minutes of hot hard fucking, a little hand spanking, and several more O’s, Q reaches his climax. After he begins to soften, he rolled over on his back, and I proceeded to clean ‘us’ off of him. When he was sufficiently clean, I then went to the bathroom to clean myself up as well.

By this time it is 8 o’clock. The roofers were cleaning up for the day and told us they would be back tomorrow to finish. After they left we went out to eat. It was just Wendy’s, but it was still nice. What amazes me is how quiet it is to actually eat in at a fast food restaurant (only four other couples), but when you go to a ‘nice’ restaurant these days it is always so noisy (10 TV’s blaring, radios, people yelling to be heard over them, etc). Makes me want to go out to decent fast food more often instead of the ‘nice’ places.

By the time we got back home, we were both tired (from the week), and decided to go to bed early. Guess we are just getting old. But we also knew the roofers would be waking us early as well.

Sitting on the toilet, I had the perfect view of the bucket of switches, which seemed to be taunting meas to what was to come for Saturday.

Wednesday Caning

2005-05-06T14:57:00.000-05:00

Ya know, I usually hate it when Q does the quick rat-a-tat-tat with the cane because it is so stingy and ouchie. But tonight, for the most part, I actually enjoyed it.

We actually got a short window of opportunity (after convincing his dad to finally leave) to do some spanking while our son was out for the evening. So I asked Q for a spanking (I am a really needy pain-slut when I am PMS, but I usually don’t feel like asking for it – Q hasn’t quite learned how to read me in this sitch yet)

I suggested the cane for quicker results (to make more efficient use of limited time). He obliged and ordered me to the bedroom to strip, get out the cane, and get in position.

Usually, when Q starts with the cane I perceive it as very ouchy and stingy. I don’t really think he started much lighter than usual, but I wasn’t perceiving the ‘ouch’ factor. But then maybe he had a different agenda. He can be sneaky like that.

I can’t really give you an accurate ‘guess’ as to how many strokes with the cane I received, but I can say it was somewhere around 100. Now, these weren’t all full-blown hard strokes. In fact, only about 3 could probably be even classed as hard (because I only have three small wrap marks).

Q started with a few light-moderate strokes, and then started what I call his rat-a-tat-tatting with the cane. Usually, his RTT’s have me squealing because they come so fast and stingy. But, for whatever reason, not this night.

So Q would RTT a bit and then intersperse a few light-moderate or maybe a moderate stroke. It wasn’t long until I exploded into orgasm (Q enjoys this as much as anything). Then he continued some more, tapping between my thighs to move my legs back apart.

Then he started spanking my labia, sometimes slow and harder, other RTT, then back to slow and steady, til I had another orgasm.

He finished with a few light-moderate strokes, and that was the end of the spanking.

While this was quite enjoyable, I really hate to say this, but it wasn’t totally what I needed. You girls know how it is when you just really need a hard spanking if for no other reason than the stress relief it allows you.

So, plans are set for the weekend (if mood or some other factor of life doesn’t interrupt), for me to get my first ‘switching/birching’. I never know exactly what is in his head, so he usually surprises me with his agenda at the time. I kind of think he is planning a Ds evening.

However, I will try to respectfully express my need to him – without de-railing what he wants to do, that I really need a hard stress-buster in addition to whatever fun plans he may have (and for all I know, his plans may not be for just fun).

Hopefully, next week, I will have some juicy 'tails' to tell, and you will 'see' a much saner and calmer Jayda in my posts (gawd I hate it when I get this needy - I just do the disjointed rambling thing).

Kissing Lexan

2005-05-05T22:27:00.000-05:00

Even though no one has given me any advice :-( on collecting switches (or comments) I will still post the rest of last weekends events today.

Saturday evening, Q worked at being a Dom, albeit half-heartedly, so I spent a couple of hours on my knees servicing him, but couldn’t really get into the headspace we were both looking for. This was in part due by reactions to the damned MSG the Chinese place decided to add to their food. By the time we went to bed, we were both pretty tired and our libidos just weren’t at their prime.

However, once we actually got into bed and started cuddling, the fire started returning. As we were fondling each other, Q reached over and grabbed the backscratcher and started smacking the area of my bottom that he could reach. I quickly obliged him by rolling over on all fours and scooting for his easy access.

He replied to this by pulling the lexan paddle out of the drawer and using it. It wasn’t long until I was wanting more and harder so I began to push into the paddle strokes. And then Q inserted his fingers in me and I exploded into orgasm. A few minutes later, yet another orgasm.

By this time Q is hard and ready, so he guided me into the all-fours position that he wanted me in and entered me, eliciting yet another orgasm. Just a few minutes of heavy thrusting later, and he reaches over for the lexan paddle and starts smacking me (where he could reach) while he is fucking me.

He got his technique and timing down perfect for paddling and fucking quickly, building us both to a perfect rhythm. I honestly can’t tell you how long we stayed like that or exactly how many orgasms I had (lost count at 10-12), or even how many times he spanked me (it was pretty constant), but by the time Q let himself cum, I was dripping with sweat, gasping for air, and the sheets were totally soaked. IT WAS AMAZING, and I was thoroughly exhausted.

Can you tell I’m looking forward to the next time we do this? I think I have found my new exercise plan. Even if I do have to change the sheets because of the sweat.

Even after the wonderful fun spanking, I still feel a need for more – like there is unfinished business. But Q’s mood rules for the moment. And like any good brat, I am sure to regret what I wish for (at least to some degree WHILE it is happening - WEG).

An assignment to collect switches

2005-05-05T00:32:00.000-05:00

Thought I would make a quick post here, before I post the rest of Sat. That way maybe some of you good people could give me some advice.

We had a discussion this evening about our Ds/DD lifestyle. We were mostly talking about comfort levels, and what we wanted to push as far as new things. This mainly centered around different implements and settings, and noise levels of implements, and what level I thought I was ready to push to.

In this discussion two major scary implements came up. First (shudder) was the electrical cord and how much quieter it would be. Second was switches. We have tried neither, thus far.

So Q decided that Friday, I am to collect and prepare a dozen willow switches for him/us for Saturday. This is where I seek advice from experienced people out there (Patty, you come to mind here).

Any advice that anyone could give me on size (length & diameter) and preparation would be appreciated.

So, barring any interference from life, looks like I am in for my first switching/birching this weekend. Funny, while I am a bit apprehensive, I am also looking forward to it, in a timid sort of way.

Thanks in advance.

Mood Problems

2005-05-04T16:32:00.000-05:00

I know I led up to a long weekend alone, which looked to be a lot of wonderful fun. But amazingly, neither Q, nor I, were in very amorous moods – we were more subdued and quiet. Lousy timing for a long weekend alone.

We spent the majority of our time refinishing the oak woodwork in our house. We are trying to get it ready to sell (to buy something smaller and in the country), and the woodwork in this house is spectacular and will be one of the key selling points. But refinishing it is a MAJOR project.

Friday evening we had some wonderful vanilla sex.

Early Saturday evening, Q decided that my bottom needed a short, but hard, workout. So he wasted no time warming me up. He pulled out the oak school paddle and gave me 10 really hard ones. Just one hard one with this beast has me tearing at the sheets and yelping.

He didn’t waste any time between implements, pulling out the Whippy Gear and swinging it full strength, on an already very ouchy bum. After about 30 with it, Q announced that that was enough for now, he was hungry, and that we were going out to eat at our favorite Chinese buffet. But there would be more to come, later. So I got to squirm all through dinner, in hopes for a much needed spanking yet to come.

More on the rest of the evening tomorrow.

PMS and falling behind

2005-05-04T00:30:00.000-05:00

Sorry, I haven't made a post here. But I am PMS and bitchy (and yes I probably need a good hard spanking).

I actually have two posts to finish writing and put up here, but you will have to be patient and wait a couple of days.

What is amazing to me, is that I never had real PMS problems until I started entering menopause. So I am really bumfuzzled on how to deal with it.

Thankfully, Q & I have found that spanking works quite well. Now the key is to find alone time when Q is in the mood to administer it.

Now, I will go away and try to finish up at least one of the posts for you readers.

Tuesday Sex

2005-04-27T02:07:00.000-05:00

Today was yummy fun around here.

I am leaving tomorrow to stay with my mom for a couple of days (she is in a wheelchair and dad is going fishing). And then coming back to 3 ½ days of ‘no kids’ as they are going camping.

So Q came in playful, in a Dom way. First, I admitted to being a bit dingy (had been on the run all day), and then to being bratty on the net. This brought out the wooden spatula and he smacked me several times in the kitchen (the boys were out back) in a fun way for being bratty.

As he was working around the house (we are trying to get it ready to sell), I playfully suggested to him that I would like to give him a blow-job, if he was in the mood and didn’t get himself to tired from doing chores this evening.

So Q steps it up by having me address him as ‘Sir’ with every request for the rest of the evening (at least when the kids weren’t within earshot).

So he calls it an early evening, leading us to the bedroom. When he crawls into bed, I immediately reach for his privates, and then adjust myself to give him head. He has an extremely long trigger, so after sucking on his penis and balls for about 30 minutes, I ask him if he would like to fuck my face while I play with/in his asshole.

He immediately agrees to this and we proceed. After lubricating my finger and his butt well, I insert my finger and start playing with his prostate, tickling it lightly. Well, it doesn’t take long with this play for him to give me a load of his delicious cum. By this time, I have already left a huge wet spot on the sheet.

<>When we got up afterwards to get a drink, Q stayed hard. This prompted him to make use of a good thing, and he pulled me over to the edge of the bed and entered me. Four great O’s for me later, and he decides that his knees are tired from standing, and that I need to clean ‘me’ off of him. (I do love the smell of our blended scents)

Afterwards, he gives me yet another O by playing with my tits, pinching and twisting them just right. And Q is hard, yet again.

After another blow-job (and on a weeknight – oh my), we lay awake cuddling and talking and petting on each other. He is just soooo great. I still can’t believe how much more open our communication has become since DD.

We discussed my submission/submissiveness, both reveling in what has happened over the last 8 months. I am so happy with this, and he is happy as well. So look for Q to push me further with it in the future. I know I am looking forward to it.

Now, for the weekend - I am quite sure it is going to be a mix of punishment (dealing with the issue and trying to put my guilts to rest), and play (because of what he started tonight). So next weeks posts could be quite interesting, barring any unforeseen interruptions.

Blog-A-Thon

2005-04-26T14:31:00.000-05:00

Opened up my 'mouth' and jumped into this with Patty. Here are my answers to her questions from this blog-a-thon which was, I believe, started by JaylovesKitty. It bounced from there to submissive sex, and then to Patty.

Thanks to Patty’s deep thought-provoking questions, this may be a long interview so heat up your cup of coffee and here goes:

Tell us about how you told Q that you wanted to be spanked? Was there a precipitating event, or did you just blurt it out after thinking on it for a while?

First I’ll address that there was no precipitating event. Fun spanking kind of evolved (very slowly) starting probably about 10 years ago. I don’t remember what exactly was said (something along the lines of cleaning out our closet for a garage sale and he came across an old belt that he couldn’t wear anymore and the conversation advanced from there, so he kept the belt). This may have been precipitated by the fact that we both enjoyed the movie “The Story of O” (thus laying the groundwork, or feeding the subliminal need, for both our kinky fantasies at this point).

It was probably a couple of years later he actually pulled it out and used it on me for fun. I realized that it turned me on, but couldn’t reconcile that within myself (much less tell anyone else) that it did. Plus we had young kids underfoot all the time. So nothing progressed at this point. Over the next few years, he spanked me lightly during sexual interludes maybe twice.

About five years ago, I actually asked him to spank me because I wanted to see if I truly liked what I had been thinking about. Given the rare opportunity of an empty house, he did spank me. At this point I think we both realized that it was a turn-on. I also realized that the endorphins, etc., released during spanking actually seemed to help me with my pain management (fibromyalgia – an arthritic type ailment).

It was several months later, and I really needed to have a good cathartic cry for various reasons, that I asked him to spank me again. Only this time I wanted him to spank me hard and try to make me cry. And I also wanted to test my theory on the general pain abatement. (I had been on various prescription drug cocktails for several years (for the fibrymyalgia), that had the unfortunate side effect of suppressing my emotions). So he spanked me – but no crying.

At this point Q had concerns about the marks/bruising, as well as what my emotional/mental state was. So we had lots of long talks about this until he felt a little better.

It was probably another 6 months before he spanked me again. By this time I had found the ‘spanking world’ on the internet and was enjoying my fantasies vicariously by surfing porn.

Because of various life issues, spanking still stayed repressed until about 2 years ago. He knew what I was surfing, but we just never acted on anything. Finally, I had managed to clean all the drugs that the Drs had me on out of my system, and get my FM under control using naturopathic and Native American methods. I was beginning to feel more like a functioning human again.

Then one day he acted on this (I was being playfully bratty), and gave me one helluva hand spanking which we both enjoyed immensely. From there fun spankings progressed into our lives, but it was only once or twice a month – and I was the one that had to ask for it most of the time.

Now that spanking was finally in our bedroom on occasion, I was feeling spanking deprived most of the time. That is when my surfing chanced me across the Taken in Hand website (Feb 2004). Life got really interesting (and fun) from that point.

Here, I was able to read volumes, come to terms with and face up to my desires, and realize I wasn’t the only one out there so I probably wasn’t a sick twisted pervert. I was also able to analyze my needs, and explain it to Q. So I started a printing fest, of stuff I wanted him to read. This all helped him immensely, and put his mind at ease on several issues.

I kept reading and researching (even finding articles relating to the endorphin release during spanking) devouring everything I could find. And sharing with Q what I thought was appropriate for him/us at the time.

August rolls around, and here comes the biggest request I made to Q. I asked him to bring DD and Ds into our lives (again printing lots of articles for him). This was a big request for me, because I had always been the controlling one, the in charge person in our household – so it took a whole lot of hard thinking on my part before I could even find the nerve to bring it up. As I looked back on our 20 years together, I realized that this is what Q deserved, and that I needed and wanted it.

After a couple of weeks to read and talk over things, Q agreed. And I think most of the rest of the story is here on this blog.

Other than spanking, what is your most favorite sex fantasy, and would you/have you ever tried to live it? If yes how did it go, if no, why not?

I guess it would be a rape fantasy (and I know a lot of people will freak about this). I think the fantasy has more to do with having all control taken from me and being completely dominated, than anything else. (I have been a rape victim in my life, twice – and the fantasy just isn’t the same).

And yes, we have acted on it once. Q had a bit of a hard time at first, but pulled it off quite well. It was wonderful, and even cathartic and healing of past emotions. We haven’t had the desire to act on it since – but the one occasion several years back was mind-blowing, and I think actually helped to direct me to my needs for Ds in our lives.

Today, my fantasies focus more around being totally dominated, and Q is living them out with me more and more.

Actually, I think that since spanking has entered our lives, my fantasies have become very minimal. At least at this point.

Have you ever had an orgasm just from spanking? If yes describe the whole experience for us, if not, describe the spanking encounter that you think might do it for you.

Oh yes, and the first one was mind-blowing. I have blogged about it in an earlier entry. It both did (and didn’t because of what I had read from others) surprise me. Q was fun spanking me and realized that I was close by my humping of his leg, so he just continued spanking me until the orgasm exploded. Honestly, it excited and tickled both of us. Now he just laughs at what a little ‘pain-slut’ I am.

The spanking encounter that might do it? – Any spanking encounter. In fact Q has to be careful when the spanking is not for fun, to watch my reactions to keep it NOT for fun, and to keep it at a level of pain that does not transcend to pleasure for me.

You and Q practice some DD within your D/s lifestyle, so, have you ever been soundly punished for something? If yes, what was it and describe the punishment you received. If no, what do you think would get you the worst punishment of your life, and what would that be like?

Oh yes. When we first started DD, we set up a few rules to facilitate our adjustment into DD. A few are still in place, but these aren’t the things that really get me punished harshly now.

Probably, the first actual hard-to-take punishment was when I was an absolute tempered bitch with his dad. It wasn’t that I wasn’t right, or even deserved to be the way I was, the punishment resulted from the fact that I ‘hurt’ Q with my actions. This was a really long ordeal, mostly with the belt, until he was really exhausted. In our talk afterwards, he made me realize why he was so ‘hurt’, and this one has really stuck with me – bringing some things into focus for me that would not have happened if we hadn’t introduced this dynamic in our marriage.

For us, a hard spanking, brings down some emotional barriers that facilitate much better communication and understanding of what is really bothering us.

Right now, I am undergoing a long punishment (see my most recent blog entries), that is probably more for me than for him, in that I am trying to overcome some serious guilt issues, of a crime past.

What would get me the worst punishment of my life? Being blatantly dishonest with Q about something that affected a lot of peoples lives. As I don’t think I could ever do something this bad, I can’t even fathom what sadistic evils that Q would pull from the back of his mind to punish me with. (Whipping post comes to mind here, but I think that is due to Patrick’s stories)

Would/has Q ever spanked you in public or in front of friends or family? How did/would this make you feel? Have you ever fantasized about a public spanking? (sure hope this doesn't duplicate question 2, if it does lemme know & I'll come up with a new #5.)

Nope, never been spanked in front of anyone. Q has threatened to haul me to the bedroom when we had people around over the holidays – and as he put it “To hell with what anyone hears”. But luckily, his warning straightened up my behavior (stress induced temper tantrums), enough that I didn’t get spanked until everyone was gone. That is the closest to being spanked ‘in front of’ anyone has ever gone.

However, we do have a new couple (old friends), that we have found out recently are into Ds and spanking. (It’s really nice to have people, in the flesh, to talk to about this). And I am quite sure that if I did something to provoke him, Q would not hesitate to spank me in front of them. So I try extra hard to behave when we are with them. I guess the absolute embarrassment factor keeps me in line.

I know I would be terribly embarrassed by a ‘public’ display of this intimate part of our lives (sharing on the blog doesn’t quite seem as public because you don’t put faces of people that you know in real life to it). Not to mention, feeling really horrid by doing something that upset Q enough to go to that level.

But yes, if provoked enough, I think Q would spank me in public.

Nope, no public spanking fantasies either, although I do enjoy reading others stories about them.

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Sunday Spankus Interuptus

2005-04-25T17:27:00.000-05:00

Sunday morning came and we both woke up and cuddled for a long while. Sometimes it is just nice to cuddle. It also gives us time to talk and share as well.

After awhile, we actually got up and took care of the morning duties (bathroom, feed cats before they tear down the door, coffee, brushing teeth, etc.), then we decided to crawl back into bed and cuddle some more.

We stayed there quite awhile, just talking and enjoying each others company. But it wasn’t long until hunger won the battle.

After eating, I was contemplating going out to our friends and helping with the clean-up. But before I went out there, we decided I needed yet another good spanking, and the kid was still sound asleep from folding papers the night before. Kind of a ‘take advantage of the opportunity’ and push me one more step closer to being able to forgive myself spanking.

So we went to the bedroom. While Q was relieving himself, I put the foam under the base of the door for sound insulation, just in case. When he came out of the bathroom and I wasn’t yet stripped, he growled at me.

I smarted off back to him, “Working on it, working on it,” as I quickly started to disrobe.

He didn’t take to that too well and immediately set me in my place, demanding respect and submission. At his direction, I got the bed ready (covers pulled up and out of the way), and pillows in place and pulled out the toy box. I then got into position and waited, while he went outside to adjust the water on the lawn.

Q’s first choice of implements for the day was the heavy oak school paddle. Nothing like starting a spanking off intense, right? He was actually pretty easy with it, thank goodness, but it still hurt like hell on my already bruised (from 12 hours previously) derriere. 8 hard licks with it and he pulled out the glycerin mix and sprayed me down. This did not bode well for what was to come.

He then pulled out the big heavy leather paddle and started swinging hard. This thing, when Q swings for punishment, packs one hell of a sting and an impact which combines for a undescribable level of pain – and it was now impacting an already very tender bottom, and thus burning like hell. Shortly after he started I was beginning to wish I hadn’t agreed to this, this morning (not like I really had a choice) and I am pretty vocal with every swing. I am still being pretty good (keeping my legs on the floor), but not having much success keeping from standing up, and he is having to hold me down.

After about 40, he decides to move to the heavy metal spatula that he now likes so well. He starts focusing on the lighter marked or unmarked areas of my bum with rapid fire intensity. At this point I am kind of rocking into my pillow as I am yelping. This seems to help me keep from standing. After about 60ish, we here something at the front door and stop to listen.

Q gets up to go check, and it ends up being our oldest, coming over to work on some stuff. Obviously, at this point, our spanking session has come to an abrupt halt. But I stay in position anyway until Q comes back in and puts a ‘formal’ end to it by letting me get up and get dressed. We hugged and kissed, and joined the boy in the kitchen. Who knows what/if he heard, but he is grown.

Wow, is my bum ever stingy right now. A second spanking within 24 hours definitely adds to the residual stinging of the bottom (leaving a whole lot more ‘kisses’ from Q that I get to enjoy each time I sit down).

We'll keep working through this until I find closure. I am just so happy to have Q and that he is happy to work me/us through this in the method best suited to our chosen lifestyle, however unorthodox that may seem to others.

Reckoning – The first steps

2005-04-25T00:31:00.000-05:00

Today I sit here on blissfully sore buns as I type. But I welcome each nuance of pain as I wriggle, because it only serves to remind me just how much Q really does love me.

Well, I told you I had blown things out of proportion on the ‘incident’ (I’ll just refer to it as that from now on, because I won’t share any further details). Q took everything quite well, considering, and by Saturday night he had totally forgiven me.

He even made me face a fear from it Saturday evening by taking me to a small get-together. Bless him for knowing me so well and making me do at least one thing I needed to do.

I may be forgiven as far as he is concerned, but actually forgiving myself for keeping it secret from him is a whole ‘nother story. That step may take awhile. And a whole lot of harsh spankings.

But after talking to this amazingly wonderful and understanding husband of mine, he agrees that I do probably need this until I get to the point that I can forgive myself – and of course, has agreed to ‘step up to the plate’ and swing until we get me there.

I really don’t deserve this wonderful man, but omigawd am I ever glad I have him.

After returning home from the get-together (another ruse of a false page – gee, I really like this pager), and settling in for the night Q stepped up alright.

I thought that he might be to tired for any spanking, so after I brushed my teeth, I just crawled into bed, giving him an excuse to do the same. But that wasn’t to be.

After he finished brushing he walked right over and pulled out the tool/toy box and sat it on the bed, laughing at my look of ‘trepidation’ as he called it. We both knew it was needed (and even the reason for the page and leaving early), but honestly, no one wants to face this kind of spanking. And I knew he was tired, and not totally into it as well – but the spanking commenced anyway.

Q pointed me to where he wanted me on the bed, and I pulled a pillow up underneath my hips to raise them a bit, and then one over to my head for me to bury my face into and chew on as necessary. And I willed myself to be as still as possible – not wriggle, not lift my legs, and not stand up – so as to make things easier for him. (I actually did a really good job. To the best of my memory, I only raised one leg a small bit 2-3 times, and I only raised up about 6-8 times and he only had to push me back down 3 of those. This is really good for me, even though it was a Major effort on my part. (Afterwards he told me he thought he wasn’t getting it right because I was so still)

Since he doesn’t like me (at least most of the time) to see what he is using (I guess he’s afraid of ‘loosing’ a favorite implement), I buried my face in the pillow (he filled in the implements later) and steeled myself for what was to come.

In his usual style, there was no hand-spanking or warm-up of any type. He started hard immediately. Just the first spank with the heavy metal spatula had me yelping. After about a dozen, he paused to place the coolness of the metal implement against my now burning cheeks for a sensation contrast, and then continued spanking for 30 or more with it.

He then changed to the Whippy Gear paddle, stopping to check the condition of my bottom, and tease it a bit with his fingers, before starting brutally hard with it. While this implement can be pleasant, it can also be brutal in Q’s hands. 60 swats or so later I am beginning to get a little panicky and I think Q notices this in my breathing (before DD/Ds I would have safeworded by then). So he paused again, to check my condition and also to apply the glycerin mix because I was starting to get rubbery. This allowed me to catch my breath and get back in control a bit. Another 40 (and some cursing screams from me) and he pauses to switch implements again.

Now he swears it was just the wooden spatula he used to concentrate on unmarked areas, but that’s really not what it felt like (funny what the mind does to us in this position). After at least 50 with this, I am really close to finding the tears I need, but he changes again. (We talked about this afterwards – he is trying so hard to learn to read all the signals – and we decided on a hand signal to let him know that it is OK to go ahead and continue because I am almost there).

I managed to take a deep breath before he laid into my shoulders – hard – with the leather flogger. This took me a bit by surprise, as did the pain, but I welcomed it, in search of the release of tears. But, alas, the hard flogging didn’t last long enough (20ish). By the time I was again at the precipice, Q changed his technique and moved down to my bum and legs and the lighter strokes became a more sensual experience (20ish). (We talked about this too, afterwards, so he would have an understanding of my reactions better) He finished with about ten – hard ones again – on my shoulders, before sliding his hand between my legs to check my wetness.

The stress relief for him had obviously worked, because he was now turned on.

When he spread my legs and slid his cock into me, it was a bit of a surprise, and a very pleasant one as well. Normally I would have cum almost immediately, but we hadn’t yet reached the point of releasing my guilt, so I couldn’t quite reach even that release yet.

But it wasn’t long until Q’s magic had me there. And then again. And then he rolled me over on my side, legs tucked up, and re-entered me there, where we could look in each others faces. That did it, I had a more explosive orgasm, and then another, before the ache in his feet made him pull out and crawl on the bed for me to give him a blow job to cap off our interlude.

As we were snuggling afterwards, Q let me cry in his arms, telling me how much he loved me and that yes, he truly forgave me (I don’t deserve this, but man-o-man how I love him for it). After sniffling for a while, we then talked for another hour, getting through a lot of little things in our DD/Ds relationship dynamic.

I really love these talks afterward. It’s like somehow, at that point with all the barriers down, I can verbalize my feelings and needs better (but, that is what this is all about, isn’t it). As I told him at that point, I am looking for the release of the guilt so that I can again feel like I deserve his love.

It may take a bit (or it may happen tomorrow), but we will work through this and get to the catharsis I need both from the guilt release, and the crying barrier.

So stick around. There are lots more spankings to come, I am sure. If not from this, then our wonderful DD/Ds lifestyle as well. Because I know my inner bitch won't stay tamed forever. Besides that, Q just enjoys spanking me too much (hooray).

LOVING Q

2005-04-23T00:35:00.000-05:00

I love this wonderful man that captured my heart and carried me off to married bliss over 20 years ago.

I LOVE MY Q WITH A DEPTH AND SINCERITY FROM THE VERY DEPTHS OF MY HEART AND SOUL.

So deeply, in fact, it is a sweetly painful bliss to know that he is my life, my every reason to live and breathe every single day.

My wish for every reader is to find something at least 1/100th as wonderful as what we have found. It will make you incredibly happy for the rest of your lives. I can't say anymore. It is toooooo powerful for words.

I was right

2005-04-23T00:27:00.000-05:00

In that I was blowing it all out of proportion in my mind. I usually do. Things are fine, as I said they would be.

But, Q still has to wrap his head around this issue and put it to rest, however he sees best for him.

After talking, I know I will be asking for at least one very serious spanking to help me assuage my own guilt for not sharing immediately. God, I hate keeping secrets (first time is the last for sure) from him, and I kept this one way too long so I have a lot of built up guilt.

Oh well, none of us are perfect (least of all me), but we have to deal with things and just move forward.

Have I said lately how ABSOLUTELY WONDEFULLY AMAZING Q is?

The rest of the week

2005-04-21T22:51:00.000-05:00

By Monday, I was still pretty worked up and still horny from the weekend. I was re-writing the events, and really got myself in a lather, so I called Q at work while the youngest was out of the house, and ask his permission to give myself an externally stimulated orgasm with the vibrator. Thankfully, he said yes, laughing that that was not the typical phone call he usually received at work.

Well, this week, Q had a blow-job on Tuesday, and another short one on Thursday. This has been intermixed with his relentless teasing of me just to the point of O, and then stopping. Finally, Thursday, he allowed me two orgasms while I was teasingly dancing above him while he exercised his back on the floor.

I know I still have a catch up spanking coming my way. This past weekend was pure fun, mixed in with Q’s re-assertion of his domliness. The catch up will probably happen this weekend.

But, I am also dealing with another issue. I won’t go into any details, but I have kept something from Q for the past five years (and I don’t keep things from him). Don’t jump to conclusions, it isn’t horrible, but it is something, that if shared in the beginning, would have been no big deal.

However, I was convinced at the time that the best thing to do was not to say anything, as it really didn’t affect our daily lives anyway. And I won’t go into any more details. In fact, I am probably blowing the issue all out of proportion. But then, that is the way I am.

What HAS been bothering me, is that I have kept this secret since we started this journey. I had planned on telling Q back in Feb, when his job stress slowed down (didn’t figure he needed anything added to his stress level at the time), but then our lives got in the way.

So now has come the time for me to fess up and spill my guts. So wish me luck.

My biggest problem is my guilt over the fact that I have kept this from him (and also just the fact that I have).

I guess, in trying to be a good submissive, I will confess my error, and ask Q to help us by getting his frustrations with me out by beating my guilt out of me.

Who knows what direction this will lead the weekend. Hopefully, we will have two nights, kid free, to get it all sorted out.

And I know that ‘we’ will be fine, and that I will feel a lot better, no matter what happens.

As much of a wonderful, loving, caring husband that Q is, he does have a bit of a sadistic streak at times. And this may be just the issue that unleashes a bit of that streak that he keeps on a tight leash.

Will keep you posted on what happens.

De-railed, momentarily

2005-04-20T23:42:00.000-05:00

“Clean me off, slut,” Q demands, referring to both his pre-cum and the ample amount of my juices deposited on his cock and balls.

I quickly comply without any hesitation, and for the first time, actually enjoyed not only the taste of our combined juices, but the combined musky scent as well. Now 4-5 years ago, I would have hesitated. Never having been even remotely bi, the taste of my own juices often startled me, and sometimes even turned me off. But not anymore. I lapped at Q greedily, while he again began watching his movie.

It wasn’t ten minutes later, however, that the doorbell rang. I barely hesitated sucking him, having no intention of answering the door. I had a sixth sense about who it might be (a friend of the kids), if it wasn’t a door to door “Save your soul” salesman, so why let them interrupt us.

“Should we answer it?” Q asked.

I replied with an “Uh uh” as best I could with his cock still in my mouth. So we continued. Then the phone rings on the kids line, confirming my suspicions that it is probably one of the kids friends.

Another ten minutes passes with me continuing to suck Q’s cock and balls, and we hear a key being inserted in the deadbolt. We both immediately jumped up and ran to the bedroom – Q put on shorts and I grabbed a robe. And our oldest, and a female friend of both his and our youngest enter the house. (See what happens when you have kids)

Knowing I never wear this robe, and probably seeing the glaze over my eyes, there is no way that at least my son doesn’t know what has been going on.

The friend, M, has left something over here in my youngest son’s room that she needs to pick up before she ships out to basic the next day. Of course, since she is shipping out, they spend a little extra time visiting a bit before they leave. Even though we have been de-railed from the earlier activities, we don’t mind. This girl is almost like an adopted kid, she has spent so much time here over the last 4 years. We say our goodbyes, they leave, and we are alone – again.

Well, during the time I am sitting in my chair visiting with them (maybe 10-15 minutes), I began to shake/quiver lightly. At this point I do not realize what is going on. I am thinking that my blood sugar has gotten a bit low. So I suggest to Q that we have an ice-cream sandwich and rest a bit, and he agrees.

As we are taking this break, the wine we had consumed earlier start to do it’s nasty trick – make us sleepy. I also realize while eating the ice-cream sandwich, that I am still full, so it seems very strange to me that I should be suffering low blood sugar and still be this full. My mind starts working on this concept.

We decide to go to bed, as we had both had a long day, but it wasn’t ten minutes after we had crawled into bed, that Q’s erection returned. We started laughing about how teen-ager-ish this was and how great it is at our age that we still enjoy our sex-life so well.

He then began making love to me. A few great O’s later, Q pulls out and guides me to finish him off orally. Once again, I am reveling in the taste of mixed juices and musky scent and I start to cum.

Realizing this, Q quickly asks, “Did I tell you that you could cum again slut?”

Putting quick restraints on my O, I shake my head no while keeping his cock firmly in my mouth.

Then he says, “OK, cum for me now slut, cum hard with me in your hot little mouth.”

That was all it took to push me over the edge. He then repeated the verbal demands and I came yet another time.

At this point he rolls over so that I can lick his ass, while he continues to stimulate his cock (next to impossible for me to do both from this particular position). As he reaches close to the point of climax, he then pulls me into position to suck him the rest of the way off, letting me drink of his luscious cum, which gives me yet another orgasm.

I lie there and continue to suck him dry, milking all his cum, not wanting to waste a drop. As he begins to go soft, he directs me off of him so that his cock doesn’t get too sore from all the stimulation, and pulls me up into his arms.

A minute or so later it hits me – what had happened when I got the shakes. I had gone into subspace, and this was the ‘let down’ from it. I had read about it, but never experienced it for myself.

I got all excited and shared this fact with him.

“You were pretty well ‘tripped out’,” Q agreed, grinning.

I then lavished all kinds of ‘thank yous’ on him, as we cuddled. He then praised me, telling me how terrific I was as well. We stayed there a bit cuddling and loving on each other, each of us lavishing praise on the other.

I often wondered if I could/would ever reach subspace. I am an extremely difficult hypnosis subject and VERY VERY rarely reach a deep hypnotic state, so I wondered if this would play into subspace as well. Apparently not, thank goodness!!

We both got up at that point, to get a drink. Q made it back to bed before me, and as I returned and started walking around to my side of the bed, he commanded, “Come here you beautiful slut.”

I quickly crawled in on top of him to hug him even more. As I slid down to his side, Q began slapping me playfully on the butt.

I, of course, responded with an, “Mmmmm,” pushing my butt even closer to his reach.

Q then pulled me across his lap, and began really spanking me with his hand. All the while I am continuing to moan and push my butt up to meet the spanks. He then reaches over to the side of the bed and grabs an implement.

Since the toybox was out and I am face down on the bed in the opposite direction, I have no idea what he is using, other than it is a paddle of some type. All I know is that it felt damned good, and I wanted more. So I continue to push my butt closer to the paddle, moaning, and he continues to spank harder and harder. Must have been over 50 spanks.

And then, wham, I have a wonderful, explosive orgasm. So far, the best spanking orgasm I have had since we began this lifestyle.

My butt is now zinging, right along with my clit. “Incredible,” I moan, relaxing into the sensations. “What was that you were using,” I inquired from pure pleasure curiosity.

I could hear the grin in Q’s voice as he answered, “Lexan.”

“NO. Not really. That thing bites, and I didn’t get bit once. That was nice. Couldn’t have been Lexan,” I exclaimed.

“It was,” he said, showing it to me. He then began smacking my ass again, even harder, just to show me.

I definitely wasn’t feeling the ‘bite’ I normally feel from this holey lexan paddle, even at this point. Perhaps I was still in (or back into) a semblance of subspace. 20 or so swats later, I had yet another orgasm.

“Does my good little pain-slut feel better now?” Q inquired, grinning broadly.

“Mmmmm hmmmmm,” I replied, “Incredibly, wonderfully, amazingly, better.”

Q dropped the paddle back into his drawer, and we continued cuddling until we drifted off into a blissful sleep.

And to think - All I had requested from the weekend was some sex and a catch up spanking, and what I got was SO INCREDIBLY WONDERFUL. Thank you, my love.

Guess the catch-up spanking will have to wait for another tale (hehe).

My First Deep Sub-space

2005-04-19T23:38:00.000-05:00

On our way home from the reception, our Saturday Sex-a-thon began. Q started by actually twisting the nipple clamps under my bra on the ride home, again not letting me cum. I thought I was going to dig holes in the floorboard of the car with my heels every time he did this. He thought it was cute.

“Do you realize we have the whole house to ourselves all evening?” Q said, rhetorically on the drive home.

I responded with a nod and an “Mmmmm”, which was all I could vocalize at the time with his hand being on my nipple.

During the reception, Q had served me no less than four huge goblets of wine, which just intensified my general horniness. So by the time we had gotten home, I headed straight to the bathroom, undressing along the way.

By the time I had taken off my bra, Q noticed a missing nipple clamp. “Now that was on in the car, where did it go?”

I had no clue. Apparently it had slipped off and fallen out of my bra as well, because it wasn’t still in the bra.

Stepping into full DOM mode, Q demanded that I find it so I got on my hands and knees and crawled everywhere I had stepped since getting back to the house to no avail (I actually found it in the car the next day). After searching for ten minutes, Q called it off and told me to come to him. When I did, I noticed he was holding the two new nipple clamps with teeth, that he had got a couple of weeks ago.

He then proceeded to take off the one remaining nipple clamp, suck and bite on each nipple, and put the new ones on, even tighter. “This is what happens to girls who loose things,” Q said while doing this, making my knees go totally weak with the impending orgasm.

“Uh uh, don’t you cum yet. I didn’t give you permission cum,” he scolded, forcing me to hold back my O. He then grabbed me by my hair and kissed me long and hard and then moved over to my bedside table to look for something.

By this time, my juices were again trickling down my leg. I had already soaked the pair of panties I had worn to the reception.

I had totally forgotten about an ‘implement’ that I had purchased months earlier and tucked away for when I thought I might be ready for it. It is a heavy, flat, stainless steel spatula, and I had tucked it into the drawer for lack of any place better to put it at the time.

Well, guess what Q found. I quickly confessed, telling him that I was keeping that for when I thought I was ready.

Q snickered, “Since when is that your decision angel,” grabbing my arm and bending me over that side of the bed. “I had thought I would wait to spank you until later, but I think I want to now,” and he began whacking me with that thing.

Man does it ever sting. He had me yelping with the first whack, but it wasn’t but a dozen or so later, I was actually pushing back towards him wanting more. I was desperate to cum.

“No you don’t, not yet,” Q said as he stopped with the spanking, leaving my bum well warmed and quite tingly.

Now in retrospect, I was already slipping deep (well at least deeper than I have ever been) into subspace, although I didn’t realize it at the time, so I don’t really know how bad this implement might really be for a punishment spanking.

Q then pulled me up and led me into the den, telling me to wait while he took care of a few things.

When he comes back in, I get him a drink, and fall on my knees at his feet (C/Am, I now fully ‘feel’ the position you show on your blog). This feels wonderfully natural – where I should be.

Q then puts in one of his favorite ‘dirty’ movies and I begin to give him head. He rubs my head and occasionally pulls on my hair to direct my speed for his pleasure. At some point during this session, I reach down a get a finger full of my own juices, reach up and put it in his mouth, just to show him how wet he is making me. After about 20 minutes he pulls my head up and off of his erection, stopping himself from cumming until later.

He requests another drink, and I quickly get it for him and fall back on my knees at his feet, head bowed. I can’t believe how natural this feels now – this is exactly where I want to be and all I am thinking about is pleasing him.

“Back, slut (this is an endearing term between us)”, Q commands and I quickly take his cock back into my mouth.

Q is still watching the movie while I am sucking his cock, but about 15 minutes later he again pulls my head up. But this time, he turns me around and pushes my hands over on the floor, and crawls into me from behind. “I want to fuck your beautiful, wet pussy, hard, right now,” he says taking me hard.

At this point, I am surprised that I don’t cum the minute he enters me. His long hard cock feels so damned good inside me. But just a few thrusts and I do begin to cum.

When Q feels my response, he grabs my hair and whispers harshly in my ear, “Not yet slut. Not until I tell you to.”

I barely manage to stop the O, but thankfully it was just a minute or so later he was then commanding me to cum.

“Cum for me baby,” Q cooed. And as I began to cum he demanded, “Cum hard for me baby, NOW!”, and I complied, cumming really hard.

This scene repeated several times over the next 15 minutes, then Q pulled out of me, leaving me still wanting more. (Yep, I’m a greedy little slut) He then sits back down in his chair and looks at my breathless form still writhing on the floor.

Now, I am completely out of breath and my mouth is dry from panting so hard, so I ask permission to get a drink of water. After getting a drink, I then return to sitting on my knees at his feet, waiting his command.

Another installment to come…..but a few comments here to encourage me to finish
the evening for you please - I am feeling abandoned

Family events

2005-04-18T15:48:00.000-05:00

Dontcha just love big family gatherings (not) at a snobby country-club for a huge wedding reception for an already pregnant (guess they just couldn’t do the birth control thing right) prima-dona cousin who already thinks she’s too good for everyone anyway? Aarrrrggggghhhh!!!!!!!

We already had to attend a homeowners association meeting at 10a.m. Sat. (fighting re-zoning issues), but Q insisted that we at least show up at his cousins reception at 5 that evening. (Please remember the state I am in after this weeks constant teasing and not being allowed to cum) After spending the afternoon with our son, we attended the reception while he went off to play D&D and then to work folding Sunday papers.

But bless Q. He actually set his computer to dial his pagers during the reception 5 times, so that we could gracefully leave early. He really is on-call this month, so he could say that truthfully. So we actually didn’t stay much more than an hour.

Funny thing was, we were actually close to the door when the Bride and Groom came in from their ‘private’ wedding ceremony (don’t ask me – I really don’t care anyway). And the Bride and Groom were already fighting. She was bitching and bitching at him about how he couldn’t do anything right, wasn’t doing things right, wasn’t paying enough attention to her, etc., etc.,…

Now, I really don’t like this girl anyway, but I had to snicker as I was thinking to myself that her new husband really need to give her a spanking. Then I got to thinking about what her mom had said to me when I asked what they needed. She said most anything for the kitchen. So here is my list of things to put in the gift box for her: A whole big set of wooden utensils and spatulas, a small acrylic cutting board, and a stainless steel flat spatula (more on this implement later). WEG!!!! Wonder if her husband will catch on…

This is Q’s family and his dad is the oldest of 8 (the youngest being only six months older than Q). Most of them are pretenders (pretending to have more than they do), a lot do drugs, all but a very few drink pretty heavily, and in spite of all this, a good portion are very ‘preachy Christians’ who have no idea what the heart of being spiritually good is.

Add to that the fact that the father of the bride has ‘hit’ on me on more than one occasion (including tonight when he kissed me on the ear ‘accidentally’ instead of the cheek – I know better). This SOB also used to beat (and I don’t mean consensual play of any kind) his wife (black eyes, bloodied lips, etc.). Plus the two of them were incredibly mean to Q’s grandmother and ‘used’ her whenever possible for both money and babysitting. Now they are both heavy cocaine users (dealing it may well be where they got the money for the reception).

We got our fair share of preaching to by his Uncle’s wife (who is a genetic Jew turned Pentecostal Holiness preacher), among others and an earful of the Bride’s ever-so-fake whining laughter but luckily the pagers went off before we had to sit through any of the Father and sister of the brides obnoxious country singing (they think they are great, but they really are awful – even Nashville ran them out).

And Q got a whole lot of eye-candy by watching his cousins friends in their slinky dresses. (Hey guys, I am NDN, almost 47, and have given birth to two kids – I don’t have much of a cutsy figure anymore unless you count the oversized breasts so I don’t mind him looking – I know who he comes home too WEG – besides, adds to the priming for me)

Have I said yet that I have a whole new love for pagers? I used to hate them, but now I have discovered that they actually are good for something (backstory – years ago right after I married my first husband, his buddies would page him at the most inopportune times just to tease us. Back then, pagers cost upwards of $150. I got so fed up one night I grabbed his pager and my 45 and took them to the backyard and needless to say, his boss wasn’t any too happy when he turned in what was left of his pager the next day)

Okay, back to before we left for the reception. Q had already played his Dom card, but decided to up the level of his Domliness. As I was putting my bra on, he walked over to me, tweezer nipple clips in hand, and put them on me. He arranged them carefully under my bra so they didn’t show through my clothes.

Starting at that point, and on the way too, and any opportunity he had during the reception, he would tug, pull, or just bump into my nipples, but just to the point of my cumming. He never actually let me cum until way later in the evening…

But, that is for the next post (yes, I am a terrible tease - spank me)

Catching Up

2005-04-18T00:05:00.000-05:00

I’ll start off by giving you the week leading up to our incredible weekend and a few details to fill in the last month (yeah, I know I can be a tease).

Over the last month with dealing with all of the issues, Q and I have had some very nice vanilla sex. However, I haven’t been giving him as many blow jobs as he has become accustomed to.

Q has only spanked me twice, and both of those times were ‘token’ light spankings (short, sweet, less than 50 and not at all intense – the kind that leaves me needing more). I really kind of expected (hoped) him to haul me to the bedroom at least once when my ‘taxes’ frustration was getting to me, but he decided to just let me work though it on my own. Not sure whether this was a good thing or a bad thing – just the way it was.

Well, I finally finished all of the taxes on Tuesday, finishing up the last remaining BIG pressing project that has been consuming my time. Now, hopefully, it is just back to the everyday chaos and challenges, one of which came along Wed. when we found that someone had stolen our son’s stereo and speakers out of his car. This poor kid has already been through it this year, and now this. Why does bad stuff always happen to such good people. Not meaning to brag, but this is a very good kid – always helpful, always trying to do the right thing, etc.

Tues. eve he started being the DOM again, by restricting my orgasms, and teasing me mercilessly, right to the point, and then not letting me cum.

Wed. eve came, and Q took a shower after dinner (I had promised him a BJ). So we retired to the bedroom early and I made good on my promise. Q actually started it by very subtly exercising his domliness. This got me in the headspace he wanted very quickly.

I thought, when we went to bed, that we were both just tired (we had gone to a pre-large Native American celebration banquet and ceremony and had a little wine) and that he was actually going to sleep. But when I reached down to rub him, I quickly realized that he wasn’t wearing any underwear. To me, this was his quiet dom way of telling me to give him a blow job. I rolled over and started working on him, sucking his cock and licking and sucking his balls (he loves this – and years ago I wouldn’t have gone there).

This might be squicky for some (because it would have for me even a few years ago – but my how things can change), but then he guided me to licking his ass (he keeps it very clean – otherwise this wouldn’t happen) challenging my role as a sub with something I don’t volunteer to do, and have really never liked doing. Nowadays, I will do most anything that he wants, especially when he puts on his ‘dom’ hat.

Picture the position: he is on his knees and I am licking his ass. Then he guides me to underneath him to start sucking his cock again, while my fingers are playing with his ass. With him over me in this position, I have totally lost any control – he is large and in charge.

He then asks me to get some oil (we have some fantastic carrot/avocado oil that is great for both lube and massage), and slide my finger into him while I am sucking him. I jumped up and complied, sliding quickly back underneath him and lightly tickling his prostate while sucking him. Let me say, he came very quickly, and as I have said before, Q doesn’t usually come quick (our ‘quickies’ are at least 15 minutes – and we count that as a successful quickie).

It was wonderful for both of us, and it was extremely difficult for me not to have an O during the session too. Q was so pleased, that afterwards he let me have two titty-gasms, before we went to sleep snuggled.

Then Thurs came and with it more relentless teasing and driving me crazy.

On Fri., our son’s plans were disrupted so he ended up staying home with us effectively disrupting ours as well. But he spent a lot of time in his car working on installing the ‘new’ stereo he found in a garage sale (a $400 for $75 that works really well).

So all Fri eve, whenever our son was outside, Q had me give him blow jobs. Over the course of the evening, he had three, each of which was for a duration of at least 30 minutes. I decided afterwards that women didn’t need collagen in their lips, they just needed to give more blow jobs WEG.

A little history here. 10 years ago, I would give Q a BJ occasionally, but I just never really got into it. But in the last five years, I have really got where giving him a BJ really turns me on too. And in the last couple of years, with Q’s coaching, I have gotten really good at them too (at least according to Q, and he’s the only that counts (or gets one from me) anyway).

Now the reason for the history: I was already primed and ready for sex/orgasms. But we were thwarted Fri. and I wasn't allowed to cum. So me giving him head, just made me even more jittery/crazy for what was to come Sat., when we were 99% sure we would have the house to ourselves.

I was even looking forward (more so than usual) to a catch-up punishment/maintenance spanking – just for the hot sex afterwards. Not a bit of spanking-schizo entered into my head for a change.

But Saturdays events are going to have to wait for another post (sorry readers) coz it's just too hot for this one.

I'll try this again...

2005-04-16T01:30:00.000-05:00

I have tried to post on three different occasions since my last post on here and had them be lost in the upload process. Unfortunately, I hadn't previously created them in word and then put them on here so they were lost. Just didn't have the time to do that.

Now I am back, and will try to start posting again on a regular basis. But I am thinking about defecting from blogspot. I know, I shouldn't complain about something that is 'free', but I can't tell you how many little irritating challenges I have had.

Hopefully, I'll have a nice, juicy, post for you after tomorrow (will probably post early next week).

Unfortunately (for us) our youngest stayed home tonight and worked on his car stereo (that he had to replace because the other one was stolen last week) instead of going out. I was (am) really horny. During the kids longer sessions outside I gave Q two blow-jobs, but that was all that came of the evening tonight. He will definitely be gone tomorrow night because he plays D&D and then folds papers.

Now I am up writing this because I am still so charged. I should be sleeping because Q and I have a meeting to go to tomorrow morning, but I thought I would give this another try.

Hopefully, in a few days, you loyal readers will have a new entry to read.

'Bright Eyes'

2005-03-15T23:55:00.000-06:00

I was totally and thoroughly spanked for the first time since my surgery (2/4), Sat. It lasted for about 45 minutes with two short breaks – one, to let me change my tampon, and the second so that Q could rest and go to the bathroom.

I couldn’t begin to tell you how many swats it was, but it was almost constant with no holds barred, excepting the two small breaks, starting with the whippy gear paddle til I was almost screaming constantly, and moving through the big bath brush, the big school paddle, the viper belt, the big leather paddle, the mini blind rod, the leather punishment strap, and the whippy gear again.

One thing I can say is that I feel much happier and contented now, even with my well bruised bottom.

It all started with Q’s dad waking me up by calling WAY too early on a Saturday morning. This made me a bit grumpy because I couldn’t get back to sleep, as I had also started my period. When I couldn’t get back to sleep, and was awake and alone, I started reflecting on all the shit that has been going on and really got myself in a pissy mood and a funk as well.

Q got up not too much later, and then our youngest got up to go to his bowling league. After the youngest left, I was just sitting in my recliner, not being bitchy or grumpy – just in a funk.

Q caught on to this pretty fast and asked what was wrong, so I started mildly spilling out my complaints of the day. He kept trying to get me to smile, but I just couldn’t give him anything but a fake one.

He then got out of his chair and came over to mine to give me a hug (or so I thought). It started out as a hug, and then he pulled me up to him. I just thought he wanted a ‘standing’ hug, which we had, but then he reached for my hand and started guiding me to the bedroom.

I kind of had a feeling what might be coming, but as we had been on such a ‘vanilla’ kick for so long, I wasn’t sure. And I really didn’t want a spanking right then, but in our relationship, that’s not my call, unless its for fun. I pulled my hand back once, but he quickly grabbed it again and continued gently guiding me to the bedroom.

Once there, he pulled out our ‘toybox’ and sat it on the bed, while I went to the bathroom. I was then directed to lean over the bed, and he pulled down my pants and started spanking. He didn’t start light either.

After about 10 solid minutes of hard spanking with the whippy gear flexible pong paddle, I was almost crying and I was screaming almost constantly. And, it having been so long since he had really spanked me hard, Q was having to do a whole lot of holding me down on the bed as well. Then I felt that sudden need to change my tampon (before things got messy). I called for a break and the phone rang at the same time.

Well, Q took care of the phone call, and I changed my tampon, taking extra time (dawdling), even in washing my hands. I usually don’t do this, and I paid for it this time.

As I came out of the bathroom, we were both giggling about the timing of the phone call and my calling for a break. Q commented, “Now there’s my bright eyes,” as he hugged me. “I don’t understand why this works, but I’m sure glad it does.”

I realized at that point that I was indeed already feeling much better – more calm and settled than I had been in a while. With his comment, I was hoping in a way that the spanking was over (but deep down knowing that I still probably needed more).

Well, my wonderful Q, who knows me so well, told me to present my butt again. I complied, and he started squirting liquid on my bottom. Only this wasn’t post spanking arnica, this was the glycerin & water, which told me I was in for a whole lot more spanking, and a hard one at that.

And the spanking began again - wet. First the big leather paddle, then the school paddle, then the viper belt, followed by more of the leather paddle and then the dreaded big bath brush. About 15-20 minutes later he stopped saying that he needed to exercise more because I was ‘wearing him out’ and that I could take more than he had endurance to give.

At this point I wasn’t sure whether the spanking was over so I commented that the right side of my bum felt like hamburger. Q said that it indeed was pretty close. While he was in the bathroom, I stood up and he promptly said, “I didn’t tell you to get up yet.” So I bent back down over the bed and just relaxed.

Q is stealth. He came out of the bathroom so quietly and picked up the whippy gear paddle and started spanking again before I even knew he was back in the room. He then left some healthy stripes across my bottom and my upper thighs with the mini-blind rod, commenting about how funny it is the things we find by accident.

Then he pulled out the leather punishment strap and finally finished up with the big leather paddle (and man can he ever swing that one with meaning). After the last segment (which lasted a little over 5 minutes), I was pretty well spent.

Funny thing is, I was also very content and happy. After Q applied post spanking arnica and creams, and pulled my jeans back up, I hugged him for a long time, thanking him for reading me so well and being such a great hubby.

We didn’t have time for sex, as our son was due back shortly. We saved the hot sex for later that night, after we had the house to ourselves again. And it was a nice, HOT session indeed.

Hopefully, things are returning to normal around here. And I hope to get at least half-way caught up with reading on my favorite blogs again in the near future.

Where Have I been, you ask???

2005-03-14T00:59:00.000-06:00

(Intended to post this Friday)

Since Feb 4:

Have had a minor surgery, which I posted about while trying to continue to blog amidst my lifes chaos, before I decided just to lay low, and forget trying to keep up with fun on the computer.

Q was gone for a week to a class for work, and came back with his wrists shot from the computers/desks he had to use during the class. He still hasn’t totally recovered.

Have buried two Aunts (not unexpected due to health), and one cousin (not totally unexpected because he was over 100)

Have had 10 relatives from the west coast in and out of the house over a weeks period

Had my oldest decide to move out on his own, so to speak

Had my dad almost pass out at the funerals of his sisters from stress related blood sugar issues

My youngest (16) had a car wreck – not his fault, and he was not seriously hurt, just typical minor whiplash and concussion from brain jostle, but the girl that caused the accident had a suspended license, expired tag, and no insurance

Been to court, twice

Spent 12 days fighting my ISP because they screwed up on a major upgrade (and wouldn’t admit it) and all my domain forwarded email disappeared (their fault – proved it because if I forwarded it to my yahoo mail everything came through just fine, but when I forwarded to my ISP mail was lost) plus half of my regular email was also bouncing for no apparent reason. Won’t go into all the boring techie details, but it was a huge fight which I ended up spending over 60 man hours on both phone and machines to get it fixed.

I was the ‘peanut butter’ in a sandwich rear-end wreck – no injuries, not my fault as I was stopped

Am trying to get a settlement from the insurance on getting my roof replaced, and working with roofers to do so

So I have been working with insurance companies on medical coverage, claims, getting the car appraised/fixed, and the DMV and the girl to work on her paying for the damages on my son’s wreck and talking to the lawyer on options, should she decide NOT to pay.

And running my son to treatments for his whiplash/concussion

And jostling insurance companies on the sandwich wreck.

And more running to treatments for whiplash but now for both me and my son as he was also with me in the sandwich wreck (and has commented that he is not sure he really wants to drive anymore)

And, we are trying to look for land so we can move out of this effing city.

So you can see why I have avoided the computer, except to check emails occasionally – I haven’t had the time and I am exhausted.

Still juggling a lot of this, so I may still be sporadic – sorry.

Actually, not much going on in our sex lives either. A few vanilla (but very nice) sex sessions, and a few more oral sessions. Only three tiny (by comparison) spanking sessions. The surgery was the first thing that put that on hold, but since I have healed well, we have had one light playful session, and two totally playful sessions that were not too intense, and a whole lot of playful swats when Q could sneak them in.

And I have learned that a totally sexy and for-fun spanking with the lexan paddle, can be really nice and enjoyable.

If life would settle down a little, we are definitely ready to play again. I can only hope for time this weekend. (We actually had a GOOD time this weekend. Will post in a day or so)

How has everyone else been? Is life as crazy for you guys as it has been here? Or am I just in some kind of chaos vortex?

Kinky Desperate Housewives

2005-02-13T21:24:00.000-06:00

On tonights show "Desperate Housewives", there were two amazingly kinky references.

One was a mom playing 'psychological warfare' with her kids threatening to spank them for stealing. She layed out five implements: switch, ping-pong paddle, large spatula with holes, very large (wide) wooden hairbrush, and a braided leather belt for the kids to make their choice. She swung several implements, striking them on the table and describing their particular attributes with remarkable detail.

Of course, she didn't spank her kids (politically correct and all), but she did give a knowing grin afterwards. Hmmm....

And then there was Brie, the anal-retentive prim and proper housewife who had decided to stay with her husband despite his infidelity. Brie forced her husband to admit what he was looking for sexually outside their marraige - domination. Of course, she was properly shocked, but they watched a video together.

Finally towards the end of the show, Brie decided to try to learn. Her husband pulled a box out of their closet, and promised her that this would bring new intimacy and passion in their relationship. When he pulled out the handcuffs, she asked if she could run them through the dishwasher first and he agreed. End of scene.

Of course, this is primetime network TV - they aren't going to show anything - but there are definitely some kinky references/writers here. Q and I watch the show because it is hilariously funny and twisted (and NOT a reality show). But these twists make it even more interesting...

No sex or kink going on in our lives until next week, but I can tell you the tension is definitely building. Of course, I have taken care of Q a couple of times with a nice long blow job - but I am on hold.

Check back after next weekend. Hopefully things will be wild and wonderful.

Sorry readers - taking a break

2005-02-06T23:55:00.000-06:00

I intended to post this notice BEFORE I had (minor) surgery (last Fri – all is well, just recuperating) to let you know that things might be a bit dry on the blog for about 2 weeks. But life interfered again and I had a whole lot of family issues to deal with.

During this possible 2 week period, I will at least try to update you once a week. I might even come up with some thoughts that I have written in the past, but don’t count on it, coz I doubt I will be able to sit comfortably for very long at a time (and unfortunately it won’t be due to a spanked bottom).

Don't worry. I plan on being back as soon as possible. So check in at least once a week, to see if we are back yet.

Just Because

2005-02-02T01:07:00.000-06:00

Only dropped the tiniest of hints that I might want a spanking this weekend, and only once. Of course, by the time the timing was right, was really pulling on the spanking-schizo.

Saturday evening came. The kids were out playing DD, and we were watching soft porn on cable. It wasn’t long until I was giving Q a blow job, and he was rewarding me with his cum.

Then we retired to the bedroom. After brushing my teeth and cleaning up to crawl into bed and under the warm covers, Q came out of the bathroom and insisted that I drop my legs over the edge of the bed for a spanking.

He pulled out the toybox, and the first implement he pulled out was the new WG paddle. Have I told you how stingy that thing is? YEOUCH! He whacked away on my bum for about 30 with it before moving to the leather paddle for about six. Somewhere in the middle of all of this, he pulled out the glycerin to soften and wet me up. For some reason, I was really having a hard time staying in position. I kept standing up because the paddle was so stingy.

After rubbing my bottom, it was then on to the 5 gallon paint stirrer across my sit-spot for about 20. For a light implement, that thing can really sting across an already tender spot. Q picked the leather punishment strap for the next 10 or so.

Some more rubbing and then he pulled out the school paddle. What was this about? This wasn’t a bad punishment – but then I remembered, I had been moving out of position a whole lot, so I just gripped the pillow harder. Q only gave me 4 with it, luckily, and they weren’t really too hard, thank goodness.

Then more glycerin spray and rubbing and (gulp) now to the big bathbrush for about a dozen. Next, Q decides to be funny and grabs a sweetgrass braid that we have lying on the dresser (we burn them for incense and NDN rituals). It is about 18” long and about 3/8” in diameter tapering down at the end which is tied in a knot.

For such a harmless light thing, it stings. Probably because of the knot in the end. But leave it to Q to find some other household object that is usable as a spanking implement.

After about a dozen with it, Q give me another 2 dozen with the backscratcher, and then finishes me off with another 20 or so with the WG paddle. He then rubbed me well with arnica and aloe lotion.

After he told me that I could get up, I hugged him, and thanked him for spanking me, and we cuddled for awhile (use your imagination here). Then it was time for a snack – we had built up an appetite - for food this time WEG.

Sleeping is so nice after a good spanking. It just seems like I sleep better. Maybe it is because I feel so loved and protected.

Afterthought: You know a spanking was really good, when you re-live it in your mind later so that you can type it out, and you get hot and bothered all over again. Darn job anyway - can't go wake Q up and jump him right now (pout).

Paddle Review (as promised)

2005-01-31T01:03:00.000-06:00

This is a review for the Whippy Gear paddle I accidentally won through ebay. I have linked to one like it fyi, but unfortunately it looks like all they have is their ebay store, and nothing is up for auction at this time. It is their flexible pong paddle.

From the bottoms view: It is a paddle that can be used both for a sexy spanking and for a harder/discipline spanking. It has a lot of sting, but also has some thud. When used hard, it can make an impact. Definitely not something that is all sensual (as I thought it might be). All in all – a thumbs up.

From the tops POV: Really good tapered handle. Grips nicely and swings easily. Can be used moderately with some sting, and harder with both thud and sting. Really warms up the subs bottom quickly, leaving a nice red glow with little effort. Very effective when you want to make sure that you have covered all spankable areas of the bottom with a red glow. Leaves some ‘edging’ marks when swung hard, and does leave light bruising with hard swings over a moderate period of time. Is noisy, but when used moderate to hard, the sub is noisier (WEG). Is even more effective when used in both a first and second spanking of the day.

Is definitely VERY stingy when used in the second spanking. But then, I don’t have much experience with ‘seconds’, so any paddle might be equally as stingy.

In our opinions, it is worth $20-25, but I wouldn't pay much more (but then of course, I am a tightwad). Their standard asking price is $39.95, but you might find one on ebay auction, like we did, for less.

This is quickly becoming one of Q's favorites. Tomorrow, I will blog about our weekend fun.

Fun with Lexan?

2005-01-28T18:02:00.000-06:00

Well, I was not in a very good mood all day. Dealing with a 19 yr old that can’t focus on what to do with his life is very trying.

But Q came home in a pretty good mood, and to an old-fashioned home cooked meal.

After dinner, Q sent our youngest out for desert (our oldest was already gone). While he was gone, I gave Q a nice blow job.

<>Q reciprocated later in the bathroom by giving me a titty-gasm.

Later, while lying in bed together watching a movie, my butt cheek was itching (the healing from an abrasion from last weekend). After I had scratched a bit, Q layed his hand on it, and I suggested that he slap it a few times – that would make it stop itching.

It happened to be during a commercial, so I hinted at a spanko-mercial (spanking during the commercial break). Q surprised me. He had already quietly gotten the lexan paddle and quickly began smacking me with it (about 40 times).

It was still pretty stingy but enjoyable. He was going for a lighter touch with it. Amazing. Yes a nasty awful lexan paddle can be used for a fun spanking. Hmmmm, new knowledge here WEG.

Afterwards, Q snuggled up to my now warm buns and began playing with my tits. Wasn’t long until I had a couple of orgasms, after which I reached my hand back to play with his now hard cock. What can I say except that hot sex followed, with me starting on top and him finishing on top.

Looks like we're both on 'top' of the world tonight (haha). And it's only Thursday....

Catching Up - Sunday

2005-01-28T01:16:00.000-06:00

Wow, I can’t believe how raw my bum feels after two spankings in one day. It is definitely ouchy – but in a nice way.

All that happened on Sunday, was that Q and I took advantage of the kids being out of the room for a minute, and he gave me about 20 hard smacks with his hand, over the jeans in the kitchen for ‘good measure.’ Even that was more ouchy than usual because of my already well-used bottom.

It’s just so nice to have my spanko man feeling more normal again.

WEDNESDAY

Q came home in a mood – not a bad mood, but a mood nonetheless. If the kids hadn’t been home I am quite sure that he would have taken his mild frustration with city politics out on my bottom, and I would have joyfully let him.

Not only that, but he was slightly horny all evening. Not quite enough to say ‘to heck with it all’, but enough to play and tease and slip his cock into my willing mouth anytime the kids weren’t in the room.

He gave me several titty-gasms whenever the opportunity allowed. By the time the evening was done, though, it was too late for any fooling around. He still had to get up to go to work. But it was still a fun evening.

We don’t get to have ‘quickies’ around here. Q just isn’t wired for quickies. In our 20+ years, we have maybe managed 3 or 4. An average ‘quickie’ for us is at least 15 minutes (sorry gals if this makes you jealous, but being able to grab a quickie on occasion would be nice too, especially for Q).

I'll try to get the paddle review up for you tomorrow.

Catching up - Saturday

2005-01-26T02:56:00.000-06:00

Saturday evening, after the kids had gone out, Q asked if I wanted my spanking now, or after my shower. Having a case of slight spanking-schizo, I did a couple of things, putting it off. Then Q demanded that I go in the bedroom, and ‘present butt’.

Since I have been remarkably well behaved for the past couple of weeks, this was more of a GG/fixer spanking. One meant more for enjoyment/need and not punishment. Although with Q, 90% of spankings leave a definite lasting impression.

After stripping, I started to bend over the bed, when Q decided to move me on the bed to where we could watch in the dresser mirror – or at least he could. At this point, I decided to get the ebay Whippy-gear paddle out and give it to him.

Funny thing is, he already knew I had won it (we share our ebay account) from when he had bid on something else and was curious as to what it was and when I would give it to him.

When I got the paddle in, I had thought it would be a good warm-up paddle, and not too stingy. But I also knew Q, and that he could wield anything with significant meaning, and was I ever right. I’ll write up a ‘paddle review’ later.

So, with this new implement in hand, Q started spanking me with it. Man does it sting in his hands. After about 40 relatively hard spanks, he noticed my bum was getting a little rubbery so he pulled out the glycerin/water and sprayed me down with it.

He then moved to the viper belt for about 20 more. Q didn’t like the angle he was having to use the viper belt (it wraps), so he pulled out the big leather belt for about a dozen.

Then he pulled out his favorite – the big bath brush. After about 20 with it (although not as hard as it would be if this was a punishment spanking), he broke yet another one (darn glued together wood).

So he moved on to the 5/8” cane for a few measured swings, and then a rapid fire pattern that always gets me tearing at the bedsheets. Then it was on to about a dozen with the big leather paddle.

He finished me off with about 20 more with the new WG paddle, leaving me a sore, but very contented, loved, and happy subbie, with a well mottled bottom. Q, of course, lotioned my bottom quite well before all was through.

I, upon on his request, already had a spare bathbrush. I had actually found one that is one complete piece of wood – no glued parts. I’ll have to look for another like it to have for another spare. Hopefully this one won’t break, but we’ll have to wait for another day to try it out. If he breaks this one, I may be in for a session of woodworking, copying the paddle (weight, balance, and grip) with a better grade of wood.

<>Poor Q, still being somewhat stressed, and with a low libido, sex did not follow, but a lot of cuddling did. I took a shower afterwards and the hot water spraying from the shower head definitely reminded me that I had been well spanked.

A few hours later, we crawled into bed to talk/cuddle/watch TV. Before we got into bed for the night, while we were brushing our teeth, etc., Q walked behind me and swatted my behind hard, but playfully, with the new bathbrush, before dropping it into our toybox.

I screeched “Yeow,” grabbing my butt. “I now know why other subs cringe when there SO’s decided to spread out spankings to two or three sessions in one day. That really stings.”

<>Yep, I did it. My mouth opened and out came the words giving Q new ideas. What is it with my mouth and not thinking sometimes, or is it just something subconscious.

“Oh. So you are saying I need to do more than one session?” Q replied. I just shrugged and continued brushing my teeth.

Beating him to bed, I crawled under the covers. When Q crawled into bed, he still had this new idea I had given him, rolling around in his head. He pulled the covers back, and since I was oh so conveniently lying on my stomach, he starting smacking my bottom with his hand.

<>After about 20 or so with his hand (which really stung on an already tenderized bum), he reached over to the drawer. I didn’t realize that he had been keeping the dreaded lexan in the bedside drawer for easy reach.

Apparently, he had put it back in the toybox, so he closed the drawer. After a few moments, he jumped out of bed and pulled the toybox out. He had apparently decided that he indeed did want to give me another spanking.

He dug around and found the nasty lexan, and brought the new WG paddle as well. I didn’t realize just how much more a second spanking can hurt when given just a few hours after a rather intense first one. YEOUCH!

Q spanked me for a solid five minutes (i.e. eternity WEG), with both the lexan and the WG. Thankfully, he was spanking lightly – although it sure didn’t feel like it at the time. I am surprised that I didn’t chew the pillow up. It stung enough that Q had to put me back into position several times. I just couldn’t help trying to roll out of his reach.

Afterwards, as I cuddled up to him in the ‘spoons’ position, he reached around and grabbed my nipples, giving me several titty-gasms. As he pulled me tighter, I noticed that he had a nice erection. (Yeah, hot sex after a spanking - gotta love it)

Rolling over, so that I could play with him, Q decided he wanted a snack – me. After several more orgasms, I then positioned myself so that I could suck on him as well.

After about 45 minutes of giving him head, Q fed me his tasty cum. I thought about snowballing him, but then decided I wanted it for myself. I continued to milk him until he could no longer take it.

Afterwards, we slept blissfully, even though the bed was a total wreck.

Mmmmmm, have I mentioned lately how much I love my spanking man?

Catching up

2005-01-25T18:21:00.000-06:00

Sorry, readers, I have been a bit of a twit lately. I think Q’s mood, really spilled over on me. However, if you want to keep up with the events in our Ds/DD lives, I do have about 4 installments covering this last weekend. I will post them one a day and that should take us up to this weekend, which hopefully, will be equally as fun.

Friday night Q came home in a really good mood. The kids left to do their things, and we got some alone time. Funny, neither one of us were in a real amorous mood though.

So we retired to the bedroom and a movie about 9pm. He still had to get up and go to work on Saturday. We laid around and cuddled and talked. At one point Q whacked my bottom with his hand and I replied with an “Mmmm, you can keep that up for awhile.” He took the not so subtle hint and whacked a few more times with his hand (until his wrist started tingling), and then grabbed the trusty backscratcher.

When he started with the backscratcher, I commented that I had hoped for something a bit lighter (that thing hurts). He responded by spanking me with a pillow, to which we both started laughing hilariously. Q then continued with the backscratcher for a short session, and then we went back to cuddling.

I told him that was nice, for a teaser session. We then set a date for a longer session the next night.

Things seem to be looking up...

Not much happening here...

2005-01-20T01:13:00.000-06:00

Sorry dear readers. There hasn't been much happening around here due to Q's lousy job. Ranting follows.

Oh, he got his New Years deadline met, only to have another deadline for Jan 31 thrown on him for reports on 190+ Linux systems that the project of 12/31 implemented. And still, with the inadequate amount of people to actually get the job done :-(

Not only that, but the bigwigs in the headquarter office which is 600+ miles away, are breathing down his bosses neck for reports NOW. These dweebs have no clue what actually goes on in the trenches. ARGhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

God I hate large multi-national corporations!!!!!! But I guess I should be grateful that he has a decent job in this area of the country. But the pressure that is put on him still pisses me off.

Right now he is working from 7:30am to at least 7:30pm M-F and usually Saturday as well. Anytime for family left? Not hardly. Plus his dad has been hounding him to come 'do some stuff' on his computer for him.

When he actually does go over to his dad's, it will be at least 4 hours if not more. His dad will inevitably think of at least a dozen other things he 'wants' Q to do, and will continually whine about them until Q gives in. And he sure as hell doesn't care if Q hasn't had time to spend with us. He thinks he is the most important and should come first. And he certainly doesn't think (or even care) what Q might want or need to do.

The guy has been retired (and is in great health) for 2 years and drives us nuts. I don't mean to speak ill of the older generation, but this man is impossible, demanding, whiney, bitchy, very self-centered, and I could go on ad infinitum, and he was this way before he retired. It has just magnified 10 fold since.

OK, I'll shut up now, before I get myself in trouble if Q reads this. It's not that he doesn't agree (he does), he just can't handle me 'bitching' about it.

Sorry guys. Hopefully something will happen worth writing about this weekend. And, hopefully, this will be the last of the 'high pressure' work for Q for awhile, after 1/31.

2005-01-12T15:12:00.000-06:00

Said I would post about last Sundays spanking so here it is. OK, so this is a bit longer than I planned, but while activity is low around here, at least you have something to read WEG.

As ya’ll know, Q’s job stress has been keeping us from being more active. This past week he has been coming home each day a little better – not perfect, but better. Friday, I was in the mood for a spanking, but by Fri. night, I was pretty ambiguous (spanko schizo strikes again). Friday night came, and we were both pretty tired from the week, so we just relaxed and went to sleep early, after I had given him an hour long blow job (with him not cumming – which is a usual result of this type of stress for him).

Saturday morning came and he woke up before me. When I awoke, he was in his office working on my dad’s computer. I had thought he needed to go into work, but he decided ‘to heck with it’ and stayed home instead. He was in a pretty good mood. Later that afternoon, I gave him another BJ under his desk, while he surfed his porn pics. Still no results from him after an hour.

Otherwise, the day went by uneventfully and that evening we played video games with our youngest. I really wasn’t in the mood for a spanking, so when we went to bed that night, we just cuddled and talked and laughed. I expressed to him that I understood what he was going through, but I wasn’t going to just sit back and go with the flow completely, as I have in the past. I was at least going to put forth some effort at getting him through his stress mood.

No, I wasn’t going to put pressure on him for sex. I could go with the flow there. I just wasn’t going to back off and let him work through it by himself, as I have in the past. I also told him that if anything I was doing was making things worse, to let me know and I would stop. My basic strategy is just to be there – completely – for him whenever he needed me and to support his needs. Not to push, not to demand, just to work with him.

I also told him that I still needed an occasional spanking (even if I hadn’t earned a discipline spanking, then a maintenance or GG). That, plus the orgasms he gives me by pinching my nipples in that special way he does (titty-gasms) would get me through. That was all I really needed, outside of his communicating with me. This really seemed to please him and relax him as well. So I guess what I said put him at ease. We went to sleep spooned together, after a lot of fun talking.

It always bothers him and makes him feel bad when his libido drops like this – he feels like he is letting me down. He’s really not, especially if he tells me what is going on. He always takes care of my needs, even if he can’t cum himself. I worry more about him not being able to cum – I don’t think that is necessarily good for him either, emotionally or physically.

Ok, so it’s pretty vanilla so far, but the good stuff is yet to come for those of you who have stayed with me.

Sunday comes, and he works on the computers and we get a few things done around the house. I was back in the ambiguous mood about spanking (schizo again).

That afternoon, I again went back to Q’s office and start giving him a BJ. This time we had success, and I got a quart (just kidding – but it was a lot) of his cum for a reward. I grinned like a minx at him afterwards, asking him to see if he didn’t feel better this week after actually letting loose.

Afterwards, we went to the bedroom – mainly to use the bathroom. However, I got pushed back on the bed for some titty-gasm play. Well, this got interrupted by me safe-wording on him for an urgent need to go to the bathroom myself (I mean, you really don’t want to accidentally poop all over your partner – unless you are into that, and we are definitely NOT)

Q had a good laugh at my first use of the emergency safe-word and halfway dared me to blog about it. So here it is. p~~~~~~~~ I have no idea if he actually reads my blog, but I don’t hide it. He can find it if he likes.

Later, we cooked steaks on the grill, and even our oldest graced our presence by joining us for dinner. After dinner, the two kids took off to play Dungeons and Dragons with some friends.

We are now alone, and sitting in our recliners. Bored with the usual lack of stuff on the tube, Q gets up, comes over to me, grabs me by the back of my hair and pulls me up, grinning wickedly. This is the first time he has elicited ‘ouches’ from me by pulling on my hair (I have a tough scalp).

“I’ll have to try that method more often,” he says grinning as he now guides me to the bedroom.

Once in the bedroom he pushes me down in spanking position on the bed. I am still fully clothed, so I was wondering what he was up to. I didn’t have to wait long, though, because he pulled out the ‘toybox’ and placed it on the table beside the bed.

Now I was giggly. He pulled out the CB paddle, pulled down my jeans to my knees (I go commando under jeans – so no panties), and commenced to give me some hard smacks with his hand and then about a dozen with the CB. Just my two-cents here, but I could of used a lot more with the lighter implements WEG.

He drops CB back into the box and I turn my head to look at what he is getting next, and he pulls ‘full dom’ mode on me.

“You’re not supposed to look,” he says as he grabs a dark t-shirt off the dresser. He then puts the t-shirt over my head and says that this is my blindfold.

Whoa, new experience here. It was exciting for me to have him take more control, but it was a little startling at first. At least it was just a dark t-shirt laid loosely, but I did have to push it up over my nose so that I could breathe better as the spanking progressed. Hmmm, think we need to shop for a blindfold to drop in the toybox.

Well, the next implement he pulled out was the big (dreaded) bathbrush. He likes this one so well because it elicits screams from me with very little effort from him. And this was the first time he had one to use since he broke the last one, so I knew that it was coming eventually.

He gave me at least 20 with BBB, moderately hard, so I knew this wasn’t going to be a GG spanking. I did only have one minor indiscretion in the past two weeks, so this was more of a preventative maintenance spanking, and therefore harder than a GG, but less than a punishment.

Since I hadn’t been truly spanked in over two weeks (thank goodness for the ever so short warm-up), my bum was fresh and tender so it didn’t take long until I was trying to pull up onto the bed out of his way (haha, like he would let that happen – pure reflexes) because that thing is really ouchy. Not only that, but I was lifting my legs (as we tend to do in response to pain on the bum). He wasn’t having any of that either, and was pushing my legs back down while swatting my thighs for effect.

As he was changing implements, I asked him to bring me the BBB. I wanted to show him something. I showed him where this bathbrush is not a solid piece of wood, but actually two rounded sides glued onto the long center handle and that was therefore the reason the other one probably broke. Since they are only $3 at Wally world, he told me we needed at least one spare. So it’s more implement shopping this week. Then I slipped my ‘blindfold’ back on like a good subbie.

After dropping BBB back into the toybox, he pulled out the Vermin (bathbrush) and gave me about 10 with it. I’m really not sure which bb is worse, but right now I am going with BBB. (Or should I call it BBBB for Big Bad Bath Brush ;)

Then he pulled out (I am pretty sure) the flexi-ruler. For something so innocent looking, Q can make that thing really sting. He went after me with it for about 20 or 30 rapid fire smacks, making me yelp each time. I really hope they don’t come out with an 18” version of this like he wants.

He then pulled out our homemade leather paddle (I know this one), for about ten really hard smacks. The way Q wields this one smacks pretty hard as well. He especially loves using this one across the sit spot.

Then back to BBB, to cover any areas otherwise missed (about 6 smacks). He has gotten where he doesn’t like to leave any spankable area untouched, so if I am not sporting color on a particular spot, he goes back and makes sure it is well covered.

This may seem a bit much for some, but as Q has learned what my limits are for each implement as well as a spanking in general, so he now uses them with a lot more force than he did in the beginning. And actually, the session wasn’t much over 10 minutes long. But he had definitely exhausted me WEG. The peace that comes with a good spanking, spread warmly through me, leaving me smiling the rest of the evening.

Of course, being the great Dom that he is, Q applied arnica spray and cream over my entire bum while admiring his artwork. Nope, no hot sex following (his stress mood), but it was great, nonetheless.

I stayed in place (I know better than to move) until he pulled my pants up and pulled me up for a hug. And we did a lot of hugging and kissing afterwards as I thanked him for taking care of me so well.

Afterwards, with glowingly warm buns, I felt loved and contented, even though it could have continued with some lighter spanks, especially to an orgasm or two (I know, I know, I’m a pain slut). I am just glad that Q understands his spanko wife’s needs well enough to take care of them. It’s so nice to be well loved (and well spanked too WEG).

The Ebay paddle is here!

2005-01-10T16:14:00.000-06:00

Just arrived yesterday. According to email from seller was shipped from Canada on the 29th - so ten days mail time.

It looks to be well made and is moderately thick, though flexible and lightweight. Slapped it on myself a few times (which isn't really a good test but better than nothing). Looks to be a great warm-up paddle and fun paddle, and water-proof. Seems to sting well, with no bruising from weight (or very little). So it looks like a good $15 spent, but I am cheap and wouldn't pay the retail price of $39.95 for it. My thoughts, 15-20 would be my max. But that is just my opinion.

I probably won't give it to Q until March (Yes guys, I will report on how it feels/works when it is actually in HIS hand).

Told you I would report. Also checked on ebay. They seem to have a few more paddles for auction here, for another day or so. A couple are still at the starting bid of $2. So if you guys don't fight over them, somebody might get a really good deal. Still not exactly endorsing them - just a product report. Have no idea, as they are new ebayers, what their long-term record will be like. For your reference, the one I got was a flex pong paddle.

Looks to me like they are testing their ebay market - to see what they can sell stuff for on ebay. Might be worth watching.

Have some hot spanking to report on but will probably do it tomorrow, so check back WEG.

Point of View - Paddle

2005-01-05T21:47:00.000-06:00

I don't have much to write here as unfortunately, not much is going on. Q is in a bit of a funk. We had some light spanking yesterday. Q trapped me over the bathroom sink and gave me some playful swats with his hand.

I, of course, encourage him (WEG) with a light moan and a smile. He reciprocated with a few more hand swats, and then grabbed his wooden hairbrush for about 20 moderate strokes (yikes, he's discovered the hairbrush - tee hee). Then he grabbed the long plastic comb, and started spring-flipping it on my bum. Yeeouch! For something so small, that thing packs a sting.

Unfortunately, that is all there was. Nothing followed. I had hope that would act as a small 'fixer' for me, but darn it, if it didn't just leave me wanting more :(

Q seems to be doing a bit better each day, so hopefully this weekend we'll have some kink time.

For your pleasure in the meantime: I was reading one of Joannie's stories from Bethany's, which inspired me to write this little piece. Thanks Joannie, for letting me borrow your creative use of POV.

THE PADDLES POV

She drove to the woodworking store with the very intent of buying a good piece of hardwood to construct me. She chose oak, for it was a durable wood, and she remembered her and her brothers spankings from childhood, and how the pine paddles had broken and splintered when used with any force. At that time she had no idea that her own bottom would be the one that I was to be used on first.

I sat in the garage for merely a week until her oldest (adopted runaway daughter of 13), yanked her chains enough to anger her. Chloe and Joe had tried everything with the girl from grounding from all privileges (phone, time with friends, TV time, etc), to nailing her window shut, and removing her bedroom door and were getting nowhere with this latest episode. That was obvious from the phone calls from school about her stealing shoes and jewelry from kids and her lying and not showing up at all. Basically the girl was beginning to endanger her own life, as well as those around her, or Chloe would have never even considered this type of punishment. I think the joyride in the police car was probably the last straw for poor Chloe.

As Chloe and Joe both suffered from carpal tunnel, Chloe was looking for an implement that didn’t have to be swung hard, just tapped, and that hopefully just the fear of looking at it would affect a change in behavior.

Blood boiling and tears streaming down her face, Chloe sat out to work on devising such an implement. She carefully cut the handle portion and then set to work the router on smoothing all the edges. This process took several days, between tending to her two younger boys, and the daughters needs. No one knew what she was actually doing with her stolen moments in the garage.

Chloe’s careful construction of me was mainly an outlet for the frustration and anger she was feeling in dealing with this ‘out of control’ wild child. She had no clue what was to come a decade later.

After she had all eighteen inches of my 3 1/2” wide 5/8” thick oak formed into a usable paddle, she then worked at sanding me to smoothness. She then decided to bore varying sized holes along the business length of me, some going all of the way through, and others just partially through. Her intent was to cause a sting, without having to use a heavy impact.

After smoothing all the holes so that there were no rough edges, she then carefully oiled me with lemon oils. She swung it through the air several times and realized that the handle needed some kind of padding for a better grip. Looking around, Chloe decided that duct tape would do nicely. After sufficiently padding my handle, I was now ready for use.

Over the years I was pulled out often, for intimidation purposes, but never once used on a child. As the kids grew older, the need for intimidation diminished and I was put on a shelf in the closet, thinking I would never see the light of day again.

After being put away for so many years, I was surprised to be pulled out one day. But I was even more surprised when it was Chloe who was on the receiving end of my first sting.

Joe didn’t swing me very hard, but I nonetheless caused a lot of yelping from Chloe. After seven blows, he stopped, examining her now reddening bottom, which now sported splotching from the holes she had so carefully drilled in me, and was beginning to bruise slightly. He carefully felt of her bottom, and decided that he didn’t like the rubbery hardening that I caused. So he moved to his belt for the rest of that session.

Disappointed that Joe now seemed to fear using me, I thought that was probably to be my only use. Surprisingly, though, he didn’t put me back in the closet. He slid me carefully under the bed.

Being under the bed afforded me the new opportunity to overhear their conversations. Joe and Chloe had discovered erotic spanking. They didn’t do it often, but it was quite obvious that they both enjoyed it. Joe just didn’t like leaving bruises or heavy marks on Chloe, so unfortunately I didn’t get to participate in the fun. I just had to get my pleasure vicariously from the sounds on the bed above.

They soon added a heavy yardstick to their ‘toys’ under the bed. Then they purchased a small leather paddle from the local sex shop. It didn’t have a very good handle, and they were disappointed in it. So Chloe decided that she would make some ‘toys’ from leather.

They shopped at the local leather shop and picked up a nice, large, scrap piece of belt leather. Chloe then fashioned an 18” long, 10” wide rounded leather paddle of two pieces of the leather glued together with a thin metal ruler down the center and into the handle for reinforcement. Again, she used the duct tape for making the handle more comfortable and sturdy. The two of them really liked this one. While this paddle is a bit cruder than myself, I must say Chloe is very creative and innovative when it comes to making ‘toys’. This one was stored with me, under the bed. And yes, I was a bit jealous.

It wasn’t long until they added a dowel rod and a light riding crop to the growing stash beside me. Then Chloe crafted yet another implement. As she hated the viper type end of the old belt that Joe used, she decided to make a replacement for it that hopefully wouldn’t wrap so nastily.

She crafted a 1 ½” wide, 30” long leather strap out of the same material she had made the leather paddle from, reinforcing it in the same manner. And this joined the rest of us under the bed. Again, spanking play was not too common, but I was definitely jealous that I wasn’t used. At least now I could listen to what was going on.

Soon, all of us ‘toys’ (yes, me included) were dropped into a plastic box that could be slid under the bed, and a leather flogger was added to the collection.

Then things changed for the better.

Apparently Joe and Chloe had decided to enter into a DD/Ds relationship, and that punishments, as well as fun spankings were to be used on a fairly regular basis. This gave me renewed hope. I really liked the feel of being used on Chloe’s pretty bottom that one time.

During what I think was Chloe’s second punishment spanking, Joe reached into the box and pulled me out, once again. Surprisingly, this time he swung me harder for ten strokes. As he still didn’t like the rubbery way I left Chloe’s bottom feeling, he then moved on to other implements.

But, happily, this wasn’t the end for me. Joe continued to use me to make his point during a punishment for Chloe. Amazingly, from what I could hear, he would really let her have it with other implements and while she would cry out and yelp, he could never get her to cry. Over time, the strokes he gave her with me increased in severity, even bringing blisters and sometimes pinpoints of blood from the holes in me, when I was used on the bare. Obviously, marking and bruising her sweet bottom was no longer a problem for Joe.

Then Chloe made an interesting discovery from internet reading. If you mix glycerin with warm water, and spray it on the bottom, you no longer get the rubbery hardening from heavier implements. So they tried it. Unfortunately for Chloe it was during a punishment spanking.

Joe sprayed down her bottom, rubbing the glycerin mixture in and then began with me. After five hard strokes, he carefully checked her bottom and was very pleased with the results from the glycerin. He then gave her four more strokes, swinging me very hard. I was surprised that Chloe wasn’t yet crying, but she seems to be really tough.

After checking her bottom once again, and reminding Chloe of her misdeeds, he then decided to swing me with a two-handed swing for four more strokes, before moving on to other implements.

Hearing Joe’s comments afterwards about how pleased he was with the glycerin mixture and that he can now feel free to use me, gives me glorious hope that I will get used more often in the future to kiss Chloe’s sweet bottom.

Little did Chloe know what she was creating over a decade ago. Just one of life’s surprising little twists.

Be careful what you create in a moment of anger. It may come back to 'bite you in the butt' later - WEG.

Eeeew - Vanilla weekend warning

2005-01-03T15:07:00.000-06:00

Well, for all the build-up and anticipation, the weekend turned into a real dud. (Sorry folks, no kink in this post)

HAPPY 2005 EVERYONE!!!!

Between an unexpected visit from family (Q’s mom and stepdad – they NEVER visit us), and our youngest’s 16^th birthday on New Years, and the stress of putting together an extra family party (to keep Q’s parents separate) and a meal for the visitors, we just had a vanilla weekend (boohoo).

Add to that Q’s post heavy stress reaction (diminished libido), all we really got done was waxing my pubes clean. For those that are interested, the hair down there is really starting to thin out, finally. I have heard that repeated waxing will finally get rid of all of the hair, and I am sure that is what Q would like.

If anyone has any tips for helping to get Q’s libido back on track (this happens occasionally when he is very stressed), I would love to hear from you.

And, for those waiting, NO the ebay paddle has not yet arrived (it is being shipped from Canada, so I am not too worried). And I still haven’t told Q nor have I decided whether to hold it back for his birthday in a couple of months.

Hopefully, I will have more to post soon. If nothing goes on between now and this weekend, I will definitely be deep into Spanking Frustration. Libido or not, I will probably hand Q an implement or two and present my bare butt. He has never been able to resist at least that.

Today's news - we have a new driver in our family. The youngest passed his driving test. Now I feel old and deserted. Oh well, just leaves more alone time for play (hehe). Gotta love that alarm beeper that lets you know when the kids come back in. WEG

YIPPEE!!!!

2004-12-30T14:15:00.000-06:00

The push is finally off at Q's job. They have everything done that they can do until they receive feedback reports from the outlying offices (some of which are known not to comply - but are on order from higher up to do so this time- hehe). And they have through Jan. to go through all of that. So no more excessive job stress.

Now, we can get back to settling into this lifestyle on a more consistent basis (at least without his stress and job interfering), and to find our rythmn, so to speak.

AND, he actually doesn't feel like he has to go in to work tomorrow (office closed) or the weekend for a change so we get a three-day weekend together. YAY!!! (Now if we can just convince the kids to go somewhere).

Can you tell how absolutely ecstatic I am? Plus, he is going to get (sometime soon) some comp time as well. (Jumping for joy here)

So don't be surprised if you don't hear from me again until Monday. It will all depend on what Q is doing/wants to do.

Everyone have a great weekend and NEW YEAR.

Comments please

2004-12-30T13:36:00.000-06:00

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

WOW! I just added the haloscan with their (I guess) new auto-installer. Is that ever cool and no-brainer easy. I love it.

After surfing blogs for awhile, I noted that a lot of people use the haloscan, and realized that it is much easier to leave comments (than the blogspot log-in screen).

Unfortunately, doing this deleted my existing comments (sorry folks). But hopefully this will encourage (hint hint) more people to leave comments as well.

Uh Oh! I've done it now....

2004-12-29T23:50:00.000-06:00

Have you ever gone out on ebay just to look around because you were bored and bid on something at the minimum bid only, knowing you would probably be outbid, but that it didn't really matter?

Well, I am no so stupid as to actually bid on something I didn't want, nor would I make a bid higher than I would actually be willing to pay, but I did just what I said above. And won the thing. (Don't worry, just $15) I just figured someone would outbid me and I wasn't worried - win or lose.

But now Q gets a surprise. Guess I'll save it for his birthday. Not sure I should have done this coz it looks nasty. (What is it with us spankos and our fascination with new implements anyway? I mean, we constantly buy stuff for our Tops to use on us, as if they really needed a new toy of pain)

What is it you say? Well, after reading some posts on a forum about the 'novelty' paddles ebay had (some really cheap), I went surfing and found this one - or at least one just like it. (I'm not endorsing them, just showing you. Will let you know when it arrives and if it is worth it, as it looks like they may be selling on ebay for at least awhile).

Anyway, at least I won't be in trouble coz it is my ebay money in my account to spend, after all. Although I am quite sure Q will remind me (hehe) to be more careful on ebay in his own special way, once I give it to him and tell him the story behind it. (Will let you know in a few months).

Oh, to let you know, I replace Q's favorite $3 bathbrush today, although I am sure there won't be any use of it until this weekend. I just dropped it into the toybox.

And, after re-soaking the canes to Q's specifications today, I noticed him looking at them with 'that look' (you girls know what I mean), so this weekend could prove to be fun (if the kids are gone that is) WEG.

Hmmmm, maybe a nice warm-up with CB, and then more intense with his bathbrush, and then to the canes for a flight to heaven. I mean, I have been really good all week - no need for discipline here. Oooops, here I go fantasizing again and there are still two more days until the weekend. I feel spanking frustration setting in....

Blindfolds??

2004-12-28T15:46:00.000-06:00

Just a quick note here to bring you up on the latest 'threat' in my life.

After pulling out the rattan canes to give them their soaking, I of course cleaned out under the bed. I ran across a small 'cat' which I had not seen before (yes, I will admit I am curious as to what Q was using that 'bit' so much), but the canes did need to be soaked - really.

When Q came in last night, he noticed the canes in the bucket and reminded me to get them put up before our son empties the trash tonight. I assured him I would, and then asked him about the 'cat' - if it was the one he had used.

He, in no uncertain terms, informed me that I didn't need to know and his tone told me that if I continued to question him, I would get another spanking and that I wouldn't like it.

He then mentioned blindfolding me so that I couldn't look. Yikes.

Hmmmm, wonder if he really will. Will I like it? Or will it scare the $#!? out of me? I have to admit that I am curious....

The Xmas one....

2004-12-27T14:45:00.000-06:00

The evening started with us going to our bedroom to play, after the boys left. Lots of cuddling and titty-gasms quickly followed, and at this point I was going through the phase in my head of 'I just want sex not a spanking - no I want a spanking - no I don't really want a spanking, just sex' of what I call spanko schyzophrenia. I still haven't totally figured out what it is with us spankos that makes us go through this. Luckily I have a wonderful husband that is quickly learning what I need (no matter what I say) and who lovingly delivers.

I would never have imagined five months ago, when I suggested this lifestyle, that he would take to it so quickly and learn so fast. I know now that I am 'wired' for spanking, but it is so wonderful that Q is also 'wired' as my perfect loving Top.

Then, Q got out of the bed and stood beside it, and told me to roll over (actually meaning for me to present butt) but I playfully 'rolled over' like a dog instead, leaving me in perfect position to take his hard cock in my mouth, which I promptly did.

Since he was originally ready to spank (and I was being 'bratty), he positioned my legs so that he could take the bamboo backscratcher and start thwacking at my inner thighs and pussy (thank goodness he couldn't get a full swing from that position), leaving my inner thighs well scorched and giving me one orgasm by swatting and playing with my clit, all while I was giving him a blow job. Then he moved to spanking the nipple on my one exposed breast.

After the bj, Q went to the bathroom and commanded me to present my butt in position.

At that time he discovered the newly acquired Cracker barrel paddle-ball paddle and the Vermin bath brush (he knew they were there, just hadn't put them to use yet). He pulled out the CB (which still had the ball attached), and started stinging my bottom with it. He then rolled up the string on the ball so that he could attempt to play ball while paddling. It was hilarious. However, he didn't like the grip on it and has decided we need to take care of that, but hasn't quite decided what he wants to do.

While using it, he alternated from hard slow smacks to rapid fire smacks. I can see where this can be both painful and erotic, depending on how it is used (and I can't wait for a purely play session). I probably got at least 30 with it, warming my butt nicely, before he moved on.

He then pulled out the Vermin. He decided that he doesn't like it as well as the one we broke previously. It's not as well balanced, the grip isn't as good for him, and it has a smaller business area, and the handle is shorter. Don't get me wrong, I think he does like it (probably because I don't), just not as well as the other one. So it's off on another shopping trip to replace the old one. This time I'll look closer at the wood grain itself, so hopefully it won't break. I may have to take my time though WEG.

Vermin strokes were about 15 per cheek and five per thigh, and varied in intensity (that thing really hurts on the sit spot, and leaves bruises when used hard).

Thanks to Patty, for the next step (I think). Q mixed up the glycerin/water mixture to try out and sprayed my bottom down, soaking it well. He then pulled out the heavy holey oak school paddle and set to my punishment, carefully reminding me of all of my misdeeds. As this paddle is heavier, it usually leaves my bottom 'rubbery' from impacts. After four moderate strokes with it, he checked my bottom to see if the mixture was working, and it indeed was. So he continued with four more (hard this time) strokes, again checking my bottom afterwards for hardening.

As the glycerin was doing its job, and the wetness was really making it hurt (and me yelp), he decided to continue with the paddle with four more really hard two-handed strokes, which left me absolutely breathless. Q stopped to assess the damage (this paddle leaves blisters and sometimes breaks the skin slightly because of the small holes). Unfortunately (or fortunately - haven't decided) for my bottom, the glycerin worked to Q's approval, so I have a feeling I may be in for a lot more from heavier implements for punishment. Remarkably, I think the glycerin almost eliminated any bruising from the paddle, which usually leaves pretty heavy bruises, especially when used to the severity that it was used this time.

Q then moved back to the Vermin (bathbrush) really letting me have it with it, concentrating heavily on my sit spot and thighs for about thirty strokes. He then started playing a bit, using the bristles to gently tease all the spanked areas. Then another 20, then bristles again, and another 20 and bristles again. Wow, this is a headrush of sensations.

He then grabbed the large paint stirrer for about a dozen, but decided that wasn't getting the results he wanted, so he moved on.

Next was the flexi-ruler, and it didn't take him long to have me really yelping from it. I honestly can't tell you how many, but it was well over 50, and my butt and thighs were way past being on fire by the time he finished. He then commented that he needed a yardstick out of the same material (yikes).

When I turned back to see what he was using, he told me not to do that anymore - that I didn't need to know unless I could feel the difference.

"I don't want any of my favorites showing up missing," he informed me.

"Like I would really do that?" I retorted.

"Well, ONLY once," he replied, snickering.

Needless to say I knew very well what that meant.

Then came an all too short, but sensual flogging with the leather flogger. He gave a few sharp strikes with it, but it was mostly sensual across my back, buttocks, inner thighs and pubis, until I had a nice orgasm. A wonderful break for a mixed punishment/pleasure session indeed.

Having been admonished to not look, the next implement was (I am 99% positive) was the lexan paddle for about 20.

Then he moved to the crop on my back for about 20.

At least that is what I thought at first. My only glimpse out of the corner of my eye was it is black and about the length of the crop. But I don't think it was the crop. It hurt a helluva lot more than the crop ever has, and really had me screaming and struggling out of position. I think Q bought a new toy that he hasn't yet let me see. I am guessing it is a wicked cat. Anyway, I haven't yet seen it, just felt it and it bites and stings like hell, yet amazingly doesn't really leave any marks for all the biting it does. Will let you know when I actually get to see it. By this point I was starting to shake a bit.

Q then moved back to the Vermin for about another 20, just to make sure my entire backside was crimson and that no spots had been missed. He then gave me one really hard smack with the vermin on each thigh, which quickly left two dark oval bruises.

Leaving me in position, he then moved to my hot backside, to bounce off my bum for awhile. WEG

I do love the feel of his pubes on my raw bottom. There is just something so erotic about it, even if it is slightly painful.

Being the good dom, he finished me off by applying arnica and lotion to my well used backside, while admiring his 'artwork' on my bum.

We followed with a long cuddling and loving session and me thanking him for a good spanking session that I both deserved and needed. By that time we were both too tired for anything else, and we just fell asleep snuggled close.

However, Sunday morning I awoke, still horny from the night before, and ready for some long lovemaking. Q promptly complied, giving me several titty-gasms and then moving down on me for oral sex. After giving me a couple of orgasms with his luscious tongue, he decided to bite and pull on my clit to bring me to another pain/pleasure orgasm.

He then got out of bed, making me think that he was going to spank me yet again. But no, this time he just guided me to the edge so that he could insert his throbbing cock into me and make love to me standing up, so he could have full access to my breasts as well. Numerous orgasms later, his knees were tired so he joined me on the bed again and I finished him off with a blow-job.

We cuddled together in the bed for most of the morning (and early afternoon) just enjoying each other and the love we share. What better way to spend the day after Xmas. I'm all aglow.

I'm Getting a Xmas spanking...

2004-12-25T19:06:00.000-06:00

I know there hasn't been much going on on the blog lately, what with me being sick and Q's workload (hours & stress). We just haven't had much time for any kink :(

Well, tonight we have a date for a reckoning (and hopefully some hot sex), after the kids are off.

Q is taking a nap right now, so that he is well rested to 'take care of business' so I know I am in for it. I know, I am a spanko anyway and I will admit that part of me is actually looking forward to it, but I do have some 'debts' to pay for from this last week, so I know that it won't all be a 'fun' spanking.

Debts you say? Well, four seat-belts (no I didn't get a ticket, just forgot in the rush of xmas and owned up to it), 1 other minor one, and two for breaking the cardinal rule of getting into bed with clothes still on (well it really has been cold and I honestly thought I would be getting right back up anyway - but yeah, I know I really shouldn't have). At least I didn't make him mad at me today as well.

However, yesterday was my big cooking prep day, and I lost my temper while doing meringue. Q said that if he hadn't been up to his elbows in cutting grapes, that he would have hauled me to the bedroom right then, and that if I had had one more outburst he would have anyway - irreguardless that there were pies in the oven. Luckily I managed to get it back under control. Instead, he just gave me the 'warning look.' So I guess I have that one to pay for as well (ouch).

So tomorrow, you should have a pretty good 'tail' to read (haha). Not to mention, that 'vermin' has arrived and not yet been used, as well as the addition of the infamous Cracker barrel paddle to the collection, that has yet to be tested as well.

Yes, xmas was good, but I am glad it is over. It's nice to see family, but only in small doses for most of ours. I won't bore you with those details.

After having spent most of the early morning snuggling in bed with Q, and having several 'titty-gasms' at his hands, I must admit that I am really looking forward to tonight, snuggled safe in his arms, with his cock tight inside of me, after a long spanking session - even if a good part of it is going to be a severe punishment. I deserve (and admittedly need) the reckoning, but even more, I need him inside me afterwards for that special closeness that it brings.

I love Q soooo much, and I have definitely missed him over the past couple of weeks with our screwed up schedules/illness. And hopefully I will have him back after his work project is finished at the end of the year (yay, only one more week).

His reaction to my temper flare yesterday, re-affirmed that he is still with this lifestyle 100 percent (yay), it is just that recently life has gotten in the way. Oh well, we all have to make adjustments occasionally and just learn to go with the flow.

Back in a day or two...

12 Days of Spanking

2004-12-23T13:41:00.000-06:00

Can you think of a better way to spend a holiday week?

Since Christmas is quickly sneaking up on us I thought I would post this spanko version (last verse only) of the 12 days.

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas, my true love spanked me;

Twelve with the furry paddle,
Eleven with the flogger,
Ten with the leather rose,
Nine with the hairbrush,
Eight with the crop,
Seven with his belt,
Six with the cane,
Five lightly with the CB,
Four with the tawse,
Three with a switch
Two with vermin
And one with the nasty lexan

Of course leaving us smiling and ready to face whatever stress the day(s) might bring with a grin, and bringing the holidays in with "rosy cheeks".

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

2004-12-23T11:48:00.000-06:00

Am finally able to breathe normally again and am well but now into the Xmas rush time.

Not much has been going on around here with me being sick. But I will be back after xmas.

Have a HAPPY AND SAFE HOLIDAY everyone.

Jayda

Been Sick - Arrrrgggghhhh!

2004-12-17T16:04:00.000-06:00

I have been sick since last Sunday (bad cold, sinus infection, coughing). Am feeling a bit better so there should be more posts this weekend.

Later

Breaking implements – Again!!

2004-12-11T13:31:00.000-06:00

I am a happily spanked wife tonight (Fri). (Long post, with juicy details)

I had come to a decision due to Q’s work load, stress level, and project deadlines, to not mention anything about spanking (or any kink) or even sex until after the New Year (his project deadline). However, if he brought it up, that was OK. I would still be totally available to him whenever he wanted me.

Having come to this decision, I was pretty much resigned to ‘no play’ until later. I really didn’t want the burdens of DD/Ds weighing on him right now (because it can place burdens on the SO to maintain the relationship).

Well after dinner, and some teasing about how Q was reading my mind, I asked him what I was thinking at that moment. He replied with an evil grin, “That you want a spanking.”

I quickly replied, “No,” much to his surprise. That I was thinking about us having the evening alone, and if he wanted something to do and felt like it, that it would probably be a good time to ‘wax’ my privates. He kind of ho-hummed to this idea, so we continued to watch TV and talk.

When I walked by his chair on my way to the bathroom, I leaned over to kiss him, and received a severe nipple pinching. He continued to pinch until I had two orgasms, and then he pulled me to my knees by my nipple, exercising his domliness. I asked him if this is what he wanted from me – sitting at his feet – he smiled and nodded. So after going to the bathroom, I returned and sat at his feet for a while. This was his unspoken method of getting me into the submissive mood that he wanted me in for what was yet to come (and I was so totally oblivious).

I told him that even though I was a spanko, that didn’t necessarily mean that I was always in the mood for a spanking. Then I put my foot in my mouth (coz I really wasn’t in the mood to be spanked). I also said that most of the time when I was not in the mood for a spanking, that was when I probably needed it the most due to hormones. Well, it wasn’t 30 minutes after this discussion, that I was ordered to the bedroom.

“If that is what you want to do,” I replied.

“Of course it is what I want,” Q replied in his stern dom voice, “Hop up and get in there, NOW!”

I jumped, almost running, to the bedroom.

As I had committed a couple of minor infractions this week, I knew that I was due for one (now that we had the house to ourselves), but I had thought he might let them float, since last weekends spanking was more of a fun & sex spanking than a punishment, and he had had such a hard week and still had to go back to work Saturday. And I had thought to free him of his commitments to DD for a few weeks anyway.

But (surprise to me) he had come home with full intent to spank me this evening. We have gotten into a pattern of taking advantage of Fridays (because the kids are out) to do most spankings if he hasn’t had time (or the opportunity with kids underfoot) or felt like dealing with them during the week. And, if I have been good, then it is a Good Girl spanking for fun instead.

As one of the infractions was a repeat of last weeks (and a third offense to boot), he had already decided that this was not going to be a fun spanking, and he was going to practice domming as well, to check my level of submissiveness to his word. (I think he is really getting the general gist of this lifestyle and has no intention of letting it slide - yay)

When we got into the bedroom, he said “Strip slut, and get over here.” While that command from him generally turns me on, I think this was the first time I intentionally undressed a bit slowly (albeit I did undress) to put off a spanking (as I said, I wasn’t in the mood). As I was undressing, Q pulled the toybox out and placed the entire box on the dresser. I then wondered exactly what he had in mind.

After I stripped and went to the bathroom, I placed pillows on the bed in spanking position and then I moved to stand in front of him, my eyes looking at the floor in submissiveness. Q pulled me to him, placing clothespins on both nipples making sure from my reactions, that they were pinching sufficiently. I glanced over at the bed, hoping I had placed the pillows far enough apart, that my tits would drop between them.

As I started to move towards the bed, Q said to stand there, and stand still. He then pulled out the bondage ropes that he had purchased long ago (but never used) and demanded that I put my hands in front of me. I started to shake a bit (mostly from nervousness about the bondage, but some in anticipation as well) as he was carefully wrapping them around my hands and tying them firmly together.

He then guided me to the bed, with the rope, and pulled it across the bed pulling me down into the pillows. I found at this time that I had made a bad choice in pillow placement, because the clothespins were now exerting a lot of pressure on my nipples, causing me to moan a bit. He grinned at this and continued to tie off the end of the rope to the legs of the bed.

After he finished tying the rope as tight as he wanted, Q felt of my hands and asked if the ropes were too tight because my hands were cold, and I assured him they were fine, that it was probably just nerves making my hands cold. Satisfied, Q moved around to start the spanking.

Q didn’t start with a warm up either. It was immediate and hard and during the spanking he moved through most of the implements in the toybox giving me at least ten strikes (sometimes more except, of course, the heavy school paddle (3 1/2 x 16 on the business end, 3/4" solid oak w/holes) which he kept to 2-4 because of the weight and severity) with each change. The implements excluded from this spanking were the canes, thin whippy things (mini-blind rod), flogger, and crop.

In my position, I couldn’t exactly tell what he was using, but I recognized the feel of most. He started with the heavy leather punishment strap. He then moved on to the heavy large leather paddle, the heavy school paddle, the belt, the 5gallon paint stirrer (giving me a bit of a break), back to the school paddle, the lexan paddle with holes, then the light stingy wood paddle (which gave me a bit of a break until he broke it on me), then the school paddle. He rarely stopped for any time in between other than the time it took him to change implements. And I was actually pretty close to crying, I think.

At this point he did stop for a minute to check and squeeze on my bottom (probably since he was using the school paddle, and the size and weight of this one can leave heavy marks). Then he pulled out the viper tipped belt strap and started on my back. This one got me to rolling a bit (my legs were not tied down) and he used it on my sides to 'encourage me' back into position.

Needless to say, I was not at all quiet during most of this, and was a bit breathless by the time he retired the viper and starting to shake slightly, only partly from cold. Even though my legs were not tied down, I was doing a fair job of not lifting them too much because of the bruising incident from the mini-blind rod.

Q then got the flexi-ruler and intensely whipped me with it for about 20 rapid fire hard slaps on my thighs, before he finished up with more from the lexan, the school paddle, paint stirrer, and finally the heavy leather.

While most of this is estimated, I do know (saw the clock) that he spanked me for at least 15-20 solid minutes.

He then untied me. I continued to lie on the bed, as he had not instructed me to get up. Q checked my bottom again, and then proceeded to apply a Ben-gay type ointment and arnica to my reddened and bruised bottom, while he checked the ‘damage’. He then showed me the paint stirrer, which had some tiny specks of blood on it. We decided those were probably from the few ‘scratches’ that remained from last weeks bath brush breaking incident.

Yes, the ointment did burn my already stinging bum, but we use it also to help increase blood flow and minimize long-term bruising. As well as intensifying the after effects of spanking for emphasis.

< style="font-family: arial;">Afterwards, Q motioned me to stand up and come to him. He held me for a while, removing the clothespins after a bit, and telling me he loved me. I thanked him for the spanking (even though I hadn’t wanted it) as we cuddled. He noticed I was still slightly shaking. But now it was from cold, as the fan was blowing across my bottom with the ointment on it, and I told him that.

As I went to the bathroom, I looked at my bottom. It is now heavily marked with lots of red welts and spots, some of them marking the edges of implements, some bruising and a couple of blisters as well. (Maybe later, I will get the courage, and permission, to post pictures, but for now you will have to just enjoy descriptions) The ratio of marked to unmarked is probably 60/40. I know I will enjoy sitting on these ‘hugs’, as a reassurance of his love for me, for at least several days.

We also decided that we don’t like pine. It breaks too easily. Although we will probably keep the paint stirrers as they are so light, breaking them won’t cause a problem. I have been instructed to sand and lightly varnish them however.

And, tomorrows chore is to go to Cracker Barrel (done) and pick up their famous paddle-ball paddle to replace the stingy homemade one that he broke.

Afterwards, he lamented the loss of one of his favorites – the bath brush. I assured him that the replacement was ordered and that it was maple, so it shouldn’t break so easily (I am dreading this one, from the stories I have read). I was actually quite relieved that it had not come in because it would have added to his repertoire, and I probably wouldn’t be sitting at all with the use of all of the above and Vermin (nicknamed because it comes from the Vermont Country store) too.

About an hour after the spanking, the effects sunk into my brain, and I realized that I indeed did feel better for it (even though I had not wanted it). So I thanked him again, for taking care of me and my needs so well.

Also let him know, that if it had been four or five days from now (full hormonal pms crap), that I would have probably fought him more. He quickly assured me that I would get an even harsher spanking if I protested. Hopefully that will make me stop and think before protesting too much, and that this spanking, will have put my hormones on a more even keel, as it so often does.

As it is, sitting (and typing this) is done in short stints as my bottom is still quite stingy. Hmmm, and to think that I figured not to get spanked again until after the New Year WEG. That’s what I get for thinking that I might be deprived.

Spanking Lets me Focus

2004-12-09T21:47:00.000-06:00

Not much to blog about here and there may not be until after the New Year thanks to Q's escalating job pressures.

However, I will try to keep my loyal readers entertained with some random thoughts (generally about the lifestyle and spanking) that tend to run through my head. At least a few times a week.

As I am tired tonight, here are some thoughts I had written down a couple of months ago, when I was giving serious thought as to why I thought that spanking was good for me (not just the fact that I liked it, WEG)

Spanking gets me focused into my own head. As a women, your mind tends to go in a dozen directions at once. The fact that spanking forces you to focus by the very aspect of just dealing with the pain coupled with the assault on the large amount of nerves through that erogenous zone, tends to shut your brain down from thinking about any other issues in your life. This is a good thing!

From experience, I know that even with fantastic straight sex with my beloved partner, I still have moments where other thoughts ‘intrude’ into this intimacy (kids, grocery list, etc). But, a good spanking session, coupled with a fantastic lovemaking session, tends to let me focus on the ‘oneness’ of me and my beloved. More so than I have ever been able to before. Even beyond the intimacy, I can’t help but think that this is good for the woman’s mind as well.

MRI’s show, that while a male can shut down the majority of his active brain (i.e. when you ask him what he is thinking about and he says nothing – he may very well mean it. This is almost incomprehensible for most women.), a woman can very rarely accomplish this feat. So perhaps, in addition to the endorphins/oxytocin aspect, a good spanking session actually allows a women’s brain some much needed rest from the day to day ramblings of the babbler within.

It's good for the spanko....

2004-12-08T01:24:00.000-06:00

When her hubby comes home from a bad days work, and even though he is not interested in giving her a full-blown spanking, he smacks her across the tight leggings she is wearing all sprawled out on the bed. And as she responds to his grin with an "Mmmmmm" he then responds by picking up the acrylic stick from the mini-blinds and gives her a quick, but firm twenty as he watches her squirm to keep from being vocal (because the boys are in the next room), and laughs in amazement at the new 'kink' they both share and enjoy, all before his welcome home kiss.

Do ya think maybe he overcame his fear of this implement? WEG It has now found permanent residence in the toy box, and I certainly hope to never find myself at the receiving end of a 'punishment' with it. That is for sure!

Sorry, that's all the kink here for the evening. Just lots of cuddling and video games (darn those boys for getting me started again).

What was it with the bath brush this week?

2004-12-07T01:56:00.000-06:00

As I suspected, Q nor I were neither one in the mood for playing Sat. night, so we just went to bed a bit early for us, but not before a titty-gasm. (Q laughs, saying he has now created two more ‘clits’ for me).

Well, I can’t stay in the bed more than 8 hours or I just get too stiff, so I got up and had myself some coffee Sunday morning. I then decided that Q had probably had enough sleep, so I crawled back in bed with him and woke him up (early for him – oops, hehehe).

WEG. I then told him that I had been a naughty horny little slut for waking him up. He caught the not-so-subtle hint.

After he got up and cleaned up a bit, he came back to the bed and smacked me a few times with his hand on my naked bottom. He then pulled me over, dropping my legs over the edge of the bed while simultaneously pulling the toy box out.

In the position I was in, I had no idea what toy he was pulling out, but I soon found out. It was the dreaded bath brush! Not my idea for a fun spanking.

But in all fairness to Q, I was actually due a reckoning for several minor infractions during the week that we hadn’t had time to settle up from. Plus, I was due a fun spanking for meeting a challenge as well. So Q combined it, because of all the time constraints we had this week.

By using the bathbrush (ugh – punishment), and taking breaks for rubbing and finishing with hot, wonderful sex, Q managed to take care of all in one shot, so to speak.

I actually ended up getting whacked with the bb about 80 times, in sessions of ten, and then rubbing and teasing with the bristle side. And he focused a lot on the sit spot, so I would have ‘hugs’ from him for a few days as well. He finished me off with ten from the dreaded lexan, as a pointed reminder to behave.

We then topped the session of with hot, wonderful sex. It’s amazing how good it feels to have your hubby’s pubes grind up against and pound against a freshly spanked bottom, while you are still in ‘spanking’ position WEG.

Afterwards as I was admiring his ‘work’ in the mirror (as I usually do), I noticed there were about eight cut-like marks on my bottom. I then went to the toy box and pulled out the bath brush (Walmart cheapy), and noticed that Q managed to split the wood on the bath brush while using it.

After we looked at it (looks to be cheap pine), and my bottom, I was given a directive to go order one from the Vermont Country store, which I did. The bb happens to be one of Q’s favorites because it doesn’t take much effort from him to elicit a scream from me.

So there will be no need for a verminclause to visit here this year. And, since Q likes to try out new implements immediately, I am sure there will be another ‘tale’ to tell later this week, depending on shipping time (I definitely did not rush it – I mean he didn’t say to, really).

Anticipation and then life

2004-12-04T13:16:00.000-06:00

Q came in from work Thursday night, in what I can only describe as a ‘mood’. He was obviously frustrated, but the kids were home so we didn’t get to de-stress him with spanking. Instead, he, our youngest, and I played an Everquest based PS2 adventure game, that they drug me into.

Background here, I can be a real video game addict and have avoided them for the last five or so years because I have so much else to do. But the two of them really wanted to get me into this, so I did.

Anyway, from the moment Q walked in the door, he was ‘wearing’ his dom boots and the intensity of him domliness increased through the evening. It started by his commanding me around, and then, every time we were alone, he would grab me by my nipples and start pinching, knowing I couldn’t scream out loud because of the kids. None of these times did he ever bring me to orgasm. He would also lay really heavy passionate kisses on me to tease me.

One time he even grabbed me by the hair and bent me down in the kitchen to give him a one or two minute blow job, while the kid was in the bathroom.

When we finally went to bed, it was really too late to do anything because Q needed to get to sleep. So we just did some sexy cuddling, with Q finally giving me the tit orgasm that I was needing so bad by that point.

I was so turned on with his domliness, I was practically crazy, but I behaved myself for his sake, just looking forward to the next day.

Well, Friday was definitely NOT what I had hoped for. But that is ok, we’ll just deal with it and move forward.

Q came home from work in pain with his jaw almost locked up from tension (he has TMJ and when he is REALLY stressed, it settles in his jaw).

Consequently, there was no playing. I just took care of him and tried to help him to get his jaw to relax and some of the pain to go away.

He was so sweet too, apologizing to me for a disappointing evening. Like it was his fault. I assured him that I was fine and that there would be another time and that it was more important to take care of him that to play.

Unfortunately, he had to go back into work this morning (I left him a sweet note on the door that he would see as he was leaving). And his dad is coming over this evening, so who knows if we will have time, or want to play this evening. After yesterday I will really try to not aggravate him/his dad so that I don’t add to his stress. And I sure don’t want another punishment like the last time I did that.

It’s really a bummer when life gets in the way of intimacy, but we’ll survive. Hopefully there will be more tales (hehe) to tell soon.

Back, finally

2004-12-02T17:18:00.000-06:00

I hope that this is the last time (at least for a long time) that computer problems will keep me from posting. I won't go into them here, but I have had plenty!

Combine computer problems, with pms, and a white man's holiday that I don't particularly like anyway, plus rushing around trying to get my oldest enrolled in college (with his special needs testing, appeals, letters, etc), and that all really threw me out of the loop and into a 'funk' of a mood.

Add to that, dear Q decided to get un-domly for awhile (guess he was in a mood too), and didn't give me what I probably needed - lots of spankings ;-( and I guess that pretty much sums up the last few weeks. Actually, in talking to a few other people, they have also had an 'off' or 'weird' few weeks as well. Maybe it was just something in the air.

However, Saturday after t-giving, Q decided that enough was enough, and that I needed a good spanking. Yay! He found a new implement. The plastic stick used to turn window blinds, that I had left off one and laid on the dresser and forgotten to put back.

Oh shit! That will teach me to be forgetful. That damned thing hurts and stings like hell. It felt like he was making hamburger out of my butt after just a short while. I even called out our "slow down, give me a breather" safeword. That was the first time I had used any safeword in months.

After giving me a minutes break, Q decided to move to my thighs instead, as the rod didn't seem to be marking unusually bad. However, the rapid-fire technique that he often uses, started leaving heavy marks on my lower thighs - and quickly.

This panicked him, so he called a quick stop to the session and made me sit on ice/heat in 10 minute rotations for awhile. After this, of course, he didn't feel like following through with any sex play.

I will say that the rod did leave some heavy welts, swelling, and bruises that did need some attention. What was amazing to me is that it actually hurt worse on areas that didn't leave much, if any marks, than it did on the thighs. Strange.

I think that implement will probably be used for 'bottom only' strikes, if not completely retired.

Since that, activity has been a bit curtailed. I think Q felt really bad about it. I assured him that it was OK, and that it was just something that will sometimes happen with our spanking, especially when using something new.

We did have some great sex this past weekend, and last night as well. Last night started with him commanding his 'slut' to give him a blow job. I didn't realize how 'deprived' I had been or how hungry I was for him until we started. But it was great. I must have had 4-5 orgasms while giving him head.

Geeze, it is sure nice to be back into the swing of things instead of off in a funk. Hopefully, that won't happen again - at least for awhile.

My goal here on this blog, is to post at least 2-3 times a week, so hopefully I will be keeping that up for you readers.

Have a spankingly great day!

Yay! I can post tonight.

2004-11-16T01:20:00.000-06:00

I actually tried posting once over the weekend, and again last night, but blogger wouldn't even let me get to the dashboard, so I gave up. I also did some html editing and saved it, but it doesn't seem to have actually taken. Will be doing a little more over the next few weeks, so if the blog has appearance problems for anyone, please let me know so that I can adjust it.

Will try to catch you up on the general wierdness of the weekend later, but here is tonights post.

Actually, there is not too much to post tonight. Went to bed as usual, and after Q brought me to a couple of orgasms by pinching my tits, he decided that he wanted some action too, so we had nice, sedate, loving, vanilla sex.

Unfortunately, I am going through a 'dry' (vaginally) spell, which happens during menopause (and more often after, I understand), so we had to hit the KY. This is always annoying to me, especially when just a few days before I was dripping with juices.

Oh well, just one of the phases of life.

Learning and Evolving

2004-11-10T05:06:00.000-06:00

Thanks to things pointed out to me in emails from a several (wonderful) readers, I now have a deeper understanding of what was at play this last weekend.

For one, and I already knew this, Q is very patient. He capitalized on this by being patient and wise enough to let his own temper cool, before taking any real action. He used my own impatience to bring me to the submissiveness he needed before disciplining me, by making me own up to being the cause of the stress, and asking, no actually begging him to punish me.

I really wished he could have made me cry as well. I almost felt robbed, at the time, that I didn’t, that maybe I would feel better about everything if I had. But the lessons slowly soaked in anyway and as the realization of what all happened sets in, I am not sure crying would have brought me to this point any faster.

This weekend was not just an issue of punishment, but a HUGE lesson in submission as well. I was defiant, and the more I wrote of the story, the more I realized just what a brat I was being.

Patrick wrote:
"I've said to many a submissive that submission is easy as pie if it's just things you wanted to do anyway. The challenge is when you're made to do things you don't want to do, such as suffer a punishment, or having to learn patience ...."

This statement fits this past weekend so well, I just had to share it.

What I didn’t realize, was just how much my submission would grow from this interaction as well as the exercise of making myself write the story. When you write, you re-live. When you re-live, you can see your own mistakes more clearly. And I made plenty.

The whole lesson also was not to ‘fix’ me (I’m not broke, just growing), but to lovingly and quickly deal with the stressors that occur in our lives, especially when I have gotten on Q’s last nerve.

And I am really beginning to like (no not the harsh spankings necessarily) the quick resolve we can put on an issue that, before we chose this lifestyle, may have hung between us for a week or more.

But I can definitely say I love every bruise, blister, stripe and mark that now (temporarily) resides on my extremely sore backside as a result of this weekend because I know they were put there with love and understanding. And my oh my, how they made me grow ;)

Yes, we are definitely evolving here.

Patty writes about some of the issues of evolving DD relationships here that puts a lot into words much more eloquently than I can.

Tues 11/9

2004-11-10T01:37:00.000-06:00

As I didn’t get to see Q much yesterday, this evening was my time to submissively approach him to see if the issue of the weekend was really closed.

As I typed the story, I realized what he had actually said, and I knew I needed to ask him about it. What he said was that he had to quit because his arms and shoulders were tired. What he did not say was that he was finished. More on this a bit later.

Well, when he came in this evening and I greeted him, he said he had to go to his dad’s to help him do something on his computer (which we had already shown him how to do at least a dozen times before). This meant that he had to go back out into traffic, and spend and hour for a five-minute action on his dad’s computer.

I thought, oh great. He hasn’t had a great couple of days at work, and now he is having to deal with his dad. Better find the butt-wax, coz he’s probably going to want to de-stress on me when he gets back. And I still had to approach him about the above issue as well.

He asked me to have a marguarita ready for him when he returned. I did, and surprisingly when he got back, he didn’t seem too overly stressed. He sat down with his dinner and drink, while I finished up schoolwork with our oldest.

Well, unbeknownst to me, he had already made up his mind to give me a repeat performance of Sunday’s spanking if I hadn’t lived up to a challenge he had given me (to do a certain # of hours of school with the boys each day this month – more than usual because of college prep and the upcoming holidays). And, he was planning on doing this spanking irregardless of whether the boys were home or not.

After the boys had cleared out and we were relaxing in front of the TV, he informed me of this sentence, leaving no doubt in my mind that he would follow through in the future as well. Lucky for me (and my bruised/blistered bottom), I had met his challenge and passed the test (and trust me, I will continue to pass). I think that seeing me doing schoolwork with our oldest when he returned, was also a diffuser for any stress he may have been harboring.

It wasn’t long until I went to sit at his feet (kid’s gone). It was amazing to me how submissive I felt and how good that submissiveness felt to me. I absolutely adore this loving man. And I love the adoring smiles and the loving touches he gives me when I do this.

I think now, after all the exercises in submissiveness, that I am truly starting to feel it deep in my heart. It’s a warm, safe, contentment that I can’t fully put into words, but it is truly wonderful. Yes, this weekend really moved me forward into new realms of the relationship and my own submissiveness.

I now broached the topic of the weekend, telling him what he had said that left me to ask the question if it was finished, or did he have more for me. He smiled at me and assured me it was finished and closed, and gave me a wonderfully romantic kiss. We snuggled for a bit, then he had to get up.

Finished. Closed. I smiled and felt even warmer. Perhaps his dealing with his dad this evening helped with that as well.

As he passed the fridge, he saw that I had moved the sign (screw-up fairy). (This is our way of me letting him know I have messed up on one of our rules, so I don’t forget to tell him in the evenings chaos) I told him I had violated a seatbelt rule (but remembered before I got too far), and also that I hadn’t completed a sufficient amount of chores. He smiled a loving smile as he put it back in place and nothing more was said about it this evening. We’ll see if he calls me on it later this week.

When we went to bed for our evenings cuddle, I was already wet from my submissive feelings that had overwhelmed me earlier. We snuggled in each others arms, hugging tightly and kissing often. I told him I just wanted to crawl into him – you know that feeling when you are so close to your SO and cuddling tight, when you just want to make the two of you one. Q asked me if I did that, would it still be called masturbating? He can be such a smart ass.

Q started playing with my breasts, remarking how he loved how soft the skin was. Now, I was really getting wet.

As it was already pretty late and he had turned down a blow job for that very reason, I wasn’t going to try to seduce him. But he continued to play with my breasts and moving to my nipples, decided to give me an orgasm anyway. He can be sooo sweet, and I thanked him for it.

He wanted to cuddle much longer than usual, so we did. I think that I could die in that position and die very happy. Too soon, it was time for me to leave though, and let him get to sleep. I miss him already.

Here's the story - finally-below

2004-11-09T16:55:00.000-06:00

Hope you all enjoy it. Please let me know.

It is all true life, just put into story form. Actually, putting this into story form was a really good excersise for me in self-discipline. It also allowed me the opportunity to reflect further on all of the issues and events and realize that I still (as a good submissive) need to present myself to him and give him the opportunity to give a final closure to the weekend.

As for yesterday, well, I only got to see Q for about 5 minutes as I was busy running kids to events.

As you can see by the end of the story, things really aren't totally resolved. I'll address that with him, hopefully, this evening.

Looking forward to hearing from you readers. Advice is welcome too.

The Weekend

2004-11-09T13:39:00.000-06:00

Being the spoiled little submissive wife, Kiera was looking forward to the weekend with the kids gone (at least for Fri night and Sat morning). Unfortunately for her, Steve came home tired from the weeks work and went straight to bed for a nap.

Hoping he would wake up later, at least for something to eat, Kiera checked her emails and caught up on her online reading. By midnight, it was obvious Steve was gone for the night, so Kiera slipped into the bedroom, undressed and crawled into bed.

Saturday morning they both awoke refreshed, and after the mandatory trips to the bathroom, Kiera and Steve crawled back into bed together for some cuddling and fun. It started with Steve pinching and twisting Kiera’s nipples until she had several orgasms.

This was followed, by Kiera giving Steve a 30 minute blowjob, which was cut short by sinus issues. After clearing her sinuses, Kiera crawled back into the bed thinking Steve might want to finish off inside of her soaking pussy. He proceeded to play with her nipples some more, making them incredibly sore but giving her a couple of orgasms in the process. He also played with her bottom, pinching and teasing it as well.

Kiera played with his erection, which was rock hard. It usually was when he played with her tits, especially when she squealed a lot and then had an orgasm. But after his teasing her butt, Kiera was craving a fun spanking. "Spank me please, Daddy," she prodded in her best voice.

"Come here then," he said as he guided her across his lap.

Slap came his hand, followed by a cooing sound from Kiera. This was followed by several more, building in intensity until Steve popped his wrist.

Laying across his lap face down, Kiera couldn’t completely tell what Steve was doing with his movements, but soon heard the all to familiar rattle of him grabbing the bamboo back scratcher and she winced, knowing it’s bite all too well.

Smack came the first one as Kiera jumped slightly from the sting. Then smack, smack, smack, and Keira was starting to yelp from the sting. As Steve found his comfortable position, the spanking began in earnest.
Kiera’s continued to yelp and started to shift from side to side a bit in an effort to re-direct the blows when Steve seemed to over concentrate on one spot. She also raised her buttocks, so that he would have a better choice of other areas on her bottom as well.

The DD/Ds relationship that their marriage had recently evolved into told Kiera that she probably needed this type of spanking, but she didn’t necessarily like it at the time. What she had really wanted was a fun spanking. But, being the good wife, she submitted hoping that it would end soon, and be followed by some hot sex.

Steve kept up with the smacks for about 15 minutes, then guided Kiera back beside him in the bed to cuddle.
"Feeling better?" Steve queried, referring to their discussion that week of her hormones making her feel a bit crazy and out of sorts.

"Um hmmm," she replied, reaching down to grab Steve’s now hard penis in hopes of his wanting more play.
They cuddled for a few minutes, then Steve jumped out of bed. "I’m hungry," he stated.

Kiera was a bit disappointed, but dressed and followed him out of the bedroom anyway. After all, she had her orgasms first thing this morning, so she couldn’t really complain. And she definitely needed some coffee.

***

As she was drinking her morning coffee, their youngest boy came in to get his bowling ball and head off for his Saturday morning league with his grandfather and his best friend.

Kiera sat at Steve’s feet for a while, enjoying and encouraging his dominance in their newfound relationship. As she was settling back to enjoy the quietness of what was possibly their last two hours of solitude for the weekend, Steve said, "Let’s go watch. You know, to support him."

***

At the bowling alley, Steve and Kiera sat close together while they watched their son bowl, often getting looks from others as they grabbed each other’s bottoms in fun. Much to her dismay, Steve only allowed Kiera to go outside and have one cigarette though. He denied her second request, which she obeyed, albeit a bit frustrating.

After the league (their son’s team won all three of their games), Steve’s dad took the two younger boys back to his house and Kiera and Steve went home.

On both the drive to, and the drive home, Steve tormented Kiera by pulling on her tits. He especially enjoyed this when they were in traffic and she had to force herself to keep quiet.

***

Entering their house, Kiera headed to the kitchen to check the stew that she had refreshed and put on the stove to warm in case Steve’s father came over later to watch the football game, which he usually did, invited or not.

As his dad hadn’t mentioned anything, Steve called to see if he was coming over, enticing him with the prospect of stew and cornbread. He said he would be there when the boys had finished the game they were playing.

Kiera moaned silently to herself, knowing what she was going to have to endure for the day. She was a bit unusual, in that she enjoyed a good football game on the weekend. Kiera’s dad had been a coach, and she had played girls full pad football in highschool. Their team had even played a boys team as a challenge once, and won.

Steve’s dad, on the other end, had never played sports or even coached a little league team. So his comments during the game got on Kiera’s nerves, usually severely and to the point that Kiera left the room to watch the game in peace in another room.

This probably was at least a part of the reason Steve’s dad did this. To get her out of the room that is. It was no secret that he didn’t like Kiera. In fact he really didn’t like women period, thinking all they were good for was cleaning, cooking, and having babies. Yes, he was a total male chauvinist pig. It was no wonder he was divorced when Steve was six and had never found another woman to settle down with.

He was great to his grandkids, and to Steve. And he basically was good hearted, but his snobbish arrogant book smarts without any common sense very often put Kiera off. And he was rude and self-centered to top all that off.

By the end of the first quarter of the game, Steve’s dad had Kiera knotting her fists to keep from telling him to shut up. She went to the bathroom, slamming the bedroom door on the way. After going to the bathroom, she went to the office to check on the computer and see if it was through with the process it was doing, and returned to the living room to watch the game, determined not to let him get to her and to watch the game with her precious husband.

Having survived watching the game, with Steve’s generous interventions of talking with her to both ignore and override his father’s comments, Kiera fixed a container of stew for his father to take home.

But no, this wasn’t to be the end of it. Steve’s father decided to stay and watch the evening game as well. It was a game that Kiera and Steve wanted to see, but not a team that his dad even really cared about.

By the end of the first quarter, Kiera was totally agitated with his dad’s comments putting down the coaches and the players and generally being negative, which was his nature about everything anyway.

During the games, Steve had been running some clean up and update programs on the computer in his office so they had been checking on them periodically. This time, Steve took a particularly long time and his dad got up and started pacing across the living room, conveniently stopping periodically right between Kiera and the TV. Whether it was intentional on a conscious or subconscious level on his part, it still irritated Kiera.
Getting really frustrated and knowing that saying anything to Steve’s dad wouldn’t do any good, even if by chance he didn’t ignore her, Kiera joined Steve in his office to watch the game for a bit, sitting at his feet. "He is driving me crazy," Kiera exclaimed.

Steve gave her a knowing smile and nodded, "Yes, I know baby." After about 10 minutes, and getting a new process started on the computer they returned to the living room.

Steve’s dad continued his pacing, and when they returned began spewing negativity anew. Kiera couldn’t take anymore and bolted to the bedroom, closing the door loudly behind her for emphasis, to watch the end of the game.

By the time he finally left, all the good warm feelings that Kiera had harbored for the week were totally drained. Steve’s dad had done his conscious or unconscious self-appointed job of managing to make her feel worthless and crappy. So when Steve came into the bedroom to inform her that his dad was gone, Kiera’s mouth let loose on a somewhat controlled, but not completely, rant.

This was quickly brought to a halt by Steve and Kiera noticed his mood had changed as well.

Kiera knew that he didn’t like her to do this, but she was frustrated and wished for once he would just let her blurt out her rant and get it out of her system all at once, without taking it personally.

The rest of the evening was spent quietly with Steve brooding and cooling his own anger and Kiera feeling bad that she had shifted his mood with her rant.

I wish that he would just take me to the bedroom and give me a spanking to get it out of his system. Maybe that would help me get back into a decent mood as well, but I doubt it. I don’t even feel like being touched, and I certainly don’t want sex or spanked. Maybe it’s better this way. Kiera’s thoughts rambled for the evening. He knows his dad is a jerk. I wish I would just learn to keep my mouth shut, even when I really need to rant.

I know we owe it to him for all the help he has given us, but no amount of anything entitles someone to treat another person the way he treats me. Maybe it’s just me being oversensitive and perceiving it wrong, but it just doesn’t feel that way. Kiera shuddered thinking about it. Why do I just feel pure meanness from him towards me. I know Steve’s dad would say he is clueless if Steve or I even mentioned that to him, so it’s just no use. I just have to learn to ignore it, hard as it may be at times. For Steve’s sake, if nothing else.

When they went to bed, nothing was said. Sleep came fitfully to Kiera as her thoughts continued to wander.

***

The next morning when Kiera awoke uncomfortable from the position she had slept in, Steve was still asleep, so she let herself out of the bedroom quietly. She made her coffee, had her first cup and sat in her recliner with the heater on and fell back to sleep. She awoke when Steve came into the room several hours later, but she was still in a bad mood and definitely not feeling submissive – just cranky.

"Sorry, I had planned sausage gravy and biscuits for Sunday breakfast, but I am just not in the mood. I feel like crap," Kiera stated.

"Oh," Steve stated in a somewhat dominant tone raising his eyebrow and looking at her questioningly.

Kiera just didn’t care at that point and took advantage of his hesitancy in his dominant role and just shrugged her shoulders. She just continued to sit in her chair and pout over the previous days events. I know I shouldn’t be like this, but I feel like I am less than dirt today, and the whole thing just makes me want to cry.

After Steve got himself a drink and some banana bread, he came back into the living room and sat in his recliner. "Do I need to beat this mood out of you?" he asked.

"No," Kiera replied, thinking to herself I don’t want a damned spanking. I probably need it, in fact I know I need it but I am not going willingly. What I need is for him to drag me into the bedroom and lay into me, but I am sure as hell not going to ask for it right now.

Not picking up on her need for him to take control, Steve just sat there thinking about things. In a few minutes he got up to go do more work on the computer.

In the meantime, the kids had got up and left on a days fishing trip leaving the two of them alone in the house. When Kiera heard Steve go back into their bedroom she followed, laying on the bed while he brushed his teeth and took his vitamins.

"I’m sorry about yesterday. He just got to me," Kiera attempted a small apology, "And the looks he was giving me were just too much."

"I know he is an ass," Steve replied. "But I figure we owe him that much."

"I know, and I’ll try and do better," she replied realizing for the first time that this was actually a DD issue that they hadn’t discussed and that it was probably quite a spankable offense.

When they had first set up their first rules for stepping into DD, this hadn’t been on the table as something they were working on. But as the DD relationship progressed, Kiera had given Steve blanket consent to spank her for anything she did that upset him, irregardless if it was actually on the list of things that they were currently working on. She was now very torn between not wanting him to spank her for it and moving on, and wanting him to because she knew she deserved it.

When Steve came out of the bathroom, she jumped up quickly. She didn’t really want to give him open opportunity to spank her, and she need to go to the bathroom herself.

While Kiera was in the bathroom, Steve straightened out the bed, then crawled in himself in an invitation for her to join him. When she came out, she did just that, but left her clothes on in a kind of submissive defiance, but he didn’t say anything.

They snuggled and cuddled for a bit, then Steve began to play with her already painfully sore nipples. He played with first one breast, and then the other, pinching and pulling and bringing her very close to orgasm several times, and then stopping, leaving her frustrated as she tickled his crotch.

He finally brought her to one orgasm, quickly followed by another. After all the teasing, Kiera’s pussy was aching a deep, throbbing ache, to have him inside of her.

Steve then grabbed Kiera’s crotch hard, over her jeans, and brought her to a plateau. This move knocked Kiera into a bit more of a submissive mindset and she quickly removed her clothes so that she could be more easily accessed. Steve then moved to take one breast in his mouth to suck and bite, while pinching the other until she had yet another orgasm.

Kiera was now very wet, and her pussy was aching so bad for penetration, that when Steve began to tease her by lightly running his fingers all over her, she begged him to fuck her. "Baby, I’ll let you spank me as much and as long as you think I deserve for yesterday, if you will just fuck me afterwards," she almost cried.

This was all the opening that Steve needed to kick his dominance into action for he quickly hopped off the bed. "Ok. Move over here." He directed her to move laying lengthwise along the side of the bed with her head in the pillows.

Steve pulled out the tool/toy box and reached for the new belt. He hadn’t even seen it yet, as Kiera had bought it on a challenge from a forum she belonged to (they didn’t have a regular belt to use, so it had been a logical choice).

Kiera could tell what he grabbed by the sound of the buckle rattling. Not knowing whether to fear it or not, she just let herself look forward to the ‘feel’ of something new and different. By the time Steve had laid into her backside with the first couple of slaps, she was sure she didn’t like this tool at all.

After about 20 hard slaps, Steve paused to caress Kiera’s cheeks and to look for marks. He decided he liked this new tool because it didn’t leave heavy marking, and started again, only harder this time. After about 40 really hard slaps on her bottom and upper thighs, he paused, to again check for marks and to squeeze her fiery bottom as well.

Kiera had been crying out into the pillow after the second slap from the belt. One reason is because Steve like to hear her cry out (when the kids weren’t home and they were in private) so that he could judge his effectiveness and the other was because this damned belt was really hurting. After the second round with the belt, Kiera decided that Steve really was upset with her over yesterday’s events or he wouldn’t be using the belt quite so hard or so long.

The third round with the belt, Steve really put his arm into it for about 15 more. By this time Kiera was really screaming into the pillow that she had her face buried in. Grabbing her by her hair, he pulled her face up to check and see if she was crying. Noticing that she wasn’t yet crying, he kissed her softly on her lips, and then on her eyes, which had a few tears, and let her head back down, asking, "Are you OK?"

Nodding yes, she mumbled a breathless, "yes" to him as well. Realizing from his query, that he was planning to continue, Kiera wondered just how much more she had coming. Oh shit, I didn’t realize he was this upset with me. He has never laid into me for something that really pissed him off. OK. Just breathe. I can get through this. And maybe he’ll actually get me to cry as well.

Steve then pulled out the 25 cent implement – the five gallon paint stirrer – that was also purchased on the same challenge as the belt. He laid into her backside with it for about 10 strokes. Realizing from the lack of sounds from Kiera that it wasn’t getting the effects he was looking for, he dropped it back into the box and went for another implement.

Peeking from around the pillow, she noticed Steve pulling on of his favorite (and her least favorite) implements out of the box - the evil Lexan paddle with the blistering holes. Damn. My butt is already on fire. OK. I’ll handle it. "Shiiiiiiiittttt!!!!" Kiera screamed into the pillow as the first impact hit her bottom.

During the 30 plus from the Lexan paddle, Kierra squirmed a lot more, mostly from the pure pain from the implement, but also partly because Steve tended to move and focus some of his strikes with this implement to more tender areas such as the sit spot and the lower sides of her bottom and sides and insides of her thighs.

After the belt, Kiera was just happy he wasn’t putting full force into the paddle so she struggled to keep as still as possible, although she was anything but quiet.

When she heard him drop the paddle back into the box, Kiera hoped that this session was finally over and waited for his instructions to move. But no, over it wasn’t, as she saw him pull out the 30" x 3/8" dowel.

Burying her face into the pillow again, she was just thankful that it was just the dowel and not the rattan canes. The first strike of the dowel was hard, causing Kiera to moan/scream into the pillow, and a few tears to come to her eyes again. The next dozen came fast and quick in a rat-a-tat pattern that had her almost breathless.

Then Steve laid several across her upper back, and then another half-dozen on her upper butt cheeks, before finishing with four across her thighs. "My arms are getting tired. Guess I need to work out," Steve commented.

Hearing him put the dowel up, Kiera hoped this was almost over. But then she heard him reach in the box yet again. Then she felt the searing pain of the belt coming down across her upper thighs and lower buttocks for about 10 more strikes.

"Guess I’ll have to quit for now, my shoulder hurts," Steve remarked as he dropped the belt into the box and pushed it under the bed.

Steve still hadn’t brought Kiera to tears from a spanking. Maybe next time. He reached for the bottle of lotion and lovingly rubbed a healthy amount into her newly bruised and battered bottom.

When he finished, Kiera rolled over to meet his eyes, painfully working her bottom towards the edge of the bed for her reward.

"I didn’t promise you anything," he stated with half a smile and a stern voice as she starting playing with his not-so-hard penis with her toes.

Kiera realized that was true, he hadn’t promised her anything, and that maybe this type of spanking wasn’t a turn on for him. But she was almost desperate to feel his cock inside of her, so she continued to play with him and gave him a begging look with her eyes.

As he move his slowly hardening penis on top of her pussy, she pulled his hands to play with her tits. This almost always gets him hard fast she thought.

As he played with her tits, pulling on them until she squealed, he did indeed get harder. So he slipped his erection inside of her.

Kiera had her first orgasm quickly as he entered her while playing with her nipples, but soon realized this wasn’t quite the ‘fun’ session she was craving. Yes, his penis inside her was fulfilling that need, but somehow it just wasn’t quite as fun as a lot of their previous post spanking sessions had been.

They continued for about a half hour, Kiera having many orgasms at Steve’s expertise. He knew her body and how it responded well. At one point, he even slapped her inner thighs to a glowing pink, bringing her to an orgasm this way as well.

He pulled out well before he was ready to come, saying that his back and feet were hurting too much for him to be able to get off. Kiera promised she would make it up to him later, as he went to take a shower.

Laying on the bed while Steve was in the shower, Kiera then began to realize how much she had hurt him by her behavior the previous day and came to terms with the fact that she really deserved the spanking that he had just given her. When he came out she immediately apologized. "I’m sorry dear. I’ll try and do better with your dad, especially over the upcoming holidays."

When she went into the bathroom to look at her bottom, she realized just how sore she was when she sat on the toilet. As she exclaimed ‘Ouch’, Steve just grinned.

Coming back out, she went over to Steve, who was once again laying on the bed, and hugged and kissed him. "Thank you. I didn’t want it, but thank you for spanking me just the same. I love you so much," tears came to her eyes.

"I love you too," he murmured a reply, hugging her as she nuzzled his neck.

"This is just what you need to do when you are fed up with me babe," Kiera whispered to him. "It also gets your frustration out and lets us put the incident behind us, so to speak."

Steve smiled, "Well, puts it in perspective anyway."

***

Later that evening, Kiera spent a lot of time on the floor at Steve’s feet , irregardless of the bruising and blisters on her very sore bottom, paying proper obeisance to her Master. Feeling much better about things, she felt that she could now show Steve how much she truly loved him, and the warm feelings began to return inside of her.

Be Patient

2004-11-07T22:10:00.000-06:00

OK, my weekend didn't quite go as planned. But as an excersize for myself, I am trying to put it together in a story form for you all. It may be a day or two before I get it posted, so be patient with me. It will be titled THE WEEKEND, so watch for it.

Found the butt wax (he he)

2004-11-04T23:07:00.000-06:00

Following the subject of "Sometimes you just have to ask", I did just that tonight with Q. After a particulary crappy day, I was feeling very moody and out of sorts. So the first opportunity that I had, I sat at Q's feet. After doing this for awhile, I rested my head on his knee. This prompted him to ask if anything was wrong.

I replied that I thought that maybe I just needed him to strongly dom me for awhile and also that I probably needed at least one hard "just because" spanking (because my mood was so bad, because my attitude was off, because I wasn't getting things done like I should, because my hormones were raging due to the change, just because).

He quickly responded by grabbing my hair and pulling me to him for a crushing kiss, followed by a grin. As I was still sitting at his feet (he was at his desk working on the computer), he then pulled his cock out for me to suck on while he worked. From time to time he would grab my nipples and pinch and pull them until I came as well. When the project was finished, I went to the bedroom while he went to the kitchen to get a drink. He soon joined me in the bedroom, sternly asking me why my clothes were still on. I quickly shed them, apologizing to him, and stretched out on the bed on my stomach.

Q then pulled out the crop and began whacking me with it. It started hard and fast, making me yelp a lot, then he moved to lighter but quicker pops. He moved back and forth between lighter/fast smacks and slower but much harder smacks, as he stood beside the bed playing with himself. It wasn't long until I felt him cum on my back. He proceed to 'wax' my bottom with his cum - a delicious use for it, I must say. I definitely like this 'wax', especially applied with his loving hands and tender touch.

Sometimes it pays to ask for what you need, especially when you are trying to get back into the routine after a vacation. I left Q a sweet note for him to find tomorrow morning, thanking him for his much needed attentions.

I still can't believe how lucky I am to have such a great husband/lover/dom/master/bestfriend/soulmate all rolled into such an unbelievable package. I am the luckiest woman in the world, and so happy it is unreal. Who would have thought that after 20 years it gets this much better (when it was damned good to start with).

Shopping

2004-11-03T22:14:00.000-06:00

Monday night Q commanded that I go out on Tues and get the parts necessary for working on my computer.

Tuesday, I did as he requested. The day actually ended up being a very productive day (got two days worth of work done on my list) as far as our requirements for me in our DD list of things to do.

I actually took a little side track while I was at wally world. I had read on a forum about a $20 Wal Mart challenge for buying implements. And, crazy as it may seem (what is it with us subbies that we actually like to buy new implements) I decided to do just that. I figured with his upcoming stress situations that my dear Q might just like to have some new things in the tool box.

The first thing was a good heavy leather belt ($10). We only have one, which Q fashioned into more of a strap with a vipers tail end (and I really hate the vipers tail). The second was two 5 gallon paint sticks at $.28 each. The third was what is called a 'flexi-ruler' which I have heard mentioned as well ($1.47). And, last, but most probably not least, I saw a driveway marker with a reflector on top ($1.87). Cutting the marker off the top leaves a long, whippy, plastic cane. Since he has started to really like using the cane when he is stressed, I hope this one actually hurts a bit less than the rattan ones, but that remains to be seen. All this for less than $20. I will report when these new items get used WEG.

Then, since I was driving by it anyway, I stopped at our local sex toy store. I ended up buying a really nice pair of hand and ankle cuffs. This is something we have discussed before, but never actually tried. I think I am finally ready for this step in our Ds play, and what better time than when he is de-stressing on me and I really, really, don't want to participate, but he needs me there. I have read that these/this can really help to get you into the right headspace. Again, will report when utilized.

I also picked up some candles for use during sex play. Again, this is something that has been discussed but never tried. This one intrigues me. I have a feeling that these, when used with the cuffs, will really push me into subspace. We'll just have to see, won't we.

I haven't yet shown him all this. Hopefully, I won't get a whack for every dollar spent without his direct permission, but if I do, at least it won't be too many. I kept to a tight budget. And, after all, I did by the items out of love for him.

Hmmm, sounds like I am sucking up here, in case he decides to read/find this blog - which is much more likely when I am using his computer to write it.

Okay, dear readers, I have actually got more done here than I anticipated. This may be it for a few more days, so enjoy. And please give me your comments so that I can at least read them while I am computer deprived.

Be Warned! Keep the butt waxed

2004-11-03T13:56:00.000-06:00

Monday, Q came in from work in a fair mood but warned me that over the next two months he may be very stressed and possibly working 80+ hours a week. Therefor, I should keep myself ready every day, in case he has a bad day and needs to use me to de-stress.

The big bosses at his company (a worldwide corp) decided that they wanted him to implement some things (that he had recommended two years ago) and have them ready by the end of the year giving them NO new personnel or resources to get this done. Don't ya just love big companies whose main personnel make the decisions to do something, when they have never even been to this office and have absolutely no idea what they are asking for as far as work involved? Geeze!!!!

At least thinking about this makes me all the more grateful to Q for allowing me to be a stay at home mom, so at least I don't have to deal with this kind of political crap.

A little sex

2004-11-03T13:50:00.000-06:00

Well, in spite of the computer problems, we did find time to have a little fun this last weekend.

I must say that Q is getting quite proficient in playing my nipples until I orgasm. He has learned how to watch my reactions when he grabs them, and puts just the exact amount of pressure to bring me to the pleasure/pain orgasms that I am becoming quite addicted to. The side benefit is that my breasts, in general, are much more sensitive all the time.

He loves to do this wherever I am (kitchen, bathroom, car, etc.), from time to time. Of course he also loves being somewhat evil, and playing with them and NOT letting me come to frustrate me as well. And he likes doing it when I am somewhere where I have to fight to keep from making noise. I think he just likes to see my face turn purple.

Saturday evening, after playing with my breasts while we were getting dressed to go out, Q pushed me on the bed bent at the waist, and quickly entered me from behind (I do love this position) and we had a short, but hot session before we went out to get computer parts.

Sunday, we played around some, although I couldn't give him a full-out BJ (because I have a canker sore on my nose), so I just caught his delicious cum, carefully, in my mouth after a hand job. I will be so glad when this thing heals, because I miss sucking on his delicious cock.

I must say that his general domliness is coming back, even if we haven't had much time for overall activities. He asserts himself whenever the occasion dictates, which is exciting in itself.

I am really loving this lifestyle, even if there are times I question it.

The Weekend

2004-11-03T13:31:00.000-06:00

As I have a few minutes, I will make a quick post on the past weekend.

Friday evening, after dinner, Q gave me a fun spanking session across his lap on the couch. I was great, and I had my first 'spanked to orgasm' session.

We had planned to follow this up with a second session in the bedroom with Q spanking me yet again, for his pleasure (which would have probably been a whole lot harder) and following with lots of hot sex.

But this didn't happen because we were interrupted by our 18 year old looking for an impromptu halloween costume. By the time this had been taken care of, our other child had returned so all plans were interrupted.

Unfortunately, the rest of the weekend was pretty vanilla because by Saturday afternoon my computer was acting up.

I figure that by the time we get my computer back up, I will be in for an intense de-stress (for Q) spanking from his spending so much time on my computer. Q absolutely hates working on the home computers any more, since his main job is working with computers anyway and he now has people to do the mundane work for him. So keep your eyes open for that possible post.

Arrrrgggghh!!!! Computer Problems

2004-11-03T13:21:00.000-06:00

I am posting this quick post so everyone doesn't think I have fallen off the map.

My computer is giving me serious grief (i.e. I am having to basically rebuild the sob).

Until then I have very limited computer time on Q's computer, so posting will be sparse. The last vacation installment will have to wait, as it is tucked on a currently unaccessible hardrive on my computer.

I will also try to keep an 'events' log so that I can catch everyone up when my computer is back up.

I will still check my email, so if you want to contact me go ahead. It may not be too regular, however. But I still like to hear from people.

Thanks for reading, and I should be back with a vengence next week (I hope, I hope).

Vacation-installment #3

2004-10-28T23:08:00.000-05:00

Not much here tonight, except a dozen pops with the rattailed towel for standing in front of our single sink in our bathroom when Q wanted to use it, so here is #3.

After the first week, Q’s dad and our oldest left to come home. Q’s dad was bored with our choice of vacation spots (semi-secluded) and our oldest felt like he needed to get back to work or he would be broke.

This left us one night to spend in a ‘private’ cabin. Unfortunately, for reasons unknown, we were both really tired and chose to pass up the opportunity. Actually, I have to admit, a little of my motivation was also that I didn’t want a spanking (even though I knew I had at least one coming) as well as being tired.

However, the next morning, we had to go over and clean the cabin before turning in the key. I really wasn’t expecting anything other than cleaning the cabin, but to my surprise, Q brought both the flogger and the nasty lexan paddle.

After inspecting and doing what little cleaning needed to be done, Q surprised me by pulling them out. I quickly dropped my bottoms and bent over the back of a chair at his direction. He put his hand on my back and raised my shirt to allow him full access to my back with the flogger and began.

I was totally unprepared for how tender a cool wet bottom is, and he laid into me hard. First with the flogger until he had my feet off the ground kicking with the pain. Then he played with it sensually for a bit and then suddenly ‘Whack’, out of the blue came that damnable lexan paddle. It took less than twenty with it before I had tears in my eyes. Q then, thankfully, switched back to the flogger for another 30 or so hard slaps. Fortunately for me, he very seldom wears a belt, so he didn’t have that tool available as well.

Unfortunately for me, I had been in the surf swimming for about an hour before and was still in my damp swimsuit. I had heard about spankings after baths, but had never personally experienced one – and may I say, I hope to never experience one again. You just have to experience for yourself how much more tender the bottom is after being ‘soaked’. A spanking is unbelievably more painful.

Afterwards he asked me if I had enough, and I quickly assured him that I had, and then properly thanked him for my spanking. My attitude satisfied him but the spanking left us both a bit hot and bothered for the remainder of the day.

That night when we went to bed, we had the only intercourse of the vacation, and man was it hot – even if we had to be quiet. WEG

Vacation-installment #2

2004-10-27T23:55:00.000-05:00

Sex play for the majority of the vacation consisted of Q pinching and twisting my tits until I had an orgasm, or of me giving him head.

In fact, it soon became an evil ‘dom’ game for him to twist my nipples while we were in the car, with the windows open, on the ferry (the ferry was our road to the mainland) and torturing me (WEG) because he knew that I couldn’t be noisy and cry out. This, by itself, is difficult for me, but when he noticed that my eyes had glazed over from excitement, he would then look into my eyes with his sexy, but evil, look and croon, "Come for me baby, you can do it, come for me."

I, of course, complied. I mean, how could I not. He knows just the moves to put on my nipples and breasts to bring me there. WEG

A flogging, just for being a good subbie

2004-10-27T23:46:00.000-05:00

Pre DD/Ds, when I ‘wanted’ something from Q I would lay on the bed naked and tease him when he came home from work.

Now, in trying to get back into the agreed upon proper behavior for a subbie (after coming back from vacation), I greeted him when he came home (and he greeted my nipples with a good pinching) and then went to the bedroom with him while he changed from work. Part of our ‘bedroom’ routine is that I am to be undressed at all times for his use, unless he says otherwise.

Well, this evening, when I undressed, I stretched out on the bed while he undressed and cleaned up. He apparently forgot the routine we had started before vacation, because he assumed I was ‘wanting’ something, instead of just being ready for his use. So when he was finished, he pulled out the toy box and started flogging me, asking if this was what I was wanting.

Well, it really wasn’t, but then again, it wasn’t so bad either WEG. It wasn’t an intense flogging – just enough to get my back red and charge me up for the evening.

The side benefit from it – a date for the weekend for erotic spanking play. I have read so much about the slow building intensity warm up, I want to try it. Then he can play me from there and see where it all leads WEG.

Unfortunately, oral sex is out for at least a couple of days. I have a damned canker sore on my nose, and we definitely don’t want that spreading to the genitals. Hopefully I can get it cleared up by Friday, or I just may be orally deprived – and that tends to make me cranky of late:()

Tonight Q informed me that I was NOT to undress when we went in the bedroom, nor was I to get in bed with him because he needed to sleep and having a ‘minx’ in bed next to him tends to distract him too much. I did give him a backrub before I left the room, and also teased him that it was too bad that his wife of 20 years still made it "hard" (pun intended) for him to go to sleep.

Vacation-installment #1

2004-10-26T23:52:00.000-05:00

The vacationers consisted of my parents, who can be considered elderly because of their infirmities, his dad (who had his own private cabin because he is a loner), our two boys, and us. This made for a fairly ‘vanilla’ two weeks.

I had thought, and hoped, that we would have more opportunities to be alone either in Q’s dad’s cabin, or on secluded areas of the beach, but this was not to pan out, unfortunately.

Since we haven’t been in this lifestyle for very long, the vacation allowed for a ‘slippage’ of sorts into old habits, especially for me.

You might say, that on the fourth day I even got a little ‘bratty’ with my mouth. That evening as Q was sitting on the couch playing video games with our youngest, he requested that I bring him some of the fresh cookies I had made.

I quickly replied with a smirk, "I don’t deliver."

This was very rapidly followed by his raising his eyebrow and responding firmly, "Oh? Well I do."

His statement caused me a moment of pause, realizing that he wasn’t totally dropping his role as my dom. But also knowing that his opportunities for such a ‘delivery’ were going to be limited, I continued to brat and didn’t ‘deliver’ the cookies to him.

We had the only private bedroom in the cabin, but the walls were very thin. Irregardless, that night when we went to bed, he grabbed me by one nipple and started pinching so hard that I had to bury my face in a pillow to muffle my cries. Added to this, he grabbed the backscratcher (which is fairly quiet as implements go – although I am usually not when it is being used on me) and laid at least twenty fast hard ones on my bottom while I muffled the yelps with a pillow.

Q then grabbed me by my hair and shoved me between his legs. "Suck me, slut," he demanded.
I greedily sucked his luscious cock quickly coming to an orgasm and then having yet another as his cum filled my mouth.

Needless to say, we slept quite soundly that night, from the first sex on the vacation, with smiles of contentment on our faces.

Giggles

2004-10-26T23:45:00.000-05:00

Just some giggles tonight. Q and I went to bed as usual for some cuddling. As we were laying there talking, he reached over on his bedside table and rattled his trusty backscratcher while reaching for something else. I immediately sucked in my breath and whimpered an "Oh shit" to which he immediately started laughing.

As I looked at him questioningly, he said "Remember when the rattle of the condom wrapper used to immediately wake you up?"

I had to laugh then at the memory. Back before Q’s vasectomy I developed a ‘Pavlovian’ response to the sound of the condom wrapper. Now I guess I am developing a similar response to the sound of the backscratcher (which always lays readily available to him on his bedside table).

We're back

2004-10-25T11:32:00.000-05:00

We are back, and I finally have my computer back up. The computer decided to blow it’s video card on me less than 24 hours after being turned back on. Guess it was revenge for being left off for so long :)

It will take me a few days to get my few stories from the trip typed into the computer, but will add them to the blog on days that nothing else is going on.

Nothing happened the day we got back because I was totally stressed out after getting lost in Dallas - again. I ABHORE that city and driving in it. NOTHING is marked well and the half that isn’t under construction is usually piled up with semi’s in wrecks. Arrrrrrghhhh!!

Q probably should have beaten me into submission that night, but he took pity on me as I was driving my parents back from the trip and my dad had been backseat driving the whole way through Dallas, on top of my being decidedly PMS.

Saturday night, Q started to re-assert his dominance (we got kind of lax on vacation) by demanding a BJ from his little slut (meJ ) and I, of course, obliged, enjoying his delicious cum.

Sunday morning, I woke up horny, as he had not let me cum the night before so when I heard him stirring in the bedroom, I joined him, naked of course. He called me a ‘minx’ for ‘tricking’ him back into bed. This was soon followed by him teasing and twisting my nipples until I climaxed. As I had been without him in me for so long, I quickly mounted his now stiff member.

However, I was so into the titty play, I soon put his hands on my breasts insisting that he twist and pull on them. This was quickly followed by a couple of orgasms. Q then wanted me to play with them myself. This is one area I cannot seem to be able to stimulate myself well enough to climax, and when he saw this, and my frustration with same, he quickly started playing with them again, much to my delight.

Afterwards, I orally cleaned him off. This is something that I never did (or still do voluntarily – only on his command) prior to the change to a Ds lifestyle. It just kind of turned me off. But amazingly, if he demands that I do it in his Dom voice, then it becomes a turn-on.

Later, my computer decided to blow it’s video card fan and I was going to replace it and get it going myself, but Q decided he would rather do it than listen to me cuss at it. Plus, my wonderful period decided to start about four days early and my PMS symptoms hadn’t yet abated.

So we had a pretty sullen day with each other, me being bitchy, and Q not feeling up to doing anything about it (his back was still sore from the long drive). I spent most of the evening updating video drivers and settings on the computer. He did alleviate a little of my frustration that night by pinching and twisting on my nipples until I had a couple of orgasms.

However, tonight (Monday), when we went to bed, I made a mistake of bringing up a subject which would get him thinking. This is a big no-no, as he has a hard time getting his mind to shut down so that he can go to sleep. Q quickly grabbed a nipple and started pinching really hard, reminding me with a low growl, not to make him think about anything before going to sleep, while at the same time reaching for the backscratcher.

He then laid into my backside with the backscratcher as a reminder that he was still the boss and back in control. Actually, I probably needed a whole lot more spanking than I got, but I didn’t really want one to start with.

It’s amazing to me how ambivalent I get about spanking when my hormones are doing crazy period+PMS+re-adjusting after the trip things. I know I probably ‘need’ a good hard spanking, but I really don’t want it, all at the same time.

Hopefully this week, after a pretty-much vanilla vacation, things will get back to normal and I’ll get settled down one way or another ;)

On vacation....

2004-10-08T22:21:00.000-05:00

We are leaving on vacation tomorrow (10/9) and won't be back until at least the 23rd. So you wonderful readers out there can look for 'catch up' posts from my journal probably around the 25th.

We are going to the Gulf coast so hopefully no more hurricanes, and Q is packing his favorite implements so that he can remind me that he is still the boss WEG.

Thanks for reading and commenting. I'll be looking forward to reading comments when I get back.

Should have a few juicy stories for you when we return. See ya soon.

No stress tonight – Just hot sex

2004-10-07T23:54:00.000-05:00

Q came home from work tonight in a really good mood, grabbed me and kissed me hard and deep.

After grabbing a quick bite to eat, we made our way into the bedroom I let him know that the kids were gone and I asked him if he needed to de-stress tonight. He said no, but he probably wanted to fuck me really hard.

We didn’t get around to it straight away, but later when Q was doing some touch-up waxing on me, he decided to put his bearded face right into my cleanly waxed crotch, while we were waiting for the wax to re-melt.

Ooohhhh the magic my man does with his tongue. He followed that by shoving his extremely hard cock into me very quickly and we had some hard thrusting sex. Before he finished, he rolled me over on my stomach, (bent over the edge of the bed with him standing on the floor) and gave me a few hard swats while he was thrusting into me (I love it when he does this), bringing me to yet another of many orgasms of the evening. Then he came into me hard, yelling for me to cum at the same time, and of course, I obliged.

I then cleaned him off, getting a taste of his delicious cum, before he got into the shower.

While he was in the shower, I went back to the living room to find my youngest home and my father-in-law standing in the room. Talk about slamming into a wall. This man doesn’t like me and is about as negative of a person as there is. Oh well, hopefully he got an earful from the bedroom WEG.

A spoiled subbie

2004-10-06T23:37:00.000-05:00

Nothing much on the spanking front here tonight. Q went to see the masseuse and was feeling quite relaxed when he got home. In fact, our masseuse sent me a fridge magnet that he said fit me pretty well "Ahhhh…..I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again" LOL

Q did do some touch-up waxing on me, and popped me a few times with the little brush we use to lift hairs up off the skin, including several across my well exposed pussy. This, of course, immediately got me hot, and he couldn’t resist playing with me for awhile and giving me several orgasms.

Then when we went to bed to cuddle, he decided I needed a few more orgasms (being the ever so generous master that he is) so he played with my tits until I came a few more times. He just loves doing this. He has always been a ‘breast man’ but mine have never been very sensitive. However, since we discovered that when he pinches and pulls on my nipples hard, and/or bites them hard or uses clips on them and this turns me on, the rest of my breasts also get more sensitive. So now, he spends a lot of time (no complaints here) keeping my nipples sore and sensitive.

Tonight the master made it all about me – he didn’t seem to want or need to have an orgasm of his own. Sometimes he is like that, even when he gets hard playing with my breasts. He is such a love.

Also, it still amazes me how much more often we laugh and find humor in our lives, as well as how much more we enjoy each others company since we have began this journey in our lives. It is absolutely incredible.

Also, Thanks C for linking from your great blog to mine :)